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Should I say anything?

I've known a friend of mine for nearly seven years now, but it's been in the past year that i've really gotten to know her, and consider her one of my best friends.
But towards the end of last year, I started to realise there was a bit more, and whilst I dismissed it at first, it hasn't gone away. She's a couple of years older than me, and we're both girls.
I'm really confused, because I know I fancy guys, but I guess i've always known deep down that I quite like some girls too. By now, I am really sure it's not just a passing thing, or that we're just good friends, I definitely have sexual feelings for her.
Trouble is, it makes me nervous when I see her, and I know i've changed how I act around her (not intentionally obviously), and I end up looking like an idiot! I guess I just want to scream it out, let it all out, and talk about it. But I don't know how. And I don't want to ruin anything. Is there any chance she likes me too? Or should I just bottle it up?

Reply 1

xatm092

Oh dear. I think she would be very freaked out to find that one of her best friends has sexual feelings for her :frown:

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

I would advise you to stay quiet if I were you...

Reply 3

L0RA

I really dont know what to suggest. If one of my best friends came to me and said they had sexual feelings for me i would be very confused and because of that i'd probably push them away.

Only you know whether she might have feelings for you too since we dont know how she feels but i suggest you dont come straight out with it and tell her how you feel unless you know it wont ruin your friendship. Unfortunately it probably will ruin your friendship unless she feels the same way so theres no point telling her unless you know she has feelings for you or if you've decided your feelings are too great to continue just being friends with her and its all or nothing for you :frown:

Good Luck.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

I was afraid of that.
Thank you, I really have no clue what she thinks at all.
I know what you mean, i'd be shocked if someone said that to me, unless it was her of course!

Reply 5

mr_person

I advise against telling her.

Reply 6

matt@internet

Ach that is a problem. Personally if one of my friend said that too me and I didn't like them then I'd say straight out "sorry mate, I don't feel like that." But I'd try to maintain friendship with them. I wouldn't act any differently around them. Just treat them the same as I always had, while respectfully acknowledging their feelings, but rejecting them.
Personally I advise against telling her. Unless, as L0RA said, it's an "all or nothing" thing with you. In which case, well I guess you'd either just have to, slowly, cut her out of her life, if you know she wouldn't take the news well. If you think she wouldn't act too badly then I'd be straight with her about your feelings. It's all about how well you know her and how well you can anticipate her reactions.

Reply 7

KaramelRose

Oh sweetheart, I feel for you. This can't be an easy situation to be in.

Like everyone else, if one of my close friends said they had feelings for me - I'd be a bit freaked out (and to be honest, I'd probably laugh to begin with until I realised she was being serious). If your friendship means a lot to her, then she'll definitley try and maintain it - even if it is a little bit strained at first as she may well feel uncomfortable.

Has she ever hinted at having feelings towards other girls? Does she have a boyfriend?