The Student Room Group

Do i like him? Or just want to like him?

Ok so i like someone, at least i think i like someone, but i'm not sure.... it's tricky.

I'll start from the beginning, i'm 21 and have been single for almost a year. Before that, i was in a long term, long distance relationship, i was expecting that we'd finish uni and then get married. He dumped me instead. Anywho, that's not really the issue - i'm over that, i think.

I think i like this boy. We'll call him Steve. Normally, i'm an over the top flirt with guys i like, and i tend to find out instantly if they're interested or not. But with Steve i've gone all shy. He's the second guy i've been interested in since my ex dumped me a year ago, and (to make things more complicated) he's house mates with, and best friend of, the first guy i was interested in (Jon). Me and Jon *almost* got together, in fact we had a conversation where we both said that we liked each other, but neither of us was ready for a relationship and he was still hoping to get back with his ex (which he has now done).

I got to know Steve because i'm doing a group project with him. It's a year long project, and it's a BIG deal - worth a lot of marks and generally fairly important, so i don't want to tell him i like him unless a) i'm SURE i like him and b) i think he likes me, as awkwardness would be horrid in a year long project like this.

Also, a lot of my friends are getting engaged at the moment. I've been to 4 engagement parties in the last 3 months, my brother is getting married in 3 weeks, and most of the people i know are *happy happy*. At my friends engagement party the other day the guy said "i saw her and i just thought, wow" in his speech, i accept that no one is going to just see me and go "wow" so perhaps i'm just hoping that concentrating on someone i know who will love my personality enough to forgive me my looks is a better way of finding someone than meeting someone randomly. I've never randomly pulled in a club or anything, and only ever had relationships with people who i have been friends with first.

All this adds together to me questioning whether i do like him, or if i just think i like him, or if i just want to like him. I'm not sure what to do. I guess the simple answer is wait and see, but i'm very impatient. I've been trying to find out if he's interested in me, but he's not very open about things. He has said things like "you look pretty in that picture" or "you had some great ideas in the project meeting today" etc. etc. But that could just be him being nice and friendly.

I don't know what i'm asking really. Does anyone have any ideas on how i can figure out if i do like him (and if he likes me) without letting him know that i like him? I thought about playing hard to get, and being really stand-off-ish, but i don't want to play games really.

I know this is a ridiculous thing to be worrying about, but i can't act normally around Steve until i've figured out what i'm feeling. I'm going round to his (and Jon's) house tomo to work on the project, just the two of us. He's asked me to stay to dinner. I hope i remember to talk, i have a habit of going internal and shy when i'm not sure about things. If i like someone, i'm pretty obvious about it. If i don't like someone, it's the same. But if i'm not sure i just say nothing. Hmz
Reply 1
I'm not sure if this helps, but imagine huddling him and kissing him. If you get that warm and fuzzy feeling inside, you like him :wink:
Reply 2
Ask him out! Not better still ask him

"Hey, do you like me?"
"Of course I Do what do you mean?"
"You know, like-like me!"

lol who knows! If you don't sort it no one else will.
Reply 3
I think if you have to ask you already know the answer...