Society's war with overweight people... Watch

Advanced Subsidiary
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This could be a long read, so if you're not interested - eject and reject yourself, or read the TL;DR at the bottom.

I think that society's war with overweight people seems to be a bit misaligned.

Overweight people seem to get berated quite a lot online, especially overweight women. I've seen a few girls who are overweight make threads about their inability to get a boyfriend despite guys flirting with them, being touchy-feely and what not.

And the answers they receive are always the same: Just lose weight.

My girlfriend has a bit of extra weight on her, but I'm not going to pressure her into losing it because:

A) That's ****ing cruel

B) She's extremely attractive as she is

If she loses weight at any point, she'll be just as attractive as she was before, because I don't give two hoots about how much she can lift or how far she can run without getting out of breath.

It's never affected our time together, and it's never affected our sex life.

She does sometimes speak about losing weight, but her only motivation is to chase after our kiddies when we have them and not get tired out.

You know, an external motivational factor - building a body that actually matters.

However, my issue stems from those who automatically assume that overweight people are universally unattractive. That their figures are repulsive, not to be lauded with any adoration, gratification or love - just because they are overweight.

The only men who go out with overweight women, are at the bottom of the barrel right?

lel.

There seems to be a small subset of people who think that being happy with your body is a good thing, just as long as you're not overweight. That if you are happy with your body, and you're fat - there is something wrong with you.

I've written many articles all over the web about how society and the media has affected the psyche of men and women. We've been potty trained to become perfect machines of beauty. And that if we can't achieve this ideal, then we're somehow broken, and are in dire need of fixing.

Many people also make the assumption that body positivity is about glamourising and celebrating obesity, but this couldn't be further from the truth.

It's about teaching self-compassion and self-love, regardless of what you look like. It isn't supposed to be just for women either, men should also be encouraged to love themselves, especially whilst they're trying to make lifestyle changes.

Why do people always assume that overweight people are looking to lose weight? That they need health tips?

The health and fitness industry is growing at an alarming rate (£4.08 billion in 2014), more people than ever are registered at some form of health/fitness centre, yet we have more people suffering from physical and mental ills than ever before.

What I've come to learn is that motivation by fear, doesn't get you the best of results.

And tormenting, name-calling and chastising others who don't fit into your ideal, is a surefire way to put that individual further off of making healthy lifestyle changes.

Besides, she's a fantastic cook!

If she was a diet conscious, nibbling rabbit food girl, she wouldn't be able to cook food like this...



Also, she got dem big fish teddies :sexface:



TL;DR: What's your issue with overweight people, and how have their life choices affected your personal quality of life or standard of living?
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Tarte Tatin
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I 100% agree with you that we shouldn't be shaming people about their bodies. On the other hand, I think as a society people should be encouraged to lead healthy lifestyles, not for the sake of people's stupid ideas about beauty, but for health reasons. And to be fair, we already do encourage this, but shaming people needs to stop.
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Brownclown
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Society is shallow and narcissistic, not much you can do about that
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Jaaneman Tu Mera
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Society is to simplistic about things. Whether it is religion, obesity and immigration.
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Black Cat
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I think that if you're perfectly healthy then being slightly overweight isn't such an issue, however our society typically views an overweight person as unhealthy.
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Dheorl
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I don't find overweight people unattractive, I find unfit people unattractive. It just so happens that the two more often than not go hand in hand. I see nothing wrong with encouraging people to be fit and healthy. They'll lead a longer fuller life, put less strain on the health system and cost tax payers less money. I agree that the motivation is often done in the wrong way but I don't see anything wrong in principle with discouraging fatness.
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Schrödingers Cat
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My problem is with massively obese people who cost the NHS lots of money.
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Drunken Bard
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Because it isn't just a case of people having a few extra pounds.

When people start to say "I'm too fat to work and I can't help it" and they receive disability benefit as a result, then you're beginning to take the p***
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Jaaneman Tu Mera
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(Original post by Schrödingers Cat)
My problem is with massively obese people who cost the NHS lots of money.
Well so do people who drink and people who smoke.
People do NOT choose to be obese Everyone has a different metabolism, and everyone has their own struggle.
I mean come on, we live a country which has looted India for centuries. and have enough money to take care of some obese people
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Arkasia
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I have no problem with massively overweight people, I just despise the new culture that surrounds them. This new 'body love' notion is nice in theory - yes, we should all be confident and happy in ourselves and who we are, but it's insidiously grown to become 'fat girls are real girls, skinny girls are nasty fake barbies'. Society has fed itself lies (along with everything else, apparently) and ideas such as "being fat is just as healthy as being skinny" and "real men like curves" have crept into common thought. As you can tell, this is mostly within fat women, with fat men still unfortunately being mocked by both genders.
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Schrödingers Cat
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(Original post by Jaaneman Tu Mera)
Well so do people who drink and people who smoke.
People do NOT choose to be obese Everyone has a different metabolism, and everyone has their own struggle.
I mean come on, we live a country which has looted India for centuries. and have enough money to take care of some obese people
I also have a problem with people who smoke and drink costing the NHS don't get me wrong.

