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My girlfriend told me she wants to try lesbian sex. We're in LDR. watch

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    So, first some context:
    - I'm 23 and my girlfriend is 20;
    - We've been together for 6 months while I was studying abroad, lived together most of that time;
    - It wasn't even an option to end the relationship for us since we are in deep love, so we've been doing LDR since I came back to my country 2 months ago;
    - We've been skyping 90% of the days since I left and text all the time;

    So, she has always had this fantasy of being with a girl, though she told me in some occasions that she thinks it would be awkward a 3-way with a girl since she wouldn't feel comfortable with me having sex with another girl, even if she's there. I have mixed feelings about she doing it. I mean, I guess that every-guy fantasy of witnessing lesbian sex comes into play here. But I'm not 100% sure if I'd be ok with my girlfriend having sex with another girl, specialy if I can't be there.

    On the other hand, even though we love each other, we're young and I don't want to prevent her from fulfilling her fantasies. We've talked about all of this, and she told me it's not like she has urges and she really really wants to do it. But she's curious and would like to give it a shot so she asked me how I feel about it. She also told me our relationship is way too important for her, so she would never do anything to hurt me.

    Even though it turns me on the idea of having a threesome with my girlfriend and another girl, if it's just my girlfriend and the girl without me, somehow the excitment turns into doubt.

    So, I would like your opinion about the following:

    Is this selfishness, the fact that a threesome with a girl turns me on but if it's just my girlfriend and another girl I'm not so comfortable with it?

    She told me she would never play on the lesbo team, she really is just curious. How often would a girl start developing lesbian desires after a first time with another girl, even if her mindset is just fulfilling a fantasy at the time. In other words, what are the chances of her starting to turn lesbian?
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    Bad idea.
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    I wouldn't want my partner to have sex with another man, not because it might "turn him gay", but simply because I wouldn't be comfortable with the thought of him being intimate with another person.
    I might be attracted to to other people (male and female), and have fantasies about them but I'd never act on these thoughts and I'd expect him to do the same.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Is this selfishness, the fact that a threesome with a girl turns me on but if it's just my girlfriend and another girl I'm not so comfortable with it?
    I don't think it's selfish, it's natural for a guy.
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    I know it's been said already, but for me, being in a relationship means that I want exclusivity. I couldn't stand the thought of my boyfriend being intimate with anyone else and I know that he feels the same way about me.

    Also, she says that she wouldn't feel comfortable having a threesome because she doesn't want to see you being intimate with someone else, but she doesn't think you should have a problem with her having sex with someone else. How is that fair???
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    I second the poster above me, how is it okay for her to sleep with someone else but not for you to have a threesome? I understand the logic but I kind of think that if she is really happy with you then she won't regret not having sex with a girl in the future
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    In b4 you give her the a-okay and whilst experimenting with a girl she 'accidentally' slips onto a **** who just so 'happens' to be there with them whoops

    not that you'll ever find out anyway since she is experimenting with 'girls'
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    If you don't agree maybe she will just do it anyway? Different people would feel different about it personally I would be bothered not just because of feelings involved but because women are often better at pleasing each other so it may make her think less of you in bed.
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    How the hell can you be in "deep love" with somebody within 6 months?




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    Your sentiment seems pretty normal to me, and there's no way I'd sign off on a partner getting up to funky business with another girl in my absence :whip:
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    I have to agree with all of the above and even though she says she wouldn't "play on the lesbo team" (great phrase btw) as someone who was once only curious myself, I wouldn't rule out a relationship with the right woman now, especially now knowing what women can do (and that seemingly men can't!).
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    (Original post by Bex94)
    I wouldn't rule out a relationship with the right woman now, especially now knowing what women can do (and that seemingly men can't!).
    Some men can! And those who can't (or perhaps won't) miss out.

    The OP's girlfriend and yourself are I am sure not alone in having the thoughts you have. If a recent survey is representative, about 1 in 4 young people consider their sexuality to be fluid in some way.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So, first some context:
    - I'm 23 and my girlfriend is 20;
    - We've been together for 6 months while I was studying abroad, lived together most of that time;
    - It wasn't even an option to end the relationship for us since we are in deep love, so we've been doing LDR since I came back to my country 2 months ago;
    - We've been skyping 90% of the days since I left and text all the time;

    So, she has always had this fantasy of being with a girl, though she told me in some occasions that she thinks it would be awkward a 3-way with a girl since she wouldn't feel comfortable with me having sex with another girl, even if she's there. I have mixed feelings about she doing it. I mean, I guess that every-guy fantasy of witnessing lesbian sex comes into play here. But I'm not 100% sure if I'd be ok with my girlfriend having sex with another girl, specialy if I can't be there.

    On the other hand, even though we love each other, we're young and I don't want to prevent her from fulfilling her fantasies. We've talked about all of this, and she told me it's not like she has urges and she really really wants to do it. But she's curious and would like to give it a shot so she asked me how I feel about it. She also told me our relationship is way too important for her, so she would never do anything to hurt me.

    Even though it turns me on the idea of having a threesome with my girlfriend and another girl, if it's just my girlfriend and the girl without me, somehow the excitment turns into doubt.

    So, I would like your opinion about the following:

    Is this selfishness, the fact that a threesome with a girl turns me on but if it's just my girlfriend and another girl I'm not so comfortable with it?

    She told me she would never play on the lesbo team, she really is just curious. How often would a girl start developing lesbian desires after a first time with another girl, even if her mindset is just fulfilling a fantasy at the time. In other words, what are the chances of her starting to turn lesbian?
    Man you seriously need to reconsider your entire life, what kind of lame beta male lets their gf **** other people, male or female?

    Man your girl literally has no respect for you if she's even talking to you about this ****. What a ****ing whore.. I'd either run a million miles or come down hard on this stupid *****
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    Yeh, Being your average guy, I've always had this fantasy of having sex with girls too. Sex is still sex. If you do not like it then do not give in to this.
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    I agree with many in this post - bad idea. Intimacy is for the relationship, if she experiences it with others separate to you how would you feel? what if she becomes emotionally attached to the girl? I believe you should think long and hard.
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    My advice to you is that if she opens up that can of worms you have about 90% chance that you continue to want to do this if she has not already while you were gone if she loves you she would never do a thing unless you were there I have already lost two relationships and a marriage to no trust you can't say no to this and you can't say yes to this you just tell her you do what you have to do and see where this takes you
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    (Original post by Riddle1929)
    My advice to you is that if she opens up that can of worms you have about 90% chance that you continue to want to do this if she has not already while you were gone if she loves you she would never do a thing unless you were there I have already lost two relationships and a marriage to no trust you can't say no to this and you can't say yes to this you just tell her you do what you have to do and see where this takes you
    This thread was started in September 2015. I think one way or another the ship has sailed.
 
 
 
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