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What's the difference between Bicurious and bisexual?

Hey sorry for yet another thread on the subject of sexuality :smile:

I was just wondering if anyone could shed any light on the differences between being bicurious and being bisexual?

I'm female and I'm starting to consider myself bicurious as I fantasize about 'making out' with another girl. I also have feelings for one of my best mates, who is also female. Is it only if I actually did make out with her (or any other female) that I would be bisexual? :s-smilie:

I'm actually starting to lose interest in men which is really odd for me :redface:

At the minute I feel like I would prefer to cuddle with a girl in bed than a guy :s-smilie:

could this be because I don't get much female contact at home so I crave it more? Arghh I'm confused :frown:

x

Reply 1

Zoecb

11

Being bicurious is where you think you might enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.
Being bisexual is where you know you enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.

I don't think people can know they're bisexual until they're tried it, full sex and all, and liked it. That's why I don't call really myself bisexual as such - I haven't tried it yet. I speculate that I will like it but since I haven't tried I don't really have the authority to say whether or not I am!

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Zoecb

Being bicurious is where you think you might enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.
Being bisexual is where you know you enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.

I don't think people can know they're bisexual until they're tried it, full sex and all, and liked it. That's why I don't call really myself bisexual as such - I haven't tried it yet. I speculate that I will like it but since I haven't tried I don't really have the authority to say whether or not I am!

Thanks, that's helped a lot! :hugs:

Yeah, I was thinking that you'd only be bisexual if you had actually had a sexual experience with another member of the same sex.

I've kissed another girl on the lips a few times but that's about it (unfortunately :frown:

)

x

oh, I also want to ask; I haven't had any sexual experiences with a guy either, is it possible that once I (if I ever do) have an experience with a girl, I will become 'fully gay'? or would I already know if I was?

How could I go about experimenting with the same sex, without going to an LGBT society. I wish I could ask my female friends if I could 'practice' making out with them for whenever I finally meet a guy but I'm too embarrassed to ask :frown:

Reply 3

partoftheprocess

Anonymous

I wish I could ask my female friends if I could 'practice' making out with them for whenever I finally meet a guy but I'm too embarrassed to ask :frown:

thats just weird :s-smilie:

i wouldnt ask if i were you...

with regard to the original question, i dont see a distinction. all these labels annoy me. you're human, young and horny.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

partoftheprocess

thats just weird :s-smilie:

i wouldnt ask if i were you...

with regard to the original question, i dont see a distinction. all these labels annoy me. you're human, young and horny.

Yeah I saw how silly it sounded after I posted it :redface:

ah well

Yeah I see your point about labels :smile:

Reply 5

BURRY

ive kissed two men in the last month...
both friends on nights out, although it was allright and good fun and games,
i count myself as straight.

um... who else (male) has the gonads to admit they made made out with their mates?

Reply 6

ßlαcksωαn

17

bicurious-your not sure of you're bisexual, so you do some experimenting.
bisexual-you're pretty much 100% sure you're into both sexes.

Reply 7

croissantfever

12

bicurios, you wouldn't mind making out eiht the saem sex

bisexual you want a relationship with the sam esex

Reply 8

Jonatan

13

Zoecb

Being bicurious is where you think you might enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.
Being bisexual is where you know you enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.

It need not be sexual... Bisexuality refers to aesthetic, romantic, or sexual desire for individuals of either gender or of either sex. Unfortuanetly the word appears to imply attraction of a sexual nature, but just like many other words have a meaning different from its literal derivation, so does the term "bisexuality". Indeed, in many languages the literal translation would be "bi-philic".

Wikipedia has a more detailed discussion on the terminology:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bisexuality#Terminology

Reply 9

Jonatan

13

Zoecb

I don't think people can know they're bisexual until they're tried it, full sex and all, and liked it.

Rubbish. By analgoy, you wouldn't be able to know you were gay/straight before having tried sex with both genders and making sure you didn't like it with one. It would also appear to imply you can't know you are not asexual if you are a virgin. No, really, it is perfectly possible to know you're bi without having had sex with a person of each sex and/or gender (they are not the same thing). I know this from personal experience, and whereas the full details would get a little explicit, trust me, I know.

Reply 10

Jonatan

13

Anonymous

Yeah, I was thinking that you'd only be bisexual if you had actually had a sexual experience with another member of the same sex.

I've kissed another girl on the lips a few times but that's about it (unfortunately :frown:

)

x

oh, I also want to ask; I haven't had any sexual experiences with a guy either, is it possible that once I (if I ever do) have an experience with a girl, I will become 'fully gay'? or would I already know if I was?

How could I go about experimenting with the same sex, without going to an LGBT society. I wish I could ask my female friends if I could 'practice' making out with them for whenever I finally meet a guy but I'm too embarrassed to ask :frown:

Being gay/bi/straight or whatever is not about what you have or haven't done, it is about what you WANT to do. Also, it isn't simply a matter of sex, nor is there any clear unambiguous definition. Being Bi is not a club with a dresscode and code of conduct. YOu feel how you feel and you liek what you like, wether you call yourself bisexual or not is purely a matter of how you describe yourself, it doesn't change who you truly are.

