The Student Room Group

Past has come back

My friend has starting hanging out again with Lee who I fell out who caused trouble 2 years ago and cheated on another one of our friends. She told me Lee kept slagging me off and he asked if I was still a virgin :eek: She said I don't like lying to people (I thought it is none of his business) so she told Lee I've been with my guy for 2 years what does that say and that i regularly tell her dirty stories. For the record I still am a virgin but that's another story.

Also Lee tells her my ex said I was frightened to death of him and rejected him in a hotel room and my ex always slags me off. I was furious as my ex treated me like dirt, saw him 4 times in a long distance relationship and whenever we met its cos he wanted to go to the shops in my car which I had to travel to see him or he wanted one thing. I never fancied my ex at all which is why I didn't want to do anything with him but my ex has exaggerated the hotel room scenario (hotel room makes you feel cheap).

I accidently let slip a male friend isn't keen Lee and she sounded surprised but I had to make an excuse so I hope she doesn't tell Lee as a row could break out. Lee keeps telling her things and she is going to be 'having' people for lying to her, she says Lee wouldn't lie to her :rolleyes:

We are all in our early 20s so it is a bit childish for this to be going on. I just want this Lee out of our lives, he asked about me but she tells him my business and now I think can't I even trust my own friend - I don't want him knowing what I do. I don't understand why she likes Lee as all he does is slags me off even though I haven't seen him for 2 years, it upsets me people are saying things and she wants to associate with them. I don't know why she wants to repeat awful things.

Reply 1

She sounds very spiteful to tell you he has been saying bad things. Maybe he is trying to cause a rift between you and your friend? If she is telling him your business you may want to reconsider the friendship as she is breaking the trust. Sounds like he still lives in the past.

Reply 2

Anonymous
My friend has starting hanging out again with Lee who I fell out who caused trouble 2 years ago and cheated on another one of our friends. She told me Lee kept slagging me off and he asked if I was still a virgin :eek: She said I don't like lying to people (I thought it is none of his business) so she told Lee I've been with my guy for 2 years what does that say and that i regularly tell her dirty stories. For the record I still am a virgin but that's another story.

Also Lee tells her my ex said I was frightened to death of him and rejected him in a hotel room and my ex always slags me off. I was furious as my ex treated me like dirt, saw him 4 times in a long distance relationship and whenever we met its cos he wanted to go to the shops in my car which I had to travel to see him or he wanted one thing. I never fancied my ex at all which is why I didn't want to do anything with him but my ex has exaggerated the hotel room scenario (hotel room makes you feel cheap).

I accidently let slip a male friend isn't keen Lee and she sounded surprised but I had to make an excuse so I hope she doesn't tell Lee as a row could break out. Lee keeps telling her things and she is going to be 'having' people for lying to her, she says Lee wouldn't lie to her :rolleyes:

We are all in our early 20s so it is a bit childish for this to be going on. I just want this Lee out of our lives, he asked about me but she tells him my business and now I think can't I even trust my own friend - I don't want him knowing what I do. I don't understand why she likes Lee as all he does is slags me off even though I haven't seen him for 2 years, it upsets me people are saying things and she wants to associate with them. I don't know why she wants to repeat awful things.


My advice, for what it's worth, is to stay friends with her and treat exactly the same, but just don't talk about lee, or bring him into your friendship. I know it hurts that she's treating you like this and you want to ask her why, but just politely ignoring lee and not objecting to her hanging around with him is the best way to go.
If she feels you don't like him, or you're trying to make her choose betwen them, she'll probably be automaticlly stubborn and stick with him.

It sounds like she is probably the one with problmes; and is trying to solve them by attention seeking. give her lots of attention for the right reasons, take her to the cinema and have friendly chats, but just don't engage when she talks about lee/tries to wind you up. nod politely, and sound mildly interested (be polite/bite your tougue should be your mantra!) and hopefully she'll soon get bored of the whole thing.

Hope it all works out!