Worried about my ex

I split up with my bf last week and hes been begging me to take him back. I told him i would if he would do certain things in the relationship (not be how he was etc) and he was like fine but i really need you.
This was yesterday night before i went to bed.
Today he went to the doctors cos hes been crying all week and apparantly hes been diagnosed with 'clinical depression' and is starting on anti depressants. He told me this today and i got scared.

It was like he was blaming me and when i told him to change i also put in there that hes gotta stop being so dependant on me. I ntold him this and he was like it isnt my fault. (meaning mine) and i said i was scared fo him cos i wanted things to change and i KNOW what he will be like because hes had 'depression' before.

TBH i think hes just really emotional, he cries at like everything and bcos he doesnt act depressed AT ALL.
He has nothing to be depressed about and to be frank i have more things that i could be depressed about than him and i worded it 'And you dont see me on bloody anti depressants'

He went offline after that and i havent spoken to him since.

I dont think im in the wrong here, i was willing to take him back after EVERYTHING he has put me through: almost sending me over the edge: and a day after i say i will he puts this on me. I cant have him doing this everytime! (hes done this before to me)

I feel guilty. Am i in the wrong or right here?

Reply 1

ISH

9

I'd kick his ass. Beat him like the bit** monkey he is. You are not wrong here.`

Reply 2

Jonesy_LJ

Well I certainly don't know the ins and outs of your situation, but I really don't think you should be so quick to dismiss his depression, especially as he had it diagnosed by a doctor, it is after all a serious condition.

As for whether or not you should stay with him, well most people prefer not have somebody completely dependant on them, so perhaps if you're feeling this way then the best thing to do is end it.

Reply 3

HeadShock

Jonesy_LJ

Well I certainly don't know the ins and outs of your situation, but I really don't think you should be so quick to dismiss his depression, especially as he had it diagnosed by a doctor, it is after all a serious condition.

As for whether or not you should stay with him, well most people prefer not have somebody completely dependant on them, so perhaps if you're feeling this way then the best thing to do is end it.

amen, i think you have been a quick too quick to understand his situation, many people will suffer naturally, on of my good friends has been taken away to an institution...and she wanted to be happy.

but yes he is being to clingy..you will need to speak to him about it..in person

Reply 4

fleur de lis

15

I think its hard to say given that we don't know the ins and outs of the situation but I also think perhaps you have been a bit quick to judge him about his depression. He could well have it. For one thing, the person doesn't necessarily have to have anything to be depressed about, it can have biological causes. Secondly depression manifests itself in different ways and effects everyone differently.

Obviously it is not your fault he is depressed (or not) and you shouldn't feel guilty about this. And feeling guilty/being worried about making him worse is not a reason to get back with him. If the relationship isn't working and you can't deal with what he's put you through again, maybe you're best off leaving it. If you want to get back with him, be aware that he might need some support if he really is depressed, although he needs to be self dependant as well and not lean too much on you.

Worried about my ex

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