The Student Room Group

I told her I liked her, got an unusual responce, what do you think she is feeling?

So I have known this girl for about 5 months, in that time we have become very good friends and I have started to like her a lot. A few weeks ago I sent her an email telling her how I felt (she was on holiday). After an agonising 10 day wait she finally replied but in her reply she didn't actually say what she really felt, she just complimented me a lot and told me that she doesn't like a guy that she used to like.

The standard response when someone tells you they like you is to back off a little so that you do not lead them on etc. but she has done the opposite! Since I told her and she has come back from holiday she has been talking to me more, she opens up to me and calls me when she is upset. She used to do this sometimes but now she does it whenever she has a problem... Then a few days ago she put her arm around my waist when we were walking, although she was kinda drunk, which makes it more confusing because when people are drunk they tend to loose self control and just do what they feel.

What do you think is going through her mind?!

We are really good friends so I guess she could just be ignoring it because she doesn't want it to get in the way of such a good friendship but its very hard for me to get over her when I still have hope...
Well firstly it was a bad idea to spill your feeling in an email! And secondly I don't think it sounds as though she feels the same way about you. But then again good friends sometimes have the potential to become more. Just make sure you don't ruin the friendship all together by diving in head first. Good luck.
Reply 2
I agree with Blackswan - I don't think she likes you in that way.

She is acting different, which is weird, but things often do get weird when feelings come out in a friendship. Perhaps that is her odd way of handling it...

As for this comment:
Then a few days ago she put her arm around my waist when we were walking, although she was kinda drunk, which makes it more confusing because when people are drunk they tend to loose self control and just do what they feel.

That is true to some extent, but for me, it's more about *saying* what I feel and doing what strikes my fancy at any given moment. I don't think about things, I just do them. I am much more touchy-feely when drunk, not because I secretly feel much closer to everyone around me, but because touching/putting my arms around/leaning on people doesn't register to me as meaning anything. I hardly notice it.

I don't know if most people feel this way when drunk or if I'm even making sense...but I'm just saying...don't read too much into what people do when drunk. Seriously. It's not as simple as doing what they feel.

Sorry, man.
yeah, I have to agree with what the above posters have said. Sounds like she doesn't want to be anything more than friends but she doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying that outright. Sorry :frown:
Reply 4
I don't think it was a mistake telling her in an email because it gave her the chance to think before replying, if it was face to face she would have the pressure of thinking about what the hell to say right there and then and the email I sent was very light hearted and relaxed, I didn't declare undying love, I just said that it appears I have fallen for her haha.

I could understand her acting strange but the thing she is not, everything is so unweird that it actually is weird hahaha. We are getting on really well, she is calling me much more than she used to and has "opened up". She has told me things that I don't think anyone else knows about, apart from her parents, which is what has puzzled me. Usually people feel self conscious or awkward when they are around people that they know like them.

You are probably right about why she was acting like she was when she was drunk. What made me wonder was that previously when she has been drunk she has avoided me but that time she did the opposite.

I dunno, I think I will just have to wait and see...
Reply 5
How old are you?

Is asking for a straight yes or no as to whether she likes you a little blunt?
Reply 6
FroggieFrog
How old are you?

Is asking for a straight yes or no as to whether she likes you a little blunt?



18, why? does it matter?

Well I would say it is but we are really good friends so I probably could if I really wanted to. I am reluctant to do that just yet though, I'll wait a while to see if the situation gets any clearer, if not then I may well ask her straight out.
Reply 7
She might like you... If you are really good friends then its hard to know what to do. I think every1s bin there at some point. I think if i was single and that was me, id probably do what shes been doing, I would compliment you without saying i felt the same bcause I would be afraid to say i felt the same. alternatively, u may have brought up some new feelings for her, or made her realise that actually she might want to be more than friends. If so, she might not want to say she feels the same in case she is confused and ends up ruining things. if that makes sense, i no wat im trying to say, but u guys seem to think we are complicated lol so... yea... good luck anyway hun xxx
Reply 8
Fabsgirl
She might like you... If you are really good friends then its hard to know what to do. I think every1s bin there at some point. I think if i was single and that was me, id probably do what shes been doing, I would compliment you without saying i felt the same bcause I would be afraid to say i felt the same. alternatively, u may have brought up some new feelings for her, or made her realise that actually she might want to be more than friends. If so, she might not want to say she feels the same in case she is confused and ends up ruining things. if that makes sense, i no wat im trying to say, but u guys seem to think we are complicated lol so... yea... good luck anyway hun xxx



Haha you are damm complicated! why can't you be straight up! haha

Maybe you are right, I have been chewing it all over in my mind and it seems to be the most likely situation. Yesterday her and a few other friends were all in my room jammin (we are in a band), I was singing a love song that I had written, apparently she was staring at me through out the whole song. Which I think is a good sine.

Or then again she could just be such a good friend that she is trying hard to make sure things are normal and not awkward, so hard that it is confusing me. hahaha

Thanks though
Reply 9
I'd say she likes you :smile:

So she hasn't actually said it, but you'd think if you told her this and she didn't like it she'd run a mile.

Perhaps she's just flattered that you feel that way, but from your last comment, I'd say she does like you :wink:
Reply 10
Do you really think it was wise to tell a girl that you like her over an email, and when she was on holiday. It would have been better to wait until she got home, then tell her in person.

It sounds like she is avoiding the issue at the moment, so I would say that she likes you as a friend and doesn't want to hurt your feelings.