Knowing who you are

I personally found myself by getting hammered (yes, I know this is the answer to all my posts, but its actually true this time). Got so drunk I could barely walk, so I couldn't think about my actions. Was a bit of a legend actually. Acted how I wanted, said what I wanted controversial or not (and they went down well), and what I could remember I was great. So from then on really I just stopped thinking before I acted or spoke. Often times people think I'm drunk (when I've driven to a party or whatever) just because I don't overthink everything. Might help you, might not. Hey, who needs excuses to drink anyway.

Reply 2

white_haired_wizard

16

Anonymous

I'm 18 and feel as if I still don't know who I am. I really want people to like me. Theres this one person who I really get on with. I act a certain way around this person. I wish I could be like that all the time. I rethink what I say when I'm with them and how I behave. It's very hard to do. For most people, personality is never anything you think about. For me, I try to master a great personality all the time. Its not natural. I always think about it. I reflect on literally everything. I want to be liked.

What can I do?

I didn't know who i was till i was approx 20. I wish it had been earlier, but it just so happened that i'm a late starter/developer in life...

We're not always genuine as personalities, we're all social actors at one point or other, but if you find yourself acting too much then something isn't right, i.e you haven't got the 'right' friends for you, whereby there isn't that much similarity going on...there's no point in faking a certain behaviour to fit in, particularly when that behaviour simply isn't you - it's absolutely pointless and fruitless in the long run - take it from me.

Reply 3

white_haired_wizard

"Penises don't please lesbians. And seriously, female orgasms occur because of external stimulation"

That makes me a sad panda #badger#
(its called artistic licence)

Reply 4

white_haired_wizard

16

Yoda

That makes me a sad panda #badger#
(its called artistic licence)

it's a great quote. I could sell shirts (and to a healthy profit margin) with that on it :cool:

Reply 5

i don't mean to sound rude in any way but did you ever suffer from bullying?

Reply 6

Yes. May possibly explain my obsession to doing weights. Fortunatly it stopped years ago.

Reply 7

umm were you talking to me?

Reply 8

Yep.

Reply 9

oh sorry!

woah - the extreme of weights huh? = with girls its worse, you get the whole backbiting, and the rumours- those just never go away

are you still recovering from bullying or you more self-confident now?

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

If you were reffering to me, then no I was never bullied in school. I've lost a lot of confidence from when my dad treated me like sh*te

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

I really want to like myself

Reply 12

white_haired_wizard

16

Anonymous

I really want to like myself

be yourself first, or try to be yourself, then at least then if you find yourself liking yourself, then you know you're at least not being deceitful in liking yourself. You think too much! :wink:

Reply 13

Anonymous #2

I suppose I'm in a similar situation. I know who I am yet I've been held back from being this person for years. To my close friends and people I meet outside of school I'm funny, outgoing, interesting and good company (not being big-headed or anything!) but when I'm at school with 'acquaintances' whom I've known for the past six years I'm awkward, shy, uninteresting and feel like I am trapped in their perceptions on me - which were formed a long time ago. I tried to be 'myself' around them but I just can't break their image of me.

Reply 14

ahh i see
well its like a recovery process like with bullying, you need to believe that you have the right to be here, you have the right to own your life and be who you want to be
maybe you are just scared sub-consiously of being yourself coz when you were younger your dad punished you for being just that

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

wackysparkle

ahh i see
well its like a recovery process like with bullying, you need to believe that you have the right to be here, you have the right to own your life and be who you want to be
maybe you are just scared sub-consiously of being yourself coz when you were younger your dad punished you for being just that

You know what, I think you're right. Thanks

Reply 16

wackysparkle

oh sorry!

woah - the extreme of weights huh? = with girls its worse, you get the whole backbiting, and the rumours- those just never go away

are you still recovering from bullying or you more self-confident now?

I'm fixed, and even further past that. To be honest, I'm guessing its helped in the long run. Mentally I'm very strong, haven't felt stress for ages now, and have been through some very would-be-stressful things recently. And I guess seeing the bullies sweeping up in sainsburys was a nice bonus too.

Reply 17

no problem, glad i could help! :wink:

Reply 18