The Student Room Group

Need male perspective: keep waiting?

There's a guy that I really like. We've known each other for a while but finally kissed and stuff recently. While we were together a few days ago he was very open: told me how much he likes me, how he can't believe I like him, that I'm good for him, he said he wants to take holidays together and stuff.

Well that was a few days ago. He said he was busy with work, and now he has a relative in town so I haven't seen him. We've still texted loads, but I keep thinking that if he wanted to see me again he'd ask. The texts are flirty but nothing concrete. I guess I just don't know what to do. I don't want to suggest that we meet up and get rejected because rejections suck :frown: But maybe I should just say something? Guys, would you get turned off if a girl asked you to meet up in this situation? I don't want to seem annoying or too eager.

Scroll to see replies

It just sounds as if he is may be busy.

But I'd recommend you be frank and just ask flat out if he still wants to see you, he might try to fob you off, but just ask for a straight yes or no
Reply 2
Ignore the post above this, all that will achieve is making this guy think you're possessive and clingy.

Well on the one hand it does sound like the guy is legitimately busy, on the other I don't particularly see a problem with a question along the line of, "Are you up to anything this weekend?"
I don't feel it would make her seem clingy, since if the guy still likes her, he will simply say yes, and thus wouldn't have a reason to fob her off. If he wasn't however, he probably will try to, so she might as well just get it out of him
i'm a girl but thought i'd say anyway

it does sound a genuine excuse that he's busy, and he obviously isn't ignoring you because he's still texting you. i highly doubt whether he'd have said all that to you the other day and been making it up or have completely changed his mind. just mention it in the (text) conversation, just say "shall we do something when you're free?" or something, i'm sure he'll jump at the chance.
Nah... Not at all, quite the opposite in fact. Go ahead and text him, saying you've missed chilling ou/talking to him and that you wanna see him, but you understand if he's busy with his relative.
Reply 6
Nah. Suggest to meet, but do it non-chalantly. If he's busy, "Maybe some other time. :-)"

Believe it or not, not all guys are freaked out by a girl who takes a little bit of initiative. As long as you are cool about it, he won't care.
Sounds like he actually is busy. Wait a few more days, then ask him whether he's doing anything at the weekend.
Reply 8
OK thanks for the advice! I think I will text him tomorrow and ask if he has plans for Thursday and see what happens.

OMG I like him so much, haven't liked a guy like this in ages so I've forgotten how to act.
Hmm, I'll tell you, if I loved you or liked you alot, I wouldn't care what I'm doing or who I'm with. I'd just want to be with you.
Reply 10
OK well maybe he doesn't like me then :frown:

I'll still ask him if he has plans...if he doesn't like me then it won't make a difference, and if he does he'll probably say yes!
Reply 11
Why
Hmm, I'll tell you, if I loved you or liked you alot, I wouldn't care what I'm doing or who I'm with. I'd just want to be with you.


Within reason. My boyfriend wants to be with me, and he tells me so: but he's got common sense. For example, we've had an essay due in soon, so I haven't seen him in ages, but I know he's into me. Real life does get in the way.

Besides, I had to be away from him for three weeks to visit relatives!

But if you're concerned, just drop him a simple text. I know what it feels like, and this has happened to me...and he responded straight away with an "I'd love to". So there you go. :smile:
Well, in the starting stages of the relationship I'd want to be with her no matter what, provided I liked her or loved her.
why, is this post stated...my bf isnt giving me enough time boo hoo..your response would be something along the lines of...' his world doesnt revolve arounf you'...stop being so...meh
Reply 14
Had to bring this back up.

So we have still been texting and flirting--or we had, at least. He went back to his home town (several hours away) and right before he left sent a normal affectionate text. That was on Thursday. I haven't heard from him since then. I sent him a text on Saturday just saying hi and got no response. Sent another one today and nothing. Both were just "hey hope the weekend is good, etc." Not anything like "why don't you text me back" haha.

So now I'm thinking he's not interested. For him not to text or call for a while seems strange b/c normally we are texting every single day. Maybe he met up with some ex-gf in his hometown.

Anyway...now should I keep waiting? It's just hard because we're all at uni together, if I go on a date with this other guy who has asked me on a date (who I don't like as much as this first one) and the main guy finds out, it could ruin everything :frown: I need advice: basically if I shouldn't keep waiting then I'll go on a date with the other guy and just accept reality :frown:
Look, just stop now. Beyond here it's a point of no return. You'll lose everything you have. Just end it here and now. Either he's playing around with you (Which makes him not worth it) or there's something wrong with his phone (unlikely in two days).
i have no phone signal at my house. i went home from uni and my bf was almost at the point of dispair thinking i was gonna leave him..... but yeah, the world isn't all about you. and life has a habit of gettin in the way of what you want.
Anonymous
Had to bring this back up.

So we have still been texting and flirting--or we had, at least. He went back to his home town (several hours away) and right before he left sent a normal affectionate text. That was on Thursday. I haven't heard from him since then. I sent him a text on Saturday just saying hi and got no response. Sent another one today and nothing. Both were just "hey hope the weekend is good, etc." Not anything like "why don't you text me back" haha.

So now I'm thinking he's not interested. For him not to text or call for a while seems strange b/c normally we are texting every single day. Maybe he met up with some ex-gf in his hometown.

Anyway...now should I keep waiting? It's just hard because we're all at uni together, if I go on a date with this other guy who has asked me on a date (who I don't like as much as this first one) and the main guy finds out, it could ruin everything :frown: I need advice: basically if I shouldn't keep waiting then I'll go on a date with the other guy and just accept reality :frown:


possible crosslines is diffinitive possibity wrong in correct number.
it doesn't sound at all like he is going to reject you :smile:

just go for it, or else wait for him to ask you and stop worrying about it.
notsoperfect
it doesn't sound at all like he is going to reject you :smile:

just go for it, or else wait for him to ask you and stop worrying about it.



nothing lose everthing to possibly gain.