The Student Room Group

Why is it considered "insecure" to compliment other girls on how they look?

me and my friends do this all the time, sometimes i'm nice to other girls too and ask where someone got her henna done or whatever. i dont like cattiness/being a bitch

However my sister and brother say it makes me seem "insecure." I dont see how though I'm just being nice?? :confused::confused:
Well that's the first time I've heard of that perspective on complimenting people. I think so long as you don't make a habit of doing it constantly it won't come across that way. But to compliment someone occasionally doesn't show insecurity, personally.
Reply 2
There's nothing insecure about it, unless you're being insincere when giving the compliments.
theyre just jelly

But really, being nice to girls all the time can make you out to seem a little desperate
Reply 4
Original post by somethingbeautiful
Well that's the first time I've heard of that perspective on complimenting people. I think so long as you don't make a habit of doing it constantly it won't come across that way. But to compliment someone occasionally doesn't show insecurity, personally.


Yeah, its not like I constantly compliment anyone, I'm just being nice :dontknow:

Kittyboy
theyre just jelly

But really, being nice to girls all the time can make you out to seem a little desperate


I'm a girl myself sorry I dont have the gender symbol next to my avi :smile:

MissJGB
There's nothing insecure about it, unless you're being insincere when giving the compliments.


I'm not no. I think I'm just being friendly.. but my siblings say it seems insecure?
(edited 8 years ago)
Be nice to girls, be nice to everyone. If someone tells you that you being nice all the time is a sign of "insecurity" or whatever, ignore them. Share the love because people will appreciate it.
Original post by Bengali


I'm a girl myself sorry I dont have the gender symbol next to my avi :smile:


And that makes a difference how? You may just be a lesbian or are trying really hard to make friends. People like that are just perceived as insecure suck-ups.
Reply 7
Original post by BookBird
Be nice to girls, be nice to everyone. If someone tells you that you being nice all the time is a sign of "insecurity" or whatever, ignore them. Share the love because people will appreciate it.


Yeah exactly lol. There are definitely some girls/guys who fish for compliments by putting themselves down all the time but this isn't exactly that

My sister/brother don't socialise as much tbf

Kittyboy
And that makes a difference how? You may just be a lesbian or are trying really hard to make friends. People like that are just perceived as insecure suck-ups.


How old are you? lmao
Original post by Bengali

How old are you? lmao


17, old enough to know how cruel people judge v: Compliments are nice, just don't over do it.
Original post by Bengali
me and my friends do this all the time, sometimes i'm nice to other girls too and ask where someone got her henna done or whatever. i dont like cattiness/being a bitch

However my sister and brother say it makes me seem "insecure." I dont see how though I'm just being nice?? :confused::confused:


Maybe it's how you do it, they think you sound like a suck up?
They're jealous you're not complimenting them.
I compliment people but I don't understand what's bad about being nice to someone and telling them they look pretty, it's nice to appreciate beauty. Some people may think that if you don't compliment someone, you may be insecure too

Posted from TSR Mobile
Reply 12
Original post by Mankytoes
Maybe it's how you do it, they think you sound like a suck up?


Yeah possibly, all I say is something like "I like your henna, did you get it done at X?" though :dontknow:

Then again they think my best friend's "too nice" though and she's not super friendly either

RainbowKiwi
They're jealous you're not complimenting them.


lol

My siblings are more into cliques etc than I am, I'm the oldest in the family

TheGreatImposter
I compliment people but I don't understand what's bad about being nice to someone and telling them they look pretty, it's nice to appreciate beauty. Some people may think that if you don't compliment someone, you may be insecure too


Exactly. Its not like I'm fishing for compliments myself or something

How does not complimenting people come off as insecure either? SMH some people will label anything :nope:
(edited 8 years ago)
Well if my facebook feed and people at my school are anything to go by girls seem to compliment each other all the time. This is the first I've heard about it being seen as a bad thing. Hell complimenting girls' selfies seems to be nearly mandatory...
It isn't. This the first I've heard of it.

It sounds like jealousy on their part.
don't listen to them, it's nice to compliment other girls, especially since people like to pit girls against each other, be kind!


Posted from TSR Mobile
If they say you're insecure they might think your compliments are asskissing. Like, "nice shoes; be my friend."
Not saying you are this way but that's a way to rationalise what your siblings say.
Probably because, from a guys perspective, it seems to be compensation and over niceness covering up a deep sense of bitchy competitiveness and yes, possible insecurity. It can be patronising too, but even when it isn't it rings a bit fake. Unless the woman really genuinely ikes that woman, is friends, and it does in a more understated way, it just comes off wrong.

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending