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Leopards never change their spots.
No this isn't a poat about cheating, it's about this general statement.
I just heard that my friend, who has recently split up with her bf, has slept with 2 random guys in a week, who in a word, are ******s. But in her eyes. she's just "having fun". Since she's broken up with her bf, she has become a slag in less than a week, started up smoking again, goes out a lot of the time etc. Her bf kinda reformed her for about a year and a half, because before they went out she was messed up at school, skipping school to do drugs etc. Now she's falling back into the same pattern. I'm just using this example to illustrate the fact that perhaps people never really do change? I for example have always been a hard worker, but I also like to have a lot of fun, I have the work hard play hard attitude etc. For a while I went out with a guy who was a complete partier and for a few months I fell into that swing of life, but as soon as we broke I went back into my old routine. I just think sometimes that although people can be easily swayed (well I can) and often have plans to change themselves etc, it doesn't usually change much. I'm not saying people can't reform themselves or can't chose a very different pathway in life because I have seen it happen. I just womdered people's views on this, do you think you will stay a very similar person all your life? Have you decided on all your morals and how you wish to live your life when your older? Or, do you think that events and people really can change you?
I just heard that my friend, who has recently split up with her bf, has slept with 2 random guys in a week, who in a word, are ******s. But in her eyes. she's just "having fun". Since she's broken up with her bf, she has become a slag in less than a week, started up smoking again, goes out a lot of the time etc. Her bf kinda reformed her for about a year and a half, because before they went out she was messed up at school, skipping school to do drugs etc. Now she's falling back into the same pattern. I'm just using this example to illustrate the fact that perhaps people never really do change? I for example have always been a hard worker, but I also like to have a lot of fun, I have the work hard play hard attitude etc. For a while I went out with a guy who was a complete partier and for a few months I fell into that swing of life, but as soon as we broke I went back into my old routine. I just think sometimes that although people can be easily swayed (well I can) and often have plans to change themselves etc, it doesn't usually change much. I'm not saying people can't reform themselves or can't chose a very different pathway in life because I have seen it happen. I just womdered people's views on this, do you think you will stay a very similar person all your life? Have you decided on all your morals and how you wish to live your life when your older? Or, do you think that events and people really can change you?
Of course events and people can really change you.
Up until recently, I'd always been really romantic and such a dreamer about love etc, but liked to have fun too.
But lately I had so many clingy obsessive guys, and pressure from all angles, that it just made me want the complete opposite, and now I'm fairly stuck on just going partying all the time, the 'bad guys' so to speak and having lots and lots fun. I don't want love or any of that crap anymore.
That's one attitude I never thought would change with me, but it has.
On a side note, it's a bit harsh of you to call your 'friend' a slag.
Up until recently, I'd always been really romantic and such a dreamer about love etc, but liked to have fun too.
But lately I had so many clingy obsessive guys, and pressure from all angles, that it just made me want the complete opposite, and now I'm fairly stuck on just going partying all the time, the 'bad guys' so to speak and having lots and lots fun. I don't want love or any of that crap anymore.
That's one attitude I never thought would change with me, but it has.
On a side note, it's a bit harsh of you to call your 'friend' a slag.
Reply 2
Well I still love her, but you can't deny what she did was slaggy, I guess you could say I'm disappointed in her.
Reply 3
so she had rebound sex? not really a good idea but certainly non of your business.
i dont know i guess peoples behavior changes accourding to their circumstances, i know when i was living in halls my entire lifestyle changed, now im living back in a more homey environment its changed back again, i didnt change but my behavior did. before i met my bf i didnt play many games, now i play wow pretty much everyday, i know i would cut back if i left him because i wouldnt have someone close to me competing all the time, its not that im any different its just how i would act. i very much doubt your examples pov changed much but she only showed one angle of herself while she was in a relationship.
i dont know i guess peoples behavior changes accourding to their circumstances, i know when i was living in halls my entire lifestyle changed, now im living back in a more homey environment its changed back again, i didnt change but my behavior did. before i met my bf i didnt play many games, now i play wow pretty much everyday, i know i would cut back if i left him because i wouldnt have someone close to me competing all the time, its not that im any different its just how i would act. i very much doubt your examples pov changed much but she only showed one angle of herself while she was in a relationship.
Reply 4
Anonymous
you can't deny what she did was slaggy
with friends like that who needs enemies? your "friend" is doing what she thinks is right for her, who are you to judge her lifestyle choices?
Reply 5
I was just using her as a very random example, her actual actions don't matter, its the comparison that does. And it is my bloody business, she's my friend.
Reply 6
high priestess fnord
with friends like that who needs enemies? your "friend" is doing what she thinks is right for her, who are you to judge her lifestyle choices?
She herself knows its slaggy, look if I had said she was "promiscuous" would that make you feel better?
Reply 7
I agree with the other two posters - of course events and circumstances can change you! your friend's just been through a hard time - just because she has had rebound sex does not make her a slag. She's still the same person, its just different elements of her personality have come out now she's broken up with her boyfriend. Give her a while, and the 'old her' will resurface!
I agree people are intrinsically who they are and never change, they moderate their behavoir and sometimes they start to behave differently but the fundamentals of a person doesn't change. A boast is always a boast, they just learn to mask it. Shy people are always shy, they just learn to hide it. Ect.
So erm in conclusion, you are who you are, and anything but is a front (I have no problem with fronts btw lol)
So erm in conclusion, you are who you are, and anything but is a front (I have no problem with fronts btw lol)
ohyeahoh
I agree people are intrinsically who they are and never change, they moderate their behavoir and sometimes they start to behave differently but the fundamentals of a person doesn't change. A boast is always a boast, they just learn to mask it. Shy people are always shy, they just learn to hide it. Ect.
So erm in conclusion, you are who you are, and anything but is a front (I have no problem with fronts btw lol)
So erm in conclusion, you are who you are, and anything but is a front (I have no problem with fronts btw lol)
I don't think that's true about shyness at all.
I used to be reeeeeeally excruciatingly painfully shy. Now I'm not.
Reply 10
Fleece
I don't think that's true about shyness at all.
I used to be reeeeeeally excruciatingly painfully shy. Now I'm not.
I used to be reeeeeeally excruciatingly painfully shy. Now I'm not.
Isn't that just growing up though?
Reply 12
For me, the shyness thing is definitely true. People usually laugh if I tell them I'm shy because they say they can't see it, but I feel shy every single day, every time I walk into a lecture hall, a party, when I meet someone new. I just learnt to hide it - otherwise I would stay in my room all the time and never go out!
Reply 13
I think we adapt to fit the environment we are in. Mostly it's subconscious changes, but we also consciously adapt our behaviour to fit who we are with and what we are doing.
I have changed a lot personality wise over the past few years. I react differently to things, my opinions on some stuff have changed. I don't agree that people fall back into behavioural patterns and that is their 'natural' way of being because we are all constantly maturing and changing.
I have changed a lot personality wise over the past few years. I react differently to things, my opinions on some stuff have changed. I don't agree that people fall back into behavioural patterns and that is their 'natural' way of being because we are all constantly maturing and changing.
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