uni house - feeling depressed about situation

Ok I need help!
I'm 18 and female. Next year I'm sharing a house with 4 other people (it will be my 2nd yr of uni). At the moment I hang around in a group of 10, most of who I live with in halls now. When it came to look for houses we naturally split up in groups, 5 on each side.

At the beginning i was quite happy with who I'm living with but I'm starting to have problems with 2 girls (the other 2 are guys and I get on really well with them). I didnt know one of them that well (we'll call her Mary) but I didnt dislike her at the time. The other one (Cath) I used to be good friends with.

But I dont know whats going on! Lately I've just been having clashes with both of them and im now dreading moving in next year. Mary is arrogant and rude to me alot of the time and nitpicks about everything. For example, she had a bad cold once and I was trying to be nice to her so I said something like "i hope you feel better soon" and the next day she twisted what i said and had a go at me. Apparently I'd said "i hope you get better" which she thought implied she wouldnt at all. She was really rude to me about this and it annoyed me. What a thing to start an argument about! She also tries to intimidate me in the group and comments on everything I do (ie body language etc). Its so annoying.

Shes also very free in her morals and sleeps around. I'm the total opposite and next yr I'll have to have the room next to her which I'm worried about. In short she just really irritates me and I feel victimised by her.

Cath is good friends with this girl. She used to be close with me but lately shes just been irritating. Shes very highly strung and stresses out about everything. If i drop a pen or something on the floor and leave it, she'll have a go at me for being lazy (even if the pen is in my room!). I'm very laid back and now Im worrying. Whats gonna happen if i leave something lying around the house? She'll go mad. Im sick of her moaning and having a go at me for just being me.

I know that the other 2 guys feel the same as I do about Cath because she moans at everyone, but they love Mary - because she puts on an act and is very good at getting on with men.

I dont want to live with these girls next year but I dont know what to do. We've signed for the house (we did that ages ago) and I'm stuck with it. Its making me feel quite depressed what do you think i should do?

Although I don't really see how her sleeping around is any of your business. Surely it's nothing to do with you if she brings guys back to her room? It's not like she's looking for a threesome.

Haha i certainly hope shes not looking for a threesome!

I dont mean it in that way, Im not judging her or anything, shes just extremely loud when she has sex with them (and if im in the room next to her I dont really want to hear it). She also likes very odd types ( think very big, hairy, pierced and tattooed etc) and I dont like the idea of not knowing who's in my house. She could be bringing anyone back

Ah ok I get it now. In that case I suggest you invest in a padlock for you door.

How's this for a plan - you buy a little tape recorder and record the sounds of her primitive men's mating calls and other sex noises they may be making. Then, the next day, you play back the sounds to her.

This humiliating experience would make her feel **** and violate any sort of natural rights she may have (if those things do indeed exist).
However, it may also motivate her to be more discreet at future moments of copulation.


Hm. Have just re-read what I wrote. I am the housemate from hell.

Tell her shes being a bitch and if she doesn't change her ways you will make her life living hell.

I did this when the boys I live with tried to bully me into submission (I'm the only girl and as they sublet to me I'm not named on the lease so they think they can push me about). Seriously you can do little things to annoy the **** out of her. For instance-

During her loud sex push a small note under her door saying in capital letters. SHUT THE **** UP! I DONT WANT TO HEAR YOU SHAGGING A DIFFERENT BLOKE FOR THE FIFTH NIGHT RUNNING! SOME OF US NEED TO SLEEP! The guy she's shagging will NOT be impressed that she's so loose and if she's got any self-respect she'll be embarassed. If not that's still annoying.

Alternatively place EVERYTHING valuable in your room and all knives and weapons one night after shes gone out. Then when she can't find them in the morning say, It's fine for you to sleep around Mary, but I need to sleep at night, so I thought I'd make sure everything was secure before you brought strangers round and I went to sleep. This way no one can get stabbed and we'll still have a tv in the morning *BIG SMILE*

Take the lid off her toothpaste, shampoo, shower gel and anything else in bottles in the bathroom. Don't use any. Just take the lid off.

Leave a post it pad by your bedroom door for Cath. This way she never has to enter your room, even when you're out and she wants something, she can leave a note for when you get back or next open the door.

Call Mary Lassie. Say she howls like a dog during sex. Proceed to howl over the breakfast table.

Buy ALL the needed cleaning products and make it clear you have them when you move in by carrying them in a clear case for cleaning. Then keep them in your room. Don't ever let Cath use them. When she asks why state that She doesn't like your level of cleaning and thinks you're lazy so you figured you'd keep your cleaning stuff for when the whim takes you and she can do it the rest of the time.

Play d n b solidly for 5 hours. Then everyone will understand what it's like to be pissed off by someone else. Then sit them down to discuss what annoys each other and come up with solutions. If people don't cooperate play some more. The llama song also works effectively for this in my experience. As does Eminem.

Bake cookies and ice them with everyones name. Misspell Cath and Mary, I'm thinking Kath and Marie. Then it looks like an innocent mistake.


Man, I'm bloody evil. No one crosses me.