Am i right to feel like this?? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 years ago
#1
So ive been with my GF for 2 years now. She's at a different uni and weve had a long distance relationship. She is more than 6 hours away by train so seeing each other is a bit difficult.

Weve tried seeing each other since once a month but we haven't seen for a few months now. We couldn't spend our anniversary or valentines together. Also as she is a very stresfull person since exams she has literally pushed me away and we haven't spoken properly for 2 months now. On this time there was another guy who was at her uni and was giving her all the attention and support she needed while she was down. Although nothing further happened between them its just frustrating that i couldnt be with that guy.

Also secondly i dont think we are both on the same level intimacy wise. If someone is in long distance relationship then the only way to connect intimately is via phone or skype ( even that she doesnt like much of) Even in person she is very reserved to do most things which in this time a couple should be comfortable doing.

Thirdly we have different long term goals. She wants to get married and have kids early and I want to study further and get settled. So i dont know whether she will be prepared to wait that long.

So bearing all these things in mind, i think i wont be able to handle another year of long distance and ive gone past the point of it affecting me too much even if it does end. Obv a guy has needs and I would rather not something i would regret while im still with her.

What should i do??
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shawn_o1
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#2
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you probably won't. it's time to end it
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by shawn_o1)
you probably won't. it's time to end it
Thank you
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Anonymous #1
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bump?
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Anonymous #1
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No advice anyone?
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shawn_o1
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BC it's obvious
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Matt Burgundy
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Wait a second what are you telling him to end?
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Matt Burgundy
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Well do you need to end your relationship yet?
Is there someone else?
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whatisupishy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
No advice anyone?
well you guys either compromise to try n get along with each other or if you truly love her than change yourself a little bit to suit her! but if that's too much of a struggle than its best to end it! x long distance is NOT EASY!
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DanielleT192
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It's your choice OP. Personally I would discuss ilthese issues with your girlfriend before you cut off the relationship.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Matt Burgundy)
Well do you need to end your relationship yet?
Is there someone else?
No there isnt but i just feel we've drifted too far apart for things to go back to normal.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by whatisupishy)
well you guys either compromise to try n get along with each other or if you truly love her than change yourself a little bit to suit her! but if that's too much of a struggle than its best to end it! x long distance is NOT EASY!
Well its a bit strange that i have to change my perception in a relationship. Why does it not apply to her. A relationship is ideally give and take and both have to compromise a little
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Matt Burgundy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
No there isnt but i just feel we've drifted too far apart for things to go back to normal.
Well then in my opinion you should stay with her but make your opinions voiced, if things can't work then end it before it gets to far. I hope you work this out.
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hopeforthebest1
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Will you be seeing each other this summer after exams? It sounds like you all need a long and very real discussion. She is waving red flags. I think she is disconnecting from you emotionally. If you want to be in a loving, cuddly, there for each other relationship it doesn't sound like you're gonna find that with this girl.
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AgnosticVeggie17
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Hey OP don't feel too down and let this affect your life like crazy, being in a long distance relationship is very difficult (my other half is 5000 miles away ) anyway, i'd say the best thing is to see her on skype and really talk it all out, it might be intense but then you'll be able to get a better understanding if this is something you can figure out together. You're right, relationships do need compromise but if she can't see this it may be up to you to make the first move? And if you ultimately can't see your life with her going in the same direction, with you both being happy, it may be better for both of you to let go now. I'm not in your relationship so I can't tell you wether it is the end or not but I'm sure you will see more clearly if you both discuss your relationship. Good luck
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by hopeforthebest1)
Will you be seeing each other this summer after exams? It sounds like you all need a long and very real discussion. She is waving red flags. I think she is disconnecting from you emotionally. If you want to be in a loving, cuddly, there for each other relationship it doesn't sound like you're gonna find that with this girl.
probably not and thats why another year of long distance it is not gonna help matters. But yes i think everyone is right. need to have a sit down discussion first
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whatisupishy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Well its a bit strange that i have to change my perception in a relationship. Why does it not apply to her. A relationship is ideally give and take and both have to compromise a little
true but in a relationship if one loves the other a bit more then he or she usually does have to change a bit to try and sort things out....but as i said before if that's too much then dont bother unless she is willing to do something about it....all i have learnt from relationships is that both people invloved in it dont balance out...one always (99.9%) has to try a little bit more .......but its your choice at the end of the day.. hope whatever happens, happens for the best
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