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Is being 'boring' a valid reason for dumping someone?

My boyfriend is the nicest boyfriend someone could have. He's realiable, honest, caring and cute.

The problem is I am finding him boring because he doesn't intellectually stimulate me . I thought it was a phrase at first because he is a year younger then me and girls mature more quickly (I'm 19 and he's 18). But I've been waiting 11 months now, and I'm not sure how long I can wait.

Next month is my 1 year anniversary and I don't know whether I should just finish it.

Have any males or females felt like this with their partner at some point?
and is being 'boring' a valid reason for dumping someone?

Reply 1

HeStoleMyCrayon

yep. if he doesnt float your boat, throw him overboard.

Reply 2

Trousers

11

Anonymous

My boyfriend is the nicest boyfriend someone could have. He's realiable, honest, caring and cute.

The problem is I am finding him boring because he doesn't intellectually stimulate me . I thought it was a phrase at first because he is a year younger then me and girls mature more quickly (I'm 19 and he's 18). But I've been waiting 11 months now, and I'm not sure how long I can wait.

Next month is my 1 year anniversary and I don't know whether I should just finish it.

Have any males or females felt like this with their partner at some point?
and is being 'boring' a valid reason for dumping someone?

Unless you're just looking for a bit of fun, yes you do have a valid reason for splitting up. In the long term, your boyfriend should be someone you connect with on every level.

But try to think of a nicer way of putting it - he will be devastated if you just tell him he's boring! And that's not really what you mean anyway. Maybe you should say that you don't think the two of you are very well suited to each other, and tell him you need to be with someone you can talk to.

And, if I were you, I would be very careful not to come across as intellectally superior. It sounds to me like you just have different interests - he might enjoy talking football, and you might enjoy talking politics. It doesn't necessarily mean that he's less mature.

Reply 3

contractador

1

yep

o and what trousers said about being nice about it to him

Reply 4

ice_cube

17

If the spark you need is missing, there's no point in dragging it out.

Find someone who presses all your buttons.

Reply 5

bunthulhu

14

Yeah, if he's not making you happy then that's all there is to it really, and it doesn't sound particularly like something he can work on.

Just make sure you do it nicely and don't tell him he's boring, that'd be mean :frown:

Reply 6

Segat1

16

I dumped a guy for being boring. I didn't tell him that though.

Oh my GOD he was boring. He used to tell me about his job, in great details, which, if you're in gravel isn't really very interesting. I listened for a bit. But there's only so much excitement you can have about crushed rock. And bagging machines.

My new boyfriend is a scientist and I don't even ask.

Reply 7

Anonymous #2

Segat1

I dumped a guy for being boring. I didn't tell him that though.

Oh my GOD he was boring. He used to tell me about his job, in great details, which, if you're in gravel isn't really very interesting. I listened for a bit. But there's only so much excitement you can have about crushed rock. And bagging machines.

My new boyfriend is a scientist and I don't even ask.

to be fair they probably think the same thing about you if they need to go into such detail to keep a conversation

Reply 8

Dimez

14

The three phrases to keep a successful conversation:

"Wow! Really?"

"You're joking!"

"Go on, tell me more!"

You needn't say anymore!

Reply 9

Segat1

16

Anonymous

to be fair they probably think the same thing about you if they need to go into such detail to keep a conversation

Yeah.... Coward. He just had nothing interesting to say.

Reply 10

Anonymous #3

yes dump him
and tell him he's boring, maybe it will prompt him to sort his life out

Reply 11

street

1

maybe if u tell him hes boring, he could change?

Reply 12

ice_cube

17

Anonymous

to be fair they probably think the same thing about you if they need to go into such detail to keep a conversation

And the same probably applies to you, if thats all you feel you have to contribute to the discussion.

Reply 13

samba

6

[irony tag]Perhaps he just doesn't think you're intelligent or interesting enough to keep up a stimulating conversation?

He might think you are good for cleaning and sex, and prefer to chat to his mates :smile:

ps. Dump him and be honest about it.

Reply 14

BlackHawk

17

Anonymous

to be fair they probably think the same thing about you if they need to go into such detail to keep a conversation

Everytime you're mean to someone a kitten dies.

Reply 15

shewantstobeme

10

my ex wasn't intellectually stimulating enough. and i found myself getting so frustrated with him. i dumped him :smile:

Reply 16

NeverMindThat

1

being boring is the BEST reason for dumping someone: and even better: they will be too boring to be emotionally hurt by it!

Reply 17

Wez

14

Tell him what you think.

If he doesn't change, then dump him.

There are so many reasons he may appear boring when in fact he could be interesting, ranging from confidence to a low view of your intelligence.

If he's still boring after a while dump him. :smile:

Reply 18

NeverMindThat

1

Wez

Tell him what you think.

If he doesn't change, then dump him.

There are so many reasons he may appear boring when in fact he could be interesting, ranging from confidence to a low view of your intelligence.

If he's still boring after a while dump him. :smile:

I hate this girl attitude of trying to change people. If he is boring its because he is boring, if he tries to act otherwise on purpose then he wont be being him.

Dump.

Reply 19

Wez

14

Not really - everyone changes the way they act according to who they're with/who they’re talking to. If I talk to someone, use a few relevant complex words and get a blank stare for my troubles I'll start using shorter words and talk about Big Brother and football. :p:

If said person says that they find it boring talking about football/Big Brother and would rather we talk about something intellectually stimulating, then I'll be less 'boring' and talk about 'complex' topics again.

It’s not so much about changing who the person is, as it is changing how the person acts. The first one is very hard imo, the second one isn’t.

Is being 'boring' a valid reason for dumping someone?

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