Women of TSR: Do you feel like you get harassed?
It amazed me ever since I met my fiancee how different it is to be a woman in today's society - it makes it feel like us men get it easy.
Now I'm not the one to align with feminists - the typical ones I notice are the loud mouths who claim that all men are bad and pick up the smallest statistical imbalances to try and claim there's a problem, but I have increasingly seen that in today's society how a lot of men have increasingly (or maybe they always have) become entitled perverts. Perhaps that's a large claim and maybe it's over-exaggerated, but if my fiancee can't walk to a bus stop without a whistle, a creepy homeless man complimenting her whilst I am there with her, or even straight up scary photos being taken without permission, then I think there's something wrong with our society right now.
I've been observing this myself for a while now, and now after reading another woman's view from the guardian (really interesting opinion) it feels like it's worthy of some kind of debate.
Now I feel like there are some caveats, it's 'culture' or even 'instinct' I assume for men to chase women, or be the one to approach. But why does this need to be something a woman has to deal with in everyday life, especially in very creepy scenarios.
I think it could be partly blamed to the growing 'LAD' (urgh) culture where guys think all women are fine with them being harassed because 'they are just one of the lads' or 'it's banter' (puke). Or perhaps it's the fact that people are insecure, mentally unwell or feel hopeless so it's their 'last resort'. Or maybe we are losing part of our traditional values due to too much 'new age' feminism so the respect for proper relationships is dwindling.
So women of TSR - do you feel like you get harassed a lot (in person or online)? Is there some kind of problem here?
I'd hate to feel as if I could not walk even around by home or work without expecting harassment - especially when you never know what people are capable of these days (too many rape stories in the news for example).
Now I'm not the one to align with feminists - the typical ones I notice are the loud mouths who claim that all men are bad and pick up the smallest statistical imbalances to try and claim there's a problem, but I have increasingly seen that in today's society how a lot of men have increasingly (or maybe they always have) become entitled perverts. Perhaps that's a large claim and maybe it's over-exaggerated, but if my fiancee can't walk to a bus stop without a whistle, a creepy homeless man complimenting her whilst I am there with her, or even straight up scary photos being taken without permission, then I think there's something wrong with our society right now.
I've been observing this myself for a while now, and now after reading another woman's view from the guardian (really interesting opinion) it feels like it's worthy of some kind of debate.
Now I feel like there are some caveats, it's 'culture' or even 'instinct' I assume for men to chase women, or be the one to approach. But why does this need to be something a woman has to deal with in everyday life, especially in very creepy scenarios.
I think it could be partly blamed to the growing 'LAD' (urgh) culture where guys think all women are fine with them being harassed because 'they are just one of the lads' or 'it's banter' (puke). Or perhaps it's the fact that people are insecure, mentally unwell or feel hopeless so it's their 'last resort'. Or maybe we are losing part of our traditional values due to too much 'new age' feminism so the respect for proper relationships is dwindling.
So women of TSR - do you feel like you get harassed a lot (in person or online)? Is there some kind of problem here?
I'd hate to feel as if I could not walk even around by home or work without expecting harassment - especially when you never know what people are capable of these days (too many rape stories in the news for example).
(edited 8 years ago)
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I get a couple of people message me asking for a blowjob.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
I get a couple of people message me asking for a blowjob.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Can i have a blowjob?
Original post by Lord Samosa
Can i have a blowjob?
Sorry dude - fully booked for the month
Original post by Lord Samosa
Can i have a blowjob?
Get on the swings and roundabouts first smh
I get harassed regularly. It's normally sexual remarks, wolf whistles, rude gestures...etc. It's very annoying and degrading. I wish that people would leave me alone. I always feel unsafe and nervous when someone harasses me, and I shouldn't have to feel anxious about walking around in case someone decides to say or do something to me.
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by G-mute1995
I get harassed regularly. It's normally sexual remarks, wolf whistles, rude gestures...etc. It's very annoying and degrading. I wish that people would leave me alone. I always feel unsafe and nervous when someone harasses me, and I shouldn't have to feel anxious about walking around in case someone decides to say or do something to me.
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
I'm sorry to hear all that, the fact that the guy actually started running after you is especially creepy. What I find disturbing is not just about how bad the events are, but how frequent they happen. To be at the point where you are scared to even walk around outside is what I think a huge problem with today's society.
Do you think there's any solution to it?
Original post by Xiggie
Hey,
I haven't had any problems with harassment on TSR, everyone has actually been really polite and helpful... so far!
IRL I do get a lot of harassment from random strangers -_-; If that's what you're asking about anyways.
I haven't had any problems with harassment on TSR, everyone has actually been really polite and helpful... so far!
IRL I do get a lot of harassment from random strangers -_-; If that's what you're asking about anyways.
I meant to make it more about real life and not just on TSR - I'll edit the OP to make that slightly clearer!
Original post by G-mute1995
I get harassed regularly. It's normally sexual remarks, wolf whistles, rude gestures...etc. It's very annoying and degrading. I wish that people would leave me alone. I always feel unsafe and nervous when someone harasses me, and I shouldn't have to feel anxious about walking around in case someone decides to say or do something to me.
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
A few years ago when I was 16, a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
I've had similar experiences whilst away on holiday :/ for example in Turkey, men would come up to me, grab me, touch my hair, try and drag me off to get pictures with them or their shop or whatever, ask to be my boyfriend or husband.. follow me... And if I didn't respond to their 'compliments' they'd hurl abuse at me. Not really my ideal holiday destination.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
I get a couple of people message me asking for a blowjob.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
That must be infuriating, if I were you I'd give them a right mouthful.
Maybe you should spend less time in the playground if this is what happens every time. Perverts these days get younger and younger.
Original post by GuppyFox
I'm sorry to hear all that, the fact that the guy actually started running after you is especially creepy. What I find disturbing is not just about how bad the events are, but how frequent they happen. To be at the point where you are scared to even walk around outside is what I think a huge problem with today's society.
Do you think there's any solution to it?
Do you think there's any solution to it?
Report it to the police.
Challenge the idea as often as possible that its "ok" to approach strange women in the street.
You'll find plenty of idiots on TSR who would defend their right to harass women.
Original post by GuppyFox
I've been observing this myself for a while now, and now after reading another woman's view from the guardian (really interesting opinion)
What a poor article tbh. The first person she encountered was clearly mentally ill and should be dealt with as such.
The second guy simply asked her name.
Somebody PMed me a while ago asking if I'd wear the Halloween costume I'm wearing in one of my pictures, go over to his, handcuff him and scratch his face till he came.
Still not sure who felt more harassed, me or him when I said no.
Still not sure who felt more harassed, me or him when I said no.
Original post by GuppyFox
I'm sorry to hear all that, the fact that the guy actually started running after you is especially creepy. What I find disturbing is not just about how bad the events are, but how frequent they happen. To be at the point where you are scared to even walk around outside is what I think a huge problem with today's society.
Do you think there's any solution to it?
Do you think there's any solution to it?
I don't think there's a solution to it. Creeps and perverts will always be around. It's not something that people take seriously, unless you've experienced it yourself. I feel as though some guys (and women) think it's a trivial issue. Some people tend to believe that the victim is to blame. That kind of attitude is archaic and ignorant. I don't think anything will change anytime soon. As I get older, the harassment gets more frequent.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by GuppyFox
I meant to make it more about real life and not just on TSR - I'll edit the OP to make that slightly clearer!
Aha! Thanks for clearing that up, I may just be a little dense XD
I find that, as someone who wears 'alternative' clothing, I get a lot of harassment whenever I leave the house - I'm not sure how this might compare to someone who wears more mainstream clothing or if there is in fact any difference.
It's a bit of an ordeal really having people feeling that it's okay to pass comment on my appearance loudly, shout at me that I'm a prostitute etc, laugh at me, yell at me from cars, wolf whistles etc. Also I find that when dressed in something different to the norm I'm not treated as an equal, people seem to feel entitled to come up and touch my clothes or my hair.
After one incident in a pub where a group of 'lads' lifted up my friends dress I've pretty much sworn off going out late at night, it's honestly not worth the hassle.
Unfortunately I have lots of other examples similar to that too.
Original post by GuppyFox
It amazed me ever since I met my fiancee how different it is to be a woman in today's society - it makes it feel like us men get it easy.
Now I'm not the one to align with feminists - the typical ones I notice are the loud mouths who claim that all men are bad and pick up the smallest statistical imbalances to try and claim there's a problem, but1. I have increasingly seen that in today's society how a lot of men have increasingly (or maybe they always have) become entitled perverts. Perhaps that's a large claim and maybe it's over-exaggerated, but if 2.my fiancee can't walk to a bus stop without a whistle, 3.a creepy homeless man complimenting her whilst I am there with her, or even 4.straight up scary photos being taken without permission, then I think there's something wrong with our society right now.
I've been observing this myself for a while now, and now after reading another woman's view from the guardian (really interesting opinion) it feels like it's worthy of some kind of debate.
Now I feel like there are some caveats, it's 'culture' or even 'instinct' I assume for men to chase women, or be the one to approach. But why does this need to be something a woman has to deal with in everyday life, especially in very 5.creepy scenarios.
