The Student Room Group

What does this question and comment mean?

I'm quite close to a girl I know and she invited me to come out somewhere on impulse. I did so, and while we were talking we got talking about jewellery/rings, and then marriage, and to cut out all the details, she asked me why I don't have a girlfriend. Also, after not talking on msn or sending any txts for a few days, she msgd me and said "I think youve forgotten me :frown:", any ideas on what this insinuates?

What does it mean when a girl asks this? I've had a lot of different opinions/answers from boys and girls, and keep getting new (mostly positive) answers. Bare in mind generally this girl does seem to give signals but then girls can do one thing (give signs), but mean something completely different so this may not mean anything. And yes, I will tell her how I feel as this is my real chance (but her profile on a site says taken but she doesn't act like she is taken and I have never heard her make a phone call to someone and say things like babe etc that may indicate she is talking to her boyfriend), so please leave out the "just ask her out" type comments.

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Reply 1
oh ffs ask her out :rolleyes:
Reply 2
<shrugs shoulders> Meh, just go for it, nip this situation in the bud. She's reaching out to you, but her hand won't be so far outstretched forever.
Reply 3
She wants you!
Reply 4
when you were out with her and she was asking why you didnt have a gf was there anything to indicate she had a bf?

id say yeah, go for it..like you say you will (good on you) before you get into the 'friend zone'! or she/you move apart or something
Reply 5
There is nothing to indicate she is taken, and when she said these comments, nothing indicating her having a boyfriend. When she asked me why I didn't have a girlfriend,there was nothing telling me she has a boyfriend.

There have also been further and even more obvious hints since this time, but because her myspace says shes taken, there is very little I feel I can do. Of course I can drop hints, but this is difficult as I feel I am limited in what I can do because of this taken thing, but I'm worried that she will go silent on me (which has happened before, then shes back to normal), but also tell me that shes taken or not interested. Finding out her status, or that she is not taken, will boost my confidence and help me to tell her how I feel.

Therefore, as I know one of her close mates, I will ask him if she is taken. This is a "strategy" fraught with danger but I have no other option. I would ask her, but I have never had the chance. My only concern is that he will probably tell her what I asked, or he might say he does not know, which would make the question pointless being asked and he would likely tell her, making me look stupid and no better off than before.
Reply 6
I'd say she likes you. Sorry can't think of anything else to write!
Reply 7
she likes you hun, ask her out already!
Reply 8
Two options:

1) Don't ask her out.
Result: You won't go out with her

2) Ask her out.
Result: You may go out with her

If she says no... who cares? You lose nothing.
If she says yes... you gain poon.
Reply 9
Wez
Two options:

1) Don't ask her out.
Result: You won't go out with her

2) Ask her out.
Result: You may go out with her

If she says no... who cares? You lose nothing.
If she says yes... you gain poon.


Yeah I have recently been thinking like this: what is the worst that can happen? When guys ask girls out and they say no then it seems that no-one really cares, no-one will laugh or take the mickey, so go for it!

Ask her over msn if she wants to go to the cinema or something, say there's this film you really want to see and ask if she wants to come and see it. She invited you out, you can do the same!
Reply 10
:rofl: poon
she means that she wants to talk to you, she misses talking to you as you haven't for a while... you should ask her if she's got a boyfriend to straighten things out next time you talk - if so, you'll know, and if not, she'll get the hint that you're interested!
Reply 12
just a thought...maybe her myspace says taken, as she doesn't want random guys that she doesn't know messaging her. maybe she had a boyfriend ages ago, and hasn't updated her profile in a while/has forgotten.
ask her out..it seems pretty certain she'll say yes.
ames123's suggestion of asking about the film sounds good
x
Reply 13
Funny because I "asked her out" over msn, with me choosing the venue (one that she mentioned a few months back), and she said cool we'll do it on a certain day.

That day came, and I was suffering from a cold (which wouldn't stop me from doing things with her though), and I believed that day she had a lec so I asked her but she said she's off but has to hand something in (assignment). She handed that assignment in on the day before! So she had no reason to go into uni, which, if she did, then she'd have had a reason to txt/ring me and ask me to come into uni and then we'd have done something together. I actually did this asking out thing to get the chance - in person - to tell her how I feel. What was planned involved just me and her as well. So I am trying to meet her and do what has to be done.

To top it off, since I asked her, and as she dropped more and more hints, I kept feeling growing immense pressure. This is a first, and gives me a real sense of urgency and disappointment when I don't get to spend time with her, and even worse if not alone with her. On the one hand I want to avoid her on the other hand I keep organising to meet her (like tell her to come library and she comes, then a mate has to say something stupid, etc).

Now I'm going to talk to her/our mate and ask him about her status, because I am desperate and nothing is otherwise happening. I have my excuses ready, I just hope I get an answer other than "Dunno" (or yes, shes taken).
Reply 14
I too thought her myspace says taken to avoid getting boys adding her, and she has a lot of that happening. She is very pretty (best looking girl I know in uni, and I know loads of good looking girls some of who do modelling work). Her looks intimidate me lol. Her profile also says how she likes to socialise with her bf, so maybe she really is taken? Though she may be saying this to "sell" her status. And she is on her myspace often, adding new friends, etc, but not changing any profile info.

I want to ask her this question in person about whether she has a bf or not as it just shows confidence, and I want to hear her nice voice and look straight in her eyes. I don't like talking on msn as she goes silent, has to brb, etc. But I hardly get to see her due to timetable clashes and us being free and in uni on different times/days. Hence I'm desperate and why I have to ask her mate, which may backfire. How can I ask her this if she says yea shes taken? She knows I've seen her profile, so she'll be thinking can't I read etc. :frown:

I've done the asking out thing, like lets go here, do that, etc, she says yea, but because we haven't talked about feelings or even relationships in any half detail, apart from once when she asked me why I don't hav a partner (this coming after a 30 second talk on marriage - but in person), this whole going out thing doesn't seem special. The only thing that makes it special is the pressure, which I have to fight with.

Also, we have very little in common and I have nothing to say to her sometimes. What to do? :frown:
Reply 15
Bump...
Dont worry about it - women are strange things
Reply 17
Are people seriously comfortable with asking out first date online?

Man!


:tumble:
Reply 18
w00tt
Are people seriously comfortable with asking out first date online?

Man!


:tumble:


Well we ask each other out to places, some alone, some with her mates, fairly often, we are just unlucky that things don't materialise for various reasons (sometimes because she forgets or something, which is sad). This whole asking out thing has been done now and there is no pressure in asking, its like I'm asking a mate when I ask her, which is good, therefore using msn is fine. Also, I'm desperate and I can't wait a week till I see her (and even then, there is no gurantee we will actually see each other). If I wait to do all this in person, then someone on here will probably say "but you're taking too long". :mad: :rolleyes:

I really do feel a sense or urgency, and because she is good looking, I have to be quicker than the competition (if there is any, who knows...).

And I am going to ask her personally if she has a boyfriend, not her mate. Can I be more obvious than that?
Reply 19
Us girls are complicated. She does seem to like you, so follow your initial desire and ask her out.

And as for being in uni on different days, so what? You still have evenings and weekends, don't you? You just need to plan and do your uni work during the day when you're not in lectures (I know, easier said than done) so that you can have the evenings and weekends free.