It is generally agreed by most psychologists that you mostly can't change your sexual orientation (and attempts to deliberately do so are considered potentially harmful ). It is of course possible that you might find you have a strong preference for either gender that you only find out from experimentation, and you may find that it makes more sense for you to label yourself as gay or straight accordingly, but I would say it is unlikely to change how you feel about guys. It might possibly make you more aware or accepting about how you feel ( or more confused for that matter ) but it doesn't mean your orientation has changed.

Reply 11

Anonymous #2

On the topic of experiementing, i've led a relatively sheltered life when it comes to 'experience' in the sense that i've not had any - what so ever, with either sex!
I'm female and strongly leaning towards bi-sexuality or maybe even lesbian. But I've never had any experience and being as damn shy as I am, I've no idea how I go about getting any.

Does anyone know of any bars or clubs in Manchester that are good for a 'newly' discovered bi-sexual? Or any place where I could meet other bi-sexual or gay people?

Reply 12

Jonatan

13

Anonymous

On the topic of experiementing, i've led a relatively sheltered life when it comes to 'experience' in the sense that i've not had any - what so ever, with either sex!
I'm female and strongly leaning towards bi-sexuality or maybe even lesbian. But I've never had any experience and being as damn shy as I am, I've no idea how I go about getting any.

Does anyone know of any bars or clubs in Manchester that are good for a 'newly' discovered bi-sexual? Or any place where I could meet other bi-sexual or gay people?

I would argue that the LGBT societies on university campuses are probably the best since they will have younger people closer to your age than the overall scene, and it is also a lot more casual environment than a gay club/bar. The gay scene can be quite spectacular, but if you've never been out to anyone else that may be a bit intimidating to you. Many of them will also offer you extensive support dealing with things and many have people who are prepared to or even especially appointed to simply have a friendly chat with you if you worry about things.

Also, if you are not out to people do keep in mind that rumours can travel VERY quickly. I was surprised to find that people I knew from elswhere showed up in the local gay bar. I don't mean to scare you or put you off, but if you think you might have problems with family/friends you may want to keep this in mind.

Reply 13

LordGrace

EURGH. I hate the word bicurious. It makes it sound like you don't have genuine feelings or something. I also think it's *******s to say you've got to have tried it to know. You don't tell a straight virgin girl that they can't like men because they've not shagged one yet, do you, so why say it when referring to another girl?

To original poster: why give it a word? I you're not certain enought o call yourself bisexual yet then just don't. See what happens and figure it out first.

Bicurious... it just sounds insulting. I don't know why. I hate it when people suggest I might just be 'bicurious' what on earth does that mean...

Reply 14

BURRY

Anonymous

Does anyone know of any bars or clubs in Manchester that are good for a 'newly' discovered bi-sexual? Or any place where I could meet other bi-sexual or gay people?

www.okcupid.com
www.lavalife.com
www.thatdatesite.com
www.adultfriendfinder.com

there are literally dozens of sites out there that will help you find someone you may want to experiement with.

perhaps put an ad up in a profile, wait till someone contacts you, let them take you to coffee (to anyone who walks by who knows you, it looks like coffee with a friend) and if you like the person and find them attractive enough, see where it leads?

Reply 15

high priestess fnord

9

BURRY

ive kissed two men in the last month...
both friends on nights out, although it was allright and good fun and games,
i count myself as straight.

um... who else (male) has the gonads to admit they made made out with their mates?

well my bf for one lol and i could name lots lots more but it would be pointless since you dont know them anyway. gay chicken has alot to answer for :p:

and i thought being bi curious was simply to do with curiosity rather than actually knowing that you fancy people of the same gender.

Reply 16

Jonatan

13

BURRY

ive kissed two men in the last month...
both friends on nights out, although it was allright and good fun and games,
i count myself as straight.

um... who else (male) has the gonads to admit they made made out with their mates?

I haven't. They don't want to :frown:

Reply 17

la fille danse

17

Zoecb

Being bicurious is where you think you might enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.
Being bisexual is where you know you enjoy shagging someone of the same sex as you.

I don't think people can know they're bisexual until they're tried it, full sex and all, and liked it. That's why I don't call really myself bisexual as such - I haven't tried it yet. I speculate that I will like it but since I haven't tried I don't really have the authority to say whether or not I am!

Does that mean that virgins can only call themselves "heterocurious," not "heterosexual"?

I knew that I was heterosexual before I ever had sex...

Reply 18

Anonymous #3

BURRY

ive kissed two men in the last month...
both friends on nights out, although it was allright and good fun and games,
i count myself as straight.

um... who else (male) has the gonads to admit they made made out with their mates?

no, i have the gonads to say that i dont....

are you sure you're straight, 2 guys in a month is a lot for a straight bloke....

Reply 19

Anonymous #1

OP

Jonatan

I haven't. They don't want to :frown:

Aww

Anyway thanks for all the replies everyone! It's interesting to hear your opinions on the difference between the terms bi-curious and bisexual :smile:

I'm still confused as to what I am, ah well perhaps I should just persuade myself that I'm (totally) straight and that's it :p:

x

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