Please give me some advice

Hello everyone, first time I've posted in this section of TSR. I've never had a boyfriend before, and the day after Valentine's, whilst on MSN being depressed and just talking to my friends I decided to tell this boy that I really like him. After I did this, his reply was really vague: ''Even though I'm grumpy and moody?'' and after I said yes, he said ''strange how these things work''. And that was basically it. It's Tuesday night now, and nothing has happened. I felt really good when I told him, because I felt that I could move on and for me personally, it felt like a big achievement telling someone I really liked them. I feel it's really unfair that I've got no reply, for some reason I just can't move on. The other night he signed in and out about 5 times and I don't know whether I was meant to speak to him or not. This isn't just some randomer I happened to meet online, it's actually my neighbour who lives literally 10 seconds away from me. Anyway, I don't really know what to do. He is a generally unusual, and dare I say oddish person, but even if he thinks I'm the ugliest and most boring person that ever lived, shouldn't he at least say something?

Thank you to anyone that took the time to read all that and reply, I'm just finding it hard to move on, and the thing is, I don't even know why I like him, I just do.

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Reply 1

generalebriety

He's under no moral obligation to say something. Maybe he's just trying to spare your feelings... or maybe he's too ashamed to say the same back. Next time he comes online, ask him (tactfully) what he thinks about it - if he doesn't reply, take it as "it'll never happen", and move on.

Reply 2

ravenous_soup_dragon

Um...go over and speak to him in person? That way you'll get an answer for sure as he won't be able to hide over msn....

Well done for telling him though - that's incredibly brave if you haven't done anything like that before! xxx

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Thanks guys :smile:

I go to an all-girls school which has made me really, really shy unfortunately, so it was pretty big for me!! I'm so scared about going over, can see it being really awkward, but might be the best thing to do.

Reply 4

Jonquil

definitely the best thing to do. go now. go on!!
and tell us what happens darl, we're all curious now! good luck!

Reply 5

The Albatross

aww. i went to an all girls school too, so when i came to uni meeting guys was a pretty new and daunting thing. but i had a fit Taiwanese neighbour who was a bit odd but who i really liked, and after hanging out with him for a few weeks pretty much constantly i plucked up the courage to say something. turned out that he liked me back and we've been together for over 2 years now! :love:

just do it - maybe he's just not sure what to say, and you've already told him, so there's nothing to lose

Reply 6

gagol

has she been? is she back yet?

Reply 7

Jonquil

Dunno! Come on anon #1!!

Reply 8

gagol

she seems to have been gone about 20 mins, I think that might be a good sign!

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Hey!! Hahaa....you guys are so supportive. Wish I could say that I'd been and gone, unfortunately I haven't. His mother's at home and well, yea... Awful reason isn't it? Should I just text him :blushing:

? Sorry to disappoint you all. He is rather odd sometimes so don't even know what to do if I went there. Funny how one person can just do this to you. :frown:

Reply 10

jaroxski

Just knock and ask to talk to him. His mother will get the message.

Reply 11

Jonquil

Go!!

Reply 12

sweetface.

I think you should just leave it, he's just a random guy online you said. I don't think anything could happen for you. But in the near future you will get someone who cares for you.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Lyndzxx

I think you should just leave it, he's just a random guy online you said. I don't think anything could happen for you. But in the near future you will get someone who cares for you.

No, this ISN'T some random guy online, he's my neighbour and I can see his house from my room which is freaky. And about his mother, she's really noisy (e.g. he called a friend once and she did 1471 to see who he'd called...), so not comfortable at all going over.

Reply 14

Jonquil

invite him to yours??

Reply 15

WhiteLily

I think everybody else has gave you the best advice!Only thing you can do is ask him again and in person like people have said,At least then you will get a response and know wether to move on or not.

Reply 16

theCapitalist

hmm I'm gonna go against the grain here. I find telling someone you like them outright is just the worst thing to do. You give them too much power, and power corrupts. Because there's absolutely no risk in it for him, no deadling, no incentive to be proactive it's far too tempting for the guy to sit on it, mull it over and enjoy holding all the cards without any obligation to give anything in return.

My friend said it best when she said that if someone gives you a 'I don't know, I'm confused' response to a heartfelt confession it's kinda a sign of lack of respect. It's not a nice thing to do to someone, it leaves a deadline completely open with him in a position of absolute security, adn you in a position of absolute insecurity.

I think the only time it's wise to say it is if the relationship between both of you is going going well, and there's the expectation for it to move onto the next level.

Reply 17

Scarlett_Jewel

I'm of a similar opinion as above...

I understand what it's like wanting to get something like that off your chest, and furthermore wanting that clarity and closure on the situation, but the response you got was not a positive one and you are totally opening yourself up to be extremely hurt. I think you should accept that he doesn't feel the same way and find a new boy to spy :smile: