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Am I being stupid?
I'm not sure how long this is going to be, and I apologise if it doesn't make much sense.
About 5 months ago I started talking to a guy on msn who I met through someone I met on holiday, and he's from Turkey. I know what most peoples reaction to this is, which is "somethings wrong with that, he obviously only wants one thing i.e he's taking advantage or something", and that would have been my first reaction if I'd heard about this. But it's different, we seem to get on really well! He's 21 years old, he speaks pretty good English, and my Turkish has improved since I've been talking to him. He hasn't kept himself to himself, as in, he's sent me photos of his mum and dad and other family members and I have his best friends msn address as well as his cousins (who is a girl) who lives in London. He went away with his family for a month over xmas, and he text me at least every 2/3 days which gave me the impression he actually does like me as a friend :-) Am I being stupid as to think that this is possible? That we can actually be friends?
Also, this may be slightly silly. I've always wanted to go to visit Istanbul, just because of it history and how amazing it looks. From meeting this guy, I've got even more of an insentive to go now. I know this could be a stupid idea, but I'm going to uni later on this year, and he's going into the army(it's compulsory in Turkey) and I just think, if I don't go this year, I'll might miss that oppotunity of meeting a good friend. If we did meet, at least then when he goes into the army, we'd both know whether it would be worthwhile keeping in touch.
One minute I think this is a good friendship and I shouldn't care what other people might think, then I think, am I just being really immature?
what do people think?
thanks,
x
About 5 months ago I started talking to a guy on msn who I met through someone I met on holiday, and he's from Turkey. I know what most peoples reaction to this is, which is "somethings wrong with that, he obviously only wants one thing i.e he's taking advantage or something", and that would have been my first reaction if I'd heard about this. But it's different, we seem to get on really well! He's 21 years old, he speaks pretty good English, and my Turkish has improved since I've been talking to him. He hasn't kept himself to himself, as in, he's sent me photos of his mum and dad and other family members and I have his best friends msn address as well as his cousins (who is a girl) who lives in London. He went away with his family for a month over xmas, and he text me at least every 2/3 days which gave me the impression he actually does like me as a friend :-) Am I being stupid as to think that this is possible? That we can actually be friends?
Also, this may be slightly silly. I've always wanted to go to visit Istanbul, just because of it history and how amazing it looks. From meeting this guy, I've got even more of an insentive to go now. I know this could be a stupid idea, but I'm going to uni later on this year, and he's going into the army(it's compulsory in Turkey) and I just think, if I don't go this year, I'll might miss that oppotunity of meeting a good friend. If we did meet, at least then when he goes into the army, we'd both know whether it would be worthwhile keeping in touch.
One minute I think this is a good friendship and I shouldn't care what other people might think, then I think, am I just being really immature?
what do people think?
thanks,
x
Scroll to see replies
If you do like this guy then obviously you're going to want to meet up, and if you wanted to go to Istanbul anyway then it probably makes sense. However take precautions as you have never met before and it is easy to fool someone over the internet. I wouldn't suggest going by yourself or anywhere too quiet. Also you perhaps should consider how he feels towards you and whether he just wants to be friends too.
its alright meeting up-- just go with a friend though - don't go alone -- always have just a little bit of paranoia coz you haven't met him before - that way you are still alert
Erm... if she 'met him on holiday' then I'm assuming she has met him in real life :]
ginjew
Relationships online are bad bad bad! It's ok to talk to someone you dont know online, but unless you have absolute SOLID proof of his existence. Be safe. Too many girls get screwed up this way.
I'm 100% sure he is who he says he is, as I've seen him on webcam(when I say that it always sounds a bit weird to me, and I'd like to say that it's not weird or rude or anything in anyway) and on webcam with his bestfriend as well, who I do talk to. Also as I said, I talk to his cousin in London and have seen her on webcam sa well.
And the thing is, I don't think any of my friends'll want to come. Most of them are going away in the summer at least once, if not twice, and so would be too expensive for them to go with me. I don't know what to do really
x x
nope, can't get a visa
x
x
ginjew
oh good maybe im not that big of a tard then!!
Oooh, sorry for being (incorrectly) know-it-all-ish
Anonymous
I'm 100% sure he is who he says he is, as I've seen him on webcam(when I say that it always sounds a bit weird to me, and I'd like to say that it's not weird or rude or anything in anyway) and on webcam with his bestfriend as well, who I do talk to. Also as I said, I talk to his cousin in London and have seen her on webcam sa well.
And the thing is, I don't think any of my friends'll want to come. Most of them are going away in the summer at least once, if not twice, and so would be too expensive for them to go with me. I don't know what to do really
x x
And the thing is, I don't think any of my friends'll want to come. Most of them are going away in the summer at least once, if not twice, and so would be too expensive for them to go with me. I don't know what to do really
x x
well then, u just have to think really hard about this. its ur decision and im sure ul make the best one for urself
i still think that its not advisable to go alone like that
i think you should find someone to go with - if you can't, find another holiday time where someone is free and then go -- better go prepared rather than in a rush -- i'm sure he will understand
i think you should find someone to go with - if you can't, find another holiday time where someone is free and then go -- better go prepared rather than in a rush -- i'm sure he will understand
I'm sure he would understand and I completely understand that it would be silly to go by myself. I had a word to a friend today about her coming as well(she wants to stay somewhere with an outdoor pool in the middle of a city ) but..at the same time, I'm off to uni and he's going into the army later this year and after that he won't be back in Ist until...Feb 09
x x
and I completely understand that it would be silly to go by myself. I had a word to a friend today about her coming as well(she wants to stay somewhere with an outdoor pool in the middle of a city ) but..at the same time, I'm off to uni and he's going into the army later this year and after that he won't be back in Ist until...Feb 09 x x
ahh - i see your dilemma, but then either you go with a friend or don't go at all. As you said, he will understand
and also, since you are starting uni and all, you will gradually become pre-occupied with work and such, and he will be occupied with his army duties - the time will fly -- and not only that, but i am sure that he can write to you at least.
Just be patient -- everything happens for a reason
and also, since you are starting uni and all, you will gradually become pre-occupied with work and such, and he will be occupied with his army duties - the time will fly -- and not only that, but i am sure that he can write to you at least.
Just be patient
-- everything happens for a reason
i dont mean to be cynical/pessimistic but there are a lot of people in istanbul who go around 'grooming' tourists, trying to marry them so they can come to england. i know this for a fact, its not myth or xenophobia ive seen it happening so just be aware of this. istanbul can also be dangerous, especially outside of the main tourist district at night. just be aware of this. i wouldnt go on your own.
on the plus side its an amazing city, and truly worlds apart from western europe. if you travel deep over the river away from the tourist zone there are some truly crazy places. just be careful!
on the plus side its an amazing city, and truly worlds apart from western europe. if you travel deep over the river away from the tourist zone there are some truly crazy places. just be careful!
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