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Oh ok thanks! Personally for me it has not been the right time for a relationship so i have tried the whole 'friends with benefits' thing as you have put it... and i cant say it works very well! Feelings definitely come into play from one person of the other, then theres the issue of getting with other people and it ultimately ends in a lot of confusion. I don't think it's worth it.
if i hadnt fallen for my bf i would have to agree that friends with benefits is better than a relationship. damn that love thing getting in the way of my fun lol
Lol love the sig Sarky!
If you keep it "no strings attached" and its just a casual thing then i dont see anything wrong with it
If you keep it "no strings attached" and its just a casual thing then i dont see anything wrong with it
After I split up with my ex, we stayed friends with benefits (yes, I know it kind of defeated the point of splitting up). I broke up with him cos I didn't have feelings for him, but it was still fun to mess around. Problem was, he still loved me, so when I found a new partner I guess he was probably confused. Never mind, he's over it now, happy in another relationship.
But yeah, I'd choose relationships over friends with benefits any day.
But yeah, I'd choose relationships over friends with benefits any day.
After breaking up with my ex that is what I thought I wanted it and have sort of got. Only the whole other people thing does sort of effect it, especially when the lad in question is extremely jealous. It's worth it if you keep feelings out of it and are straight with each other about other people.
I'm this situation, but I really think it's not working.
I broke up with my long term bf in November, then met this other boy a few weeks later at a gig. We both made it clear we didn't want a relationship with each other but ended up sleeping together. And we hang out together when either one of us is bored (we message each other but it's obvious that when one of us is like "wanna come over to hang out tonight?" what that means), but I'm starting to get a bit down if he doesn't text me back or whatever, which at first I didn't give a crap about. I think it's true you can't have no-strings attached sex if it's more than once or twice. Someone always develops some type of feelings.
I need to end that side of it i think although I'd still like to be friends with him, but I can just see us falling into old ways if we go out to a club or something.
Damn.
I broke up with my long term bf in November, then met this other boy a few weeks later at a gig. We both made it clear we didn't want a relationship with each other but ended up sleeping together. And we hang out together when either one of us is bored (we message each other but it's obvious that when one of us is like "wanna come over to hang out tonight?" what that means), but I'm starting to get a bit down if he doesn't text me back or whatever, which at first I didn't give a crap about. I think it's true you can't have no-strings attached sex if it's more than once or twice. Someone always develops some type of feelings.
I need to end that side of it i think although I'd still like to be friends with him, but I can just see us falling into old ways if we go out to a club or something.
Damn.
I always interpreted "friends with benefits" as someone you didn't really like but scrounged off. There's one teacher I do that to.
I thought this thread was gonna be a thatcherite rant about scousers spunging off the state and I'm rather dissappointed it isn't to be honest. Having never allowed myself the luxury of friends or lovers (they carry the microgerms that seek my destruction) I sadly cannot comment on the pros and cons of a meaningful relationship versus screwing your best friend.
It's fine. Good fun even. The whole argument "I couldn't do it incase feelings became involved" is a pretty irrelevant point - one person in a friendship can develop stronger feelings for the other regardless of whether sex is involved. Becoming "friends with benefits" in the first place would suggest that neither person defines emotional relationships through sex (and vice versa) so if one becomes emotionally attached, it won't be because of the sex, the feelings would have developed anyway. Also, the fact that they've had sex with the person won't change the situation that follows at all.
I prefer relationships but friends with benefits are good when a relationship isn't on the cards. But worse that the developing feelings problem is if you don't make it clear to the other person that they are just friends with benefits, they might think you are in a relationship.
in theory it's a great idea..
but someone always gets feelings for the other person.
(usually the girl for the boy)
but someone always gets feelings for the other person.
(usually the girl for the boy)
Always "friends with benefits" I'm rubbish in relationships, I end up getting ... shall we say "distracted". In short, I want it all and I want it now. Hoever it does cause problems when you both go out together and everyone asks "whats going on between you two?" and annother problem is when one ends up falling for the other, but thats when you walk away.
Im in a happy relationship (17 months) and the idea of sleeping with a friend doesnt appeal to me in any way, shape or form (even if i was single). I just know i would get possessive over them and get upset if they had other people. But then again, i dont think i have the self confidence...maybe if i did....
Im not a prude or anything (im all up for sex in a loving relationship) but casual sex just seems a bit...i dunno, cheap i guess. Plus the fact that i only started to enjoy sex with my bf when i had fallen in love with him.
Im not a prude or anything (im all up for sex in a loving relationship) but casual sex just seems a bit...i dunno, cheap i guess. Plus the fact that i only started to enjoy sex with my bf when i had fallen in love with him.
I think it can work as long as you're both 100% happy with it but like other people have been saying, it's so easy for one person to get more caught up in it than the other.
the worst thing I did last year was to convince myself that a friends with benefits relationship was the next best thing to a relationship with the guy I liked. I ended up getting badly hurt with that one, but in general terms it's a nice arrangement
the worst thing I did last year was to convince myself that a friends with benefits relationship was the next best thing to a relationship with the guy I liked. I ended up getting badly hurt with that one, but in general terms it's a nice arrangement
I thought FWB with be awesome and the perfect situation for having fun with no strings attached. Having gone through it, it's not that great because you kinda start wondering if you're being used and also, feelings did develop from the other side and then I said "no" to going further but right now we're still friends with benefits... :s
I have considered it previously, but have thought against it on my part. I am a very emotional person, so would likely end up getting hust in some shape or form, and ive had enough of that from relationships.
Also, i am a very sensitive person, and don't enjoy sex anywhere near as much on a one night stand (did it once for the experience) as i do while in a relationship, but thats a personal thing.
Also, i am a very sensitive person, and don't enjoy sex anywhere near as much on a one night stand (did it once for the experience) as i do while in a relationship, but thats a personal thing.
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