Being let down by a friend

I've been good friends with this guy for over a year now now. For a while when we first met, he developed feelings for me (professing love for me etc). Which was hard cos I am in a long term relationship, and we do get on so well. But anyway that was a while ago now, we've moved on, stayed good friends, and he has a girlfriend now, so its been fine. We meet up quite often and he still calls me his 'best friend' and talks to me about any problems he has with the girlfriend etc. I've always felt that he needs me more than I need him, simply cos I have a lots of other very close friends and he only has me.

But anyway, going on this you'd have though he'd make the effort to meet up, but recently he's been consistently busy and has actually been extremely late for a lot of our meetings. Like an hour/hour and a half with really pathetic excuses. I put up with it, cos he still always tells me he needs me etc and I do care for him. But yesterday, he actually failed to turn up, and has STILL not told me why. I just feel let down, and it has brought all the other times he's let me down to mind. My friends tell me he's a bastard and i should cut all contact, but when he does turn up/ finally make contact, I forget that i was so angry with him. As I said, I do care for him, i and want to be there for him. Should I keep making the effort?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

OP

Edit: I also worry for his girlfriend, and hope he doesnt treat her the way he treats me, his 'best friend'. Maybe he doesnt, but then I would still wonder why he thinks its OK to treat me (or anyone) this way.

Reply 2

Toy Soldier

3

Cut the poor guy loose.

Reply 3

ISH

9

Though I am normally the champion for lost causes, as I am one, do as the fine soldier says. *hands over scissors*

Reply 4

Danny the Geezer

21

Friends who do things like that aren't worth keeping. You know what to do. :wink:

Reply 5

matt@internet

12

Maybe he's just busy lately or got something on his mind that he doesn't want to tell you so he makes up excuses as to why he was late. OR maybe these "pathetic excuses" are real.
I don't think it's your friends' place to judge whether he's a bastard or not.

Reply 6

Student_Bum

1

Maybe he is started to attempt ot distance himself from you, because he's still hankering after you and relieses it's not fair on his girlfriend. Thats what one of my friends did to me. While he still loves me and wants me, he understands i have a boyfriend and there is some distance.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

Student_Bum

Maybe he is started to attempt ot distance himself from you, because he's still hankering after you and relieses it's not fair on his girlfriend. Thats what one of my friends did to me. While he still loves me and wants me, he understands i have a boyfriend and there is some distance.

that may be true, but he is always relaly enthisiastic about meeting up when we chat on the phone/msn. but when it come to it, he just cant get his act together.

He still hasn't been in contact to explain his absence yesterday - it would have been common decency to explan why he didnt make it as soon as his phone was charged up (he explained earlier in the day that it was running out) :frown:

Being let down by a friend

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