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Why do many girls not like being loved lots?

Why is it that a lot of girls "get scared off" if a guy starts saying he loves her loads, or starts getting really affectionate and/or attached. Surely it's a great thing that hte guy likes you that much?

Reply 1

Notebooksecrets

11

I'm sure many girls could say the same about guys.

Reply 2

~the_one~

1

Well its just abit clingy behavior. No one wants a guy whos too attached to you (same goes for guy too), its just annoying. Plus if a guy is constantly saying how much he loves you early on, then you just end up questioning whether you like him as much as he likes you. Which is no, and that leads to problems.
Just take it slow, obviously tell a girl you love her and be affectionate, but it only really works if she feels the same way otherwise its just embarressing for her.

Reply 3

pollystyrene07

1

it's usually the other way round isn't it? guys normally run a mile when you mention the 'L' word.

i suppose it depends how long you've been with her? i think it's inappropriate to say it if you've been together less than 2 months but that's just my opinion. just go with the flow & don't take things too fast.

Reply 4

Profesh

20

Perhaps such a concrete, irrefragable declaration of affection and devotion is anathema to one who can't reciprocate; it implicitly poses an ultimatum, and many would (understandably) feel that the resulting dilemma leaves no margin for compromise.

Reply 5

Love Sheep

1

It's how early on in the relationship that you say the L word which determines if they run away or not! Most girls love being told that they're wanted and loved...it's always good to show affection, but not too much until you really know each other.

Reply 6

Cl@re

All girls are different, some love being loved, others don't. If they love you then it would normally be well received and if they didn't, that is maybe why they take a step back. Even guys take it in different ways. Its generally because we all have similar and mainly 'different' views about Love and what it means etc.

Reply 7

glaucon

8

Personally I think it would be a great thing (and is :smile:

) but some of my friends I know would worry if a guy said that to them because they are scared of thinking that commitment might tie them down and they dont want to have to make any kind of decisions about their future yet, they just want to live for the present.

No one wants a guy whos too attached to you

Not true - just some girls don

Reply 8

high priestess fnord

9

like profesh said, it puts alot of pressure on the girl (or guy) to return all that affection and if she/he doesnt then it makes things awkward. its flattering that someone likes you that much but when they say i love you they expect a reply. if you really dont love them then the only options are to lie (and hurt them later when they find out) or to tell the truth and hurt them now.

Reply 9

lljaneth

i dont think you should NOT say just because you fear they may dump you if you do. surely finding out they dont feel the same way about you is better than being in a relationship where theres an inbalance in how much you like/love/care for eachother? I agree that there is a time restriction as to how soon you should say it, frankly if a guy told me he loved me after 2 weeks of dating i wouldn't believe him. whilst if a guy id been dating 4months or so said it it would definitely be more credible. If you feel it may scare her off you can always show your love in other ways, 'actions speak louder than words' is a cliche for a reason and i'd say girls appreciate actions more.

Reply 10

xsofiax

I suppose it depends how long the relationship has been going on for.
Too much too soon can probably scare girls AND guys off.
Yet the longer the relationship and the more comfortable you are with the person, I suppose it doesn't matter. I love it when my boyfriend tells me he loves me. Makes me feel happy :smile:

Reply 11

jason01

2

Perhaps such a concrete, irrefragable declaration of affection and devotion is anathema to one who can't reciprocate; it implicitly poses an ultimatum, and many would (understandably) feel that the resulting dilemma leaves no margin for compromise.

I hope this is not how you speak.

Reply 12

Butterfly

1

I like it, as long as it's from the right guy.

Reply 13

khil

15

axios

Why is it that a lot of girls "get scared off" if a guy starts saying he loves her loads, or starts getting really affectionate and/or attached. Surely it's a great thing that hte guy likes you that much?

It is a good thing - you just need to know whether the girl is in for something casual or something serious. My bf told me within the first two weeks that he loves me, but since we're both in for a long-term committed relationship, I simply found it sweet and adorable. I love it when he tells me how much he loves me - it's been over a year now :smile:

But yeh, most people nowadays don't go for serious relationships. Sad, really. But when you're scared of commitment, you don't want someone telling you that they love you, cus that's responsibility.

Reply 14

Misogynist

18

Because girls don't know what they want.

Reply 15

hazm

it shows you're insecure and not 100% confident in yourself!

also somebody pointed out girls dont know what they want, you have to show them :biggrin:

*points to self*

Reply 16

minimo

15

axios

Why is it that a lot of girls "get scared off" if a guy starts saying he loves her loads, or starts getting really affectionate and/or attached. Surely it's a great thing that hte guy likes you that much?

I don't get this either. I'd think it a highly endearing a characteristic of someone's personality if they were like this. I assume people like this were just fearful of the commitment that would be associated with such open declarations of love. Obviously, this only applies if both people are in a relationship though - need to rule out dodgy stalkers :wink:

Reply 17

high priestess fnord

9

hazm

it shows you're insecure and not 100% confident in yourself!

also somebody pointed out girls dont know what they want, you have to show them :biggrin:

*points to self*

your arrogance is repulsive

Why do many girls not like being loved lots?

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