ahh i hate my life, im just really sad yet again and feel like crying. you've probably heard of this time after time. why is life so depressing?
i failed my a levels
i've deferred my place at university because i felt depressed all of the time and therefore wasn't ready for the experience
i have been abused in a relationship - he still rings me to this date giving me abuse on the phone and so does his mates, i really want revenge but i just don't know the best way to do this.
i'm back at home, i'm on job seekers, which I'm really ashamed of.
I've looked for plenty of jobs but they're all asking for experience and when I fill in an application form I don't hear from them.
I'm going to an agency tomorrow and im really frightened
i've lost my confidence
i've lost lots of weight, i look like a skeleton
i used to have muslces and i generally took pride in my appearance.
i get very depressed like now after i;ve had a dirnk but then again i feel like this when i'm sober for weeks on end.
i got angry the other day and hit my self. angry at my looks. i used to always hurt my self, i vowed to stop but i did it the other day.
i haven't achieved anything in my life in the last two years, ive just been a thing.
ah i have some good news, i had my ears pinned back two years ago and the operaiton wasn't successful, in April I'm having the operaiton redone again. i'm really looking forward to that. supose that get'd me through a lot of things. knowing my appearance won;t be such an issue after the operation.
ive just been to see my uni mates for the weekend, theyve bought me some nice clothes for my birthday. im going to miss them.
back at home i dont have any friends. maybe i have chosen to. i dont want to know my 'friends' at home because they are very selfish and make me unhappy.
i feel a bit better for writing this down. i'm gay - hate the fact i am as im really straight axting, im a lad lad, love sport and stuff. campnpeople put me off and the whole gay lifestyle' degrades me. m y mum doesnt accept it and the rest of my family dont even know.
what makes you happyn guys? please state it, i want to admire you all so it gives me some motivation. i want a role model