The Student Room Group

oops destroyed a friendship :(

i used to be really good friends with this guy, like we'd talk everyday without fail for 2/3 months straight and i kinda started to like hiim... and yes... i told him. (to be fair i thought he liked me too because he told his friends he thought i was hot and was just generally very flirty towards me) he said he only liked me as a friend which was fair enough and for a week or two we kinda ignored that conversation ever happened. but i havent actually spoken to him in the past month now and i feel its a kind of shame as we were such good friends! i want to start talking to him again but i feel like if i start he might think i like him again? it used to be him always saying hi as soon as i signed on msn and i feel any phone call would be far too awkward.
any suggestions/ sympathy welcome :frown:
Reply 1
anyone?
Reply 2
Poor. You.
Aw unlucky :frown:

Surely you can start talking to him again though? Start an msn conversation with a link to an article that you think will appeal to him, so it seems natural. Don't you have any mutual friends or anything that enable you to talk to him in a natural environment?
Reply 4
the article is a good idea, think of something that reminds you of him and show im it, ie a song you both used to like, a book he wanted to read, something along those lines? "i saw this and thought of you" kind of thing?

that will break the ice, and then you can progress from there? it should come pretty easily if you havent talked for a while, i would imagine you would have lots of things to talk about - whats happened lately etc.

im not sure that he would think you like him again - if hes got any common sense, he would realise you took time to get over him, and now you feel confident being friends again? but then guys dont have much common sense! maybe dont bring that previous situation up as it might lead to awkwardness.

hope it goes well!
I've been in a similar situation as the guy, and minus most of the attraction part. While I enjoyed what we had, and felt that it was my fault that we had to part ways, now I don't really care whether they bother to contact me or not. I left the ball in their court; If they still wanna be friends, they know how to find me.
hasnt he blocked you on msn?
Reply 7
nope he hasnt blocked me on msn a good sign i guess

i suppose i dont really want to start the conversation because before it was always him who started it. i thought things went back to normal as we just never mentioned it ever again but i guess not as he just doesnt talk to me now. i guess im just scared if i start its just going to be all awkward and not how it used to be
I sympathise with you entirely! I thought I was so close to one guy, we'd known each other for years and eventually it got to the stage where we talked almost every night for several hours and he was always making suggestive comments, we'd tell each other really personal stuff etc. True, it was only on MSN, but when we did see each other in 'real life' there was definitely something between us. I finally told him how I felt, sure he felt the same...he made some excuse but didn't say "no thanks" explicitly...then just stopped talking to me!! So we went from have daily contact to maybe a polite conversation every week or so, and after a few months - nothing!! I tried the idea of leaving the ball in their court, but it just hurt me when he really did nothing and we drifted further apart. My advice is be straight up, tell him you're sorry, you didn't mean to wreck the friendship and can it go back to the way it was, because you miss having him as a friend...I'd be interested in what happens since my response to my situation clearly wasn't the right one...good luck!
Anonymous
I've been in a similar situation as the guy, and minus most of the attraction part. While I enjoyed what we had, and felt that it was my fault that we had to part ways, now I don't really care whether they bother to contact me or not. I left the ball in their court; If they still wanna be friends, they know how to find me.


everything should be as you expect it to be shouldn't it.
ah thats good, that he didnt block you :smile:
Anonymous
everything should be as you expect it to be shouldn't it.


eh?
Reply 12
too many anonymouses floating about!

Anonymous
I sympathise with you entirely! I thought I was so close to one guy, we'd known each other for years and eventually it got to the stage where we talked almost every night for several hours and he was always making suggestive comments, we'd tell each other really personal stuff etc. True, it was only on MSN, but when we did see each other in 'real life' there was definitely something between us. I finally told him how I felt, sure he felt the same...he made some excuse but didn't say "no thanks" explicitly...then just stopped talking to me!! So we went from have daily contact to maybe a polite conversation every week or so, and after a few months - nothing!! I tried the idea of leaving the ball in their court, but it just hurt me when he really did nothing and we drifted further apart. My advice is be straight up, tell him you're sorry, you didn't mean to wreck the friendship and can it go back to the way it was, because you miss having him as a friend...I'd be interested in what happens since my response to my situation clearly wasn't the right one...good luck!


i really dont wanna bring it up again, maybe il try talking to him and casually say something like wow we havent spoken for ages... it sucks when guys do stuff like this doesnt it!!

ty for everyone else's replies