6.I think it could be partly blamed to the growing 'LAD' (urgh) culture where guys think all women are fine with them being harassed because 'they are just one of the lads' or 'it's banter' (puke). Or perhaps it's the fact that people are insecure, mentally unwell or feel hopeless so it's their 'last resort'.7. Or maybe we are losing part of our traditional values due to too much 'new age' feminism so the respect for proper relationships is dwindling.
So women of TSR - do you feel like you get harassed a lot (in person or online)? Is there some kind of problem here?
I'd hate to feel as if I could not walk even around by home or work without expecting harassment - especially when you never know what people are capable of these days (too many rape stories in the news for example).
Now I'm not the one to align with feminists - the typical ones I notice are the loud mouths who claim that all men are bad and pick up the smallest statistical imbalances to try and claim there's a problem, but1. I have increasingly seen that in today's society how a lot of men have increasingly (or maybe they always have) become entitled perverts. Perhaps that's a large claim and maybe it's over-exaggerated, but if 2.my fiancee can't walk to a bus stop without a whistle, 3.a creepy homeless man complimenting her whilst I am there with her, or even 4.straight up scary photos being taken without permission, then I think there's something wrong with our society right now.
I've been observing this myself for a while now, and now after reading another woman's view from the guardian (really interesting opinion) it feels like it's worthy of some kind of debate.
Now I feel like there are some caveats, it's 'culture' or even 'instinct' I assume for men to chase women, or be the one to approach. But why does this need to be something a woman has to deal with in everyday life, especially in very 5.creepy scenarios.
6.I think it could be partly blamed to the growing 'LAD' (urgh) culture where guys think all women are fine with them being harassed because 'they are just one of the lads' or 'it's banter' (puke). Or perhaps it's the fact that people are insecure, mentally unwell or feel hopeless so it's their 'last resort'.7. Or maybe we are losing part of our traditional values due to too much 'new age' feminism so the respect for proper relationships is dwindling.
So women of TSR - do you feel like you get harassed a lot (in person or online)? Is there some kind of problem here?
I'd hate to feel as if I could not walk even around by home or work without expecting harassment - especially when you never know what people are capable of these days (too many rape stories in the news for example).
1. I am sorry but without data you are just another person with an opinion.
2. Any evidence all those whistles are directed at her?
3. What exactly makes the man creepy? Creepy is a subjective term. Besides, complimenting someone is not necessarily a negative action. Indeed, it is the action of saying nice things about some of your intellectual or physical traits.
4. Look at Youtube. You will see many videos taken of people (both male and female) without their permission. Hell, the government takes videos of people without their permission. I haven't seen you complain about it.
5. Again, you need to define creepy before you use it.
6. The idea that, if there is harassment it is because a growing culture is ridiculous. Either there is no harassment (which I don't think is the case) or there is but it has always been here. I bet my money on the second case.
7. Another ridiculous claim. What exactly is a traditional value? Values come and go. We mostly call it social progress. Whether you like social progress or not is another matter.
There is certainly a case to make about the harassment suffered by women. But you have not made it.
Original post by XxSophie01xX
I get a couple of people message me asking for a blowjob.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Eh, swings and roundabouts.
Time to block those numbers (and those people) from your contacts (and your life).
Original post by G-mute1995
1.I get harassed regularly. It's normally sexual remarks, wolf whistles, rude gestures...etc. It's very annoying and degrading. I wish that people would leave me alone. I always feel unsafe and nervous when someone harasses me, and I shouldn't have to feel anxious about walking around in case someone decides to say or do something to me.
A few years ago when I was 16, 2.a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. 3.On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
A few years ago when I was 16, 2.a man followed me around a flee market when I was on holiday. He asked for my number, I ignored him. He proceeded to follow me. I started running and he started running after me. I managed to lose him, but that experience was really scary for me. 3.On that same vacation a man grabbed my arm and tried to kiss me. Things like this are unacceptable, but I feel like they are not taken seriously.
It's not flattering at all, I think it's incredibly embarrassing. It makes me feel like an object.
Posted from TSR Mobile
1. Do you take evidence (photo/video) and report it to the police?
2. Didn't you cry for help?
3. I am guessing this was not the UK. See point 1
You need to take action. Be the change you want to see in the world.
Original post by GuppyFox
I'm sorry to hear all that, the fact that the guy actually started running after you is especially creepy. What I find disturbing is not just about how bad the events are, but 1.how frequent they happen. To be at the point where you are scared to even walk around outside is what I think a huge problem with today's society.
Do you think there's any solution to it?
Do you think there's any solution to it?
1. Any sources to back up that claim?
Original post by Xiggie
Its just a fact, anyone can go online and claim they get harassed, only an idiot would believe it
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