In bold;

That's incredibly naive what makes you think that? Of course they choose to be obese. Everyone has a different metabolism but not by 2000 calories a day lol
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Because being overweight isn't attractive in most people's eyes and it isn't healthy, and generally people who date the overweight are perceived as being desperate or bottom of the chain themselves.
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ForzaFerrari
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Nobody should be shamed, tell me what year it is again? Not 1350 or a year when shaming people was acceptable


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username1221160
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(Original post by Advanced Subsidiary)

And tormenting, name-calling and chastising others who don't fit into your ideal, is a surefire way to put that individual further off of making healthy lifestyle changes.
So true.

Unfortunately most of those who engage in name calling or shaming people about their weight are those who failed to leave the school bully mentality back in the playground. They aren't looking to help people make healthy lifestyle changes.
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SallySparrow66
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(Original post by Drunken Bard)
Because it isn't just a case of people having a few extra pounds.

When people start to say "I'm too fat to work and I can't help it" and they receive disability benefit as a result, then you're beginning to take the p***
(Original post by Schrödingers Cat)
My problem is with massively obese people who cost the NHS lots of money.
(Original post by Dheorl)
I don't find overweight people unattractive, I find unfit people unattractive. It just so happens that the two more often than not go hand in hand. I see nothing wrong with encouraging people to be fit and healthy. They'll lead a longer fuller life, put less strain on the health system and cost tax payers less money. I agree that the motivation is often done in the wrong way but I don't see anything wrong in principle with discouraging fatness.
People seem to assume on here that overweight or fat automatically means morbidly obese. I've never once cost the taxpayer or the NHS any money because of my weight and never intend to. I'm still overweight though...

And you say that you're not bothered by people who aren't causing problems in those areas but when you're shaming people for being fat - all fat people hear it. Not just the ones you're aiming it at. So you can focus your issues as much as you like but you're still shaming people and that's a bullying mentality that you need to get over.

Me, right now being fat affects no one but myself and I'm doing just fine thanks. So why does everyone else seem to be more bothered about my health than I am?
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Schrödingers Cat
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(Original post by SallySparrow66)
People seem to assume on here that overweight or fat automatically means morbidly obese. I've never once cost the taxpayer or the NHS any money because of my weight and never intend to. I'm still overweight though...

And you say that you're not bothered by people who aren't causing problems in those areas but when you're shaming people for being fat - all fat people hear it. Not just the ones you're aiming it at. So you can focus your issues as much as you like but you're still shaming people and that's a bullying mentality that you need to get over.

Me, right now being fat affects no one but myself and I'm doing just fine thanks. So why does everyone else seem to be more bothered about my health than I am?
Didn't say overweight, I know the difference between morbidly obese and being overweight.

Well It's not my fault people can't tell the difference between being a little chubby and being unable to walk because they're so big.

I'm not bothered about you.

I think that other poster had a point about lifestyle though, being fat is also an indicator of being lazy. So it's a turnoff in that sense
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SallySparrow66
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(Original post by Schrödingers Cat)
Didn't say overweight, I know the difference between morbidly obese and being overweight.

Well It's not my fault people can't tell the difference between being a little chubby and being unable to walk because they're so big.

I'm not bothered about you.

I think that other poster had a point about lifestyle though, being fat is also an indicator of being lazy. So it's a turnoff in that sense
Yeah I know that you do, but the thread says overweight. And the entire thing is about overweight people and everyone jumps in talking about morbidly obese people?
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Drunken Bard
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(Original post by SallySparrow66)
People seem to assume on here that overweight or fat automatically means morbidly obese. I've never once cost the taxpayer or the NHS any money because of my weight and never intend to. I'm still overweight though...

And you say that you're not bothered by people who aren't causing problems in those areas but when you're shaming people for being fat - all fat people hear it. Not just the ones you're aiming it at. So you can focus your issues as much as you like but you're still shaming people and that's a bullying mentality that you need to get over.

Me, right now being fat affects no one but myself and I'm doing just fine thanks. So why does everyone else seem to be more bothered about my health than I am?
Bullying mentality how?

Did I say fat people in general? No, I said morbidly obese people who end up becoming so obese that they can't work, and then expect me to pay for them to sit at home and pay for the crap they got fat off in the first place.

I haven't got issues with peoples health, I have issues with people who knowingly cost the taxpayer more money, it's no different to anyone else who abuses the benefits system.
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Schrödingers Cat
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(Original post by SallySparrow66)
Yeah I know that you do, but the thread says overweight. And the entire thing is about overweight people and everyone jumps in talking about morbidly obese people?
I guess that's a fair point, I was just giving my opinion on it because I think a lot of people think overweight means obese and wouldn't actually realise someone was overweight if they were on the limit
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SallySparrow66
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(Original post by Drunken Bard)
Bullying mentality how?

Did I say fat people in general? No, I said morbidly obese people who end up becoming so obese that they can't work, and then expect me to pay for them to sit at home and pay for the crap they got fat off in the first place.

I haven't got issues with peoples health, I have issues with people who knowingly cost the taxpayer more money, it's no different to anyone else who abuses the benefits system.
But the thread isn't about those people inherently? It's about people who have extra weight who are constantly told to 'just lose weight' as the go to response. OP doesn't mention morbid obesity once.
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