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Next year housemate issues.
What it is is that i am supposed to be moving in with 5 people next year. One is my mate who i go back with for 10 years. Another is my course bestmate. And the others are connected to us in various ways.
The problem is is that 4 of the 5 people want to live in a COMPLETELY different area to me and my long friend. And they dont seem to care that most of the 6 beds have gone now so we would be basically screwed because they prefer to go the cinema instead of looking for a house when me and my long friend have got appointments for.
So me and my long friend have decided to go on our own... but i dont know how to break it to the others. Im scared they guna get all angry and shout and i really dont want that at all cos they are good friends of mine.
How should i break it to them?
The problem is is that 4 of the 5 people want to live in a COMPLETELY different area to me and my long friend. And they dont seem to care that most of the 6 beds have gone now so we would be basically screwed because they prefer to go the cinema instead of looking for a house when me and my long friend have got appointments for.
So me and my long friend have decided to go on our own... but i dont know how to break it to the others. Im scared they guna get all angry and shout and i really dont want that at all cos they are good friends of mine.
How should i break it to them?
Reply 1
If you can't sort simple things out with these 5 people (like house-viewing), then how are you 5 going to deal with the big issues that will arise when you actually get a house with them (ie. paying bills etc?).
Sounds like you should find some new potential housemates.
Sounds like you should find some new potential housemates.
Reply 2
I think its a good idea. These people sound lazy and that is never a good idea when you're sharing a house. I think you should just tell them straight out. It's difficult, but its also the best way!! You'll feel better for getting it out of the way.
Reply 3
Just tell them that you've decided to find somewhere for just you and your friend. If they make a fuss just explain that there arn't any houses left to accommodate all of you.
Some of my housemates wanted to move to different houses last year while I wanted to stay but I didn't mind. You'll probably find it'll be better off not living with them if you can't manage to sort something like this out.
Some of my housemates wanted to move to different houses last year while I wanted to stay but I didn't mind. You'll probably find it'll be better off not living with them if you can't manage to sort something like this out.
Reply 4
I had a similar situation to you, where our group of 6 decided to split into two because even though we loved the other three to pieces, it just wouldn't work with us living together.
Maybe the best way is just to arrange to meet up for coffee somewhere neutral (so they can't get too angry, as they'd just look really silly having a tantrum in public). Then just ask, 'Where do we all stand with the househunting right now?' and wait for their answer. If they seem completely ambivalent then perhaps suggest that as it seems they're not very interested in getting somewhere soon, that you and your other friend find somewhere.
TBH, the fact that they've not made any effort with regard to finding a house makes me wonder whether they do actually want to live with you guys and are just waiting to find the right time to tell you they want to live on their own?
For me, it was a horrible week, waiting to tell them, but once it was done it was done...
...and my two flatmates-to-be and I signed the contract for our gorgeous new flat yesterday
Believe me, it's all worth it.
Maybe the best way is just to arrange to meet up for coffee somewhere neutral (so they can't get too angry, as they'd just look really silly having a tantrum in public). Then just ask, 'Where do we all stand with the househunting right now?' and wait for their answer. If they seem completely ambivalent then perhaps suggest that as it seems they're not very interested in getting somewhere soon, that you and your other friend find somewhere.
TBH, the fact that they've not made any effort with regard to finding a house makes me wonder whether they do actually want to live with you guys and are just waiting to find the right time to tell you they want to live on their own?
For me, it was a horrible week, waiting to tell them, but once it was done it was done...
...and my two flatmates-to-be and I signed the contract for our gorgeous new flat yesterday
Believe me, it's all worth it.
Reply 5
I'd say do whats best for YOU
ive spent far too long of my university life caring and thinking about others, and at times its best just to be a little selfish and do your own thing.
you also have to remember (that people seemingly forget) that university is only for 3years (for most students) and that at the end of that period your going to go separate ways. Sure you may keep in touch, but you won't be living together, and could possibly be living at opposite ends of the country or even different countries. Some students seem to have this crazy idea that its going to be student life forever.
so basically i'd say break to them in the nicest way you can, but ultimately think of yourself and your own happiness, it sounds like you'll get on better living with your long-term friend. Also you can easily remain friends with the others, living with them isn't compulsory for a friendship.
its taken me nearly 18months to realize that your never going to please everyone, so you have to look out for number1, especially when it comes to living somewhere, as if your living in a house you don't like it will annoy you on a daily basis.
ive spent far too long of my university life caring and thinking about others, and at times its best just to be a little selfish and do your own thing.
you also have to remember (that people seemingly forget) that university is only for 3years (for most students) and that at the end of that period your going to go separate ways. Sure you may keep in touch, but you won't be living together, and could possibly be living at opposite ends of the country or even different countries. Some students seem to have this crazy idea that its going to be student life forever.
so basically i'd say break to them in the nicest way you can, but ultimately think of yourself and your own happiness, it sounds like you'll get on better living with your long-term friend. Also you can easily remain friends with the others, living with them isn't compulsory for a friendship.
its taken me nearly 18months to realize that your never going to please everyone, so you have to look out for number1, especially when it comes to living somewhere, as if your living in a house you don't like it will annoy you on a daily basis.
Reply 6
Sausage
What it is is that i am supposed to be moving in with 5 people next year. One is my mate who i go back with for 10 years. Another is my course bestmate. And the others are connected to us in various ways.
The problem is is that 4 of the 5 people want to live in a COMPLETELY different area to me and my long friend. And they dont seem to care that most of the 6 beds have gone now so we would be basically screwed because they prefer to go the cinema instead of looking for a house when me and my long friend have got appointments for.
So me and my long friend have decided to go on our own... but i dont know how to break it to the others. Im scared they guna get all angry and shout and i really dont want that at all cos they are good friends of mine.
How should i break it to them?
The problem is is that 4 of the 5 people want to live in a COMPLETELY different area to me and my long friend. And they dont seem to care that most of the 6 beds have gone now so we would be basically screwed because they prefer to go the cinema instead of looking for a house when me and my long friend have got appointments for.
So me and my long friend have decided to go on our own... but i dont know how to break it to the others. Im scared they guna get all angry and shout and i really dont want that at all cos they are good friends of mine.
How should i break it to them?
Tell them basically by saying 'sorry guys we dont realy wanna move in with you next year' and if they start kicking up a fuss or getting angry just turn round and tell them straight that they couldn't be arsed to go and look at houses so its their own fault if they are not willing to put the effort in!!!
Reply 7
Don't tell them and hope they don't notice
I was going to basically say 'Look its not going to work us living together... if we cant even get on now then living with each other for a year aint going to work. It aint you its me' type thing 
I really hate being the bringer of bad news but i actually really dont want to live with them!
I really hate being the bringer of bad news but i actually really dont want to live with them!
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