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I can't think for myself

Not that this depresses me so much; but I feel the lack of freedom when I'm aware that, as I grow and become an adult, my thoughts, opinions, personality and character depend more and more on other people: my parents, my friends, society, politicians, philosophers...

Somewhere in time I lost my trust in myself. Not self-confidence, this is self-reliance. To rely on my own experience, my own logic, way of life.
I know that for many people "it's absolutely normal" - but I feel that in past I (or maybe also everyone else?) have been less vulnerable to agreeing with other people without thinking hard...

See? The very fact that I write here, asking for your opinion or advice, means that I don't rely on my own logic, my common sense and ability to act and think, anymore - I need to ask around before being sure what to do... or even what to think.

Do you sometimes feel like this, as well?

Reply 1

Vohamanah

Yes lots.

I'm aware that I'm very easily swayed by other people's opinions. I sometimes feel I am unable to come up with a thought of my own without someone having instilled it in my head.

But then there are so many sources of opinion nowadays. Everyone from the newsreaders on TV, celebrities etc. are all trying to force their ideas into your head. I guess its only natural to feel at a loss.

Reply 2

TempusReborn

Ideas to Reclaim your feel of Self Reliance

Read something like an Oil manufacturers Article on why Climate change dosn't really exist. Then sit there and think to yourself about the arguements. Or list the supposed properties of God and think how they could possibly fit together.

Critically assess all that you hear - if ateacher tells you something in class like "The Earth moves in an orbital around the sun" don't accept it - ask why?

But the crux you face is this - A many million of humans have come and gone formulating new ideas, changing what was idea to theory, theory to fact, fact to conclusion. But now in schools you are just told the conclusions they came too because they were right. The ideas of a million minds can not be thought in a lifetime. I am only where I am today by standing on the shoulder's of giants - Issac Newton.

Perhaps you could get on the frontiers of a subject such as Philosophy or Science and then you too could enrich the knowledge of hummanity.

I hope there's at least one thing there that was helpful. Always critically assess everything with your own reason. :smile:

Reply 3

iis

I don't think I share the feelings of the OP, but in situations similar to how they describe where they worry that someone else is influencing their opinions, I feel I'm completely ignorant in whatever they're talking about and feel the need to immediately read everything about the topic on Google and Wikipedia. It's a bit obsessive, but it does broaden your worldview. Try reading arguments for both sides... and remember that just as money and self-interest can lead to people spouting a lot of propoganda and lies, so can 'a good cause'. (I'm reminded of the US campaigner who said that 45 homeless people die per minute in his country (which would mean that several million hobos would die per month), and the anti-GM campaigner who triumphantly announced in a debate with a scientist "I don't care what you say! I'll never eat any food that contains genes!")

Read up on critical thinking skills and rhetoric, and when you suddenly feel for or against something 100%, ask yourself why. The very fact that you are even worried about this shows that you are already headed in the right direction to becoming a rational, critical person.

Reply 4

matt@internet

OP I feel like that a lot and it really upsets me actually. The fact that I need to ask what someone else thinks is so frustrating. And in terms of opinion, I seem to agree with whatever the most popular opinion is, or the opinion I last heard. Though I'm starting to form my own opinions myself which is a good thing.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

its interesting you say this as most people would 'normally' say the opposite happens and as you get older your thoughts become *more* free and independent of outside influences, however i feel exactly the same as you and i also hate it