Different friendship groups

I am in first year at uni. I live in a flat with 7 others and we get on all right, although they are more out-going than me and like clubbing etc. I don't mind drinking etc once in a while, but it's not really my thing. I am also in one or two socs where I am slowly making friends from other halls and courses.
My problem is that whenever my flat mates ask me to go out with them I can never go because I am busy with the socs. They aren't in socs by the way. I have to keep putting them off, and I am worried that they will stop inviting me and then I will lose their friendship. i don't want to end up sitting in my room on my own while they fo out without me.
How would you deal with it?

Reply 1

Chase Me

8

There is only one solution to this. Compromise. Is there any reason you should always put your societies above your flatmates? At the end of the day, you have to live with these people. Not only will they perhaps stop inviting you out, they may shun you in general if they feel they have nothing in common with you. It won't hurt to get to know them better, and go out for a few drinks with them every couple of weeks.
It won't hurt to say, 'Sorry society, but I have a previous engagement to attend so I can't make it this time.'

Reply 2

TheShrimp

5

Chase Me

There is only one solution to this. Compromise. Is there any reason you should always put your societies above your flatmates? At the end of the day, you have to live with these people. Not only will they perhaps stop inviting you out, they may shun you in general if they feel they have nothing in common with you. It won't hurt to get to know them better, and go out for a few drinks with them every couple of weeks.
It won't hurt to say, 'Sorry society, but I have a previous engagement to attend so I can't make it this time.'

Exactly, good advice. I don't know what kind of societies you're in, but I'm sure they don't expect you to turn up to every meeting/training session, especially if there are more than one per week.

Good luck!

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Thank you both. After a few hours thinking about it, this is the kind of conclusion I had come to myself.

Different friendship groups

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