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Would I Look Stupid?
I'll try and keep this short.
I've been seeing a guy for the past six weeks or so. Things were going well and he was very attentive and treated me lovely. On Valentines day, he posted a rose a card and his t-shirt through the door, seeing as he had mine. I haven't heard from him since then. I've obviously tried contacting him via phone and Facebook and he's completely ignored me. Considering his behaviour these past few weeks i'm utterly stunned that this has happened because, if anything, he always seemed really keen, and i was fairly certain it would evolve into a relationship. I appreciate that it's childish, but my friend and I called his number from her phone last night to establish if it is acttally me he's ignoring. He doesn't have my friends number and he didn't pick up. He hasn't even contacted her to enquire as to who the number belongs.
The reason for my post is this. I have his rugby training fleece and he needs it back. I know this is the case because i'd forget to return it wheni'd go round and he merely mentioned that he needed it. In return, i'd really like my t-shirt back as it was a gift from a friend when we went to Amsterdam recently and we all have the same t-shirt. I'm thinking of dropping by at his house, returning the jumper and his t-shirt and asking for mine. Also, I'm planning on asking him why he suddenly decided he didn't want to see me again, or in so many words.
Good idea or bad idea?
I've been seeing a guy for the past six weeks or so. Things were going well and he was very attentive and treated me lovely. On Valentines day, he posted a rose a card and his t-shirt through the door, seeing as he had mine. I haven't heard from him since then. I've obviously tried contacting him via phone and Facebook and he's completely ignored me. Considering his behaviour these past few weeks i'm utterly stunned that this has happened because, if anything, he always seemed really keen, and i was fairly certain it would evolve into a relationship. I appreciate that it's childish, but my friend and I called his number from her phone last night to establish if it is acttally me he's ignoring. He doesn't have my friends number and he didn't pick up. He hasn't even contacted her to enquire as to who the number belongs.
The reason for my post is this. I have his rugby training fleece and he needs it back. I know this is the case because i'd forget to return it wheni'd go round and he merely mentioned that he needed it. In return, i'd really like my t-shirt back as it was a gift from a friend when we went to Amsterdam recently and we all have the same t-shirt. I'm thinking of dropping by at his house, returning the jumper and his t-shirt and asking for mine. Also, I'm planning on asking him why he suddenly decided he didn't want to see me again, or in so many words.
Good idea or bad idea?
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
Of course you wouldn't- go for it
Reply 2
do it!
Reply 3
That's exactly what I'd do, but to be honest, I'd have gone right off him for being so damn rude.
I would get my t-shirt back then forget about him, hun.
I would get my t-shirt back then forget about him, hun.
Reply 5
he could just be ill, or having family problems.
TBH I would be worrying if his not answering your calls and you haven't heard from him in a week. If he needs this fleece then why hasn't he asked for it?
Personally if that was anyone I knew I would be worried something would have happened so maybe you should think about seeing if his ok? Don't just go and ask why has he been ignoring you but ask him is eveything alright and say you were strating to get worried about him
Personally if that was anyone I knew I would be worried something would have happened so maybe you should think about seeing if his ok? Don't just go and ask why has he been ignoring you but ask him is eveything alright and say you were strating to get worried about him
Reply 7
Thank you very much for your kind replies.
Well, I wouldn't be so baffled if he hadn't gone to the trouble of phoning to ask my house number and then leaving the stuff of Valentine's Day, just seems a bit odd.
Well that the thing, he has lots of activity on Facebook, yet he's failed to return my calls and messages on Facebook.
I understand that he's clearly not interested, but he literally would have to have completely lost interest after the 14th, which seems strange considering the effort he went to..
Well, I wouldn't be so baffled if he hadn't gone to the trouble of phoning to ask my house number and then leaving the stuff of Valentine's Day, just seems a bit odd.
Well that the thing, he has lots of activity on Facebook, yet he's failed to return my calls and messages on Facebook.
I understand that he's clearly not interested, but he literally would have to have completely lost interest after the 14th, which seems strange considering the effort he went to..
MAYBE he's playing hard to get. Some boys do do it, even if they are very interested because they don't want to seem too keen. but its very rude, and if he is doing that then hes taken it to a bit of an extreme! definitely go and see him, and tell him that you're assuming he's not interested. you never know, he might just be too shy to talk to you 
Reply 10
As said before, I would be worried about him more than anything. Go round, check he's alrite and if he is, then ask y hes been ignoring u, or better just say "You've gone off me havent you?" and see what he says. Dont go in with guns blazing though, there may be something genuinely wrong.
Reply 11
He posted his t-shirt because I left mine at his house, which I then busted him wearing when I went to the gym. I liked this particular t-shirt, so presume those are the reasons.
Reply 12
good idea. im pretty sure he wants to keep your t-shirt, ur last post makes me think this even more! u might have a job getting it back
the t-shirt he posted of his he meant to be an exchange with yours i reckon
the t-shirt he posted of his he meant to be an exchange with yours i reckon
Reply 14
Cyclotron
good idea. im pretty sure he wants to keep your t-shirt, ur last post makes me think this even more! u might have a job getting it back
the t-shirt he posted of his he meant to be an exchange with yours i reckon
the t-shirt he posted of his he meant to be an exchange with yours i reckon
But then surely that would suggest that he's interested? Because surely if he was interested than he'd think that by delaying contact for so long it'd only serve to ruin any relationship we might ever have.
That' another big issue; at no point did he ever make me feel that he was in it for, I hate to sound crude, but sex. He always seemed to talk in the future like 'we'll do this and we'll do that'.
Also, he was away on Valentines night. He phoned me the night before (which was only a day after I caught him wearing my t-shirt at the gym) to ask my house number. He also said "i'm not around Valentine's night but we'll do something nice on Friday". He was in fact away, the fixture was on the website. However, seeing as I haven't spoken to him since the evening before Valentines, he obviously didn't arrange anything for that Friday, despite me sending him a Facebook message asking "are we still on for tonight"
His behaviour is so erratic I just don't know what to think.
Reply 15
Bizarre. I'd go round and return his fleece and ask if you could have yours, and casually mention that he seems to be very busy these days, or that you haven't heard from him lately and were wondering if he's OK. Good luck!
Reply 16
Also, is it wise to put the t-shirt in the bag too?
Reply 18
"He only wants me for my t-shirt!" 
Lol.
What a strange situation.
Lol.
What a strange situation.Reply 19
Ok, so I went to see him this morning. When I knocked on the door he wasn't up, so his housemate answered the door. The rest of them were acting rather sheepishly, asking if I was okay and what I'd been up to.
He called me up to his room and cuddled me. Obviously, I calmly asked why he was doing that as it seemed as though he was no longer interested. I asked if it was him who had sent the card, and he said it was. I told him he shouldn't have done that if he wasn't going to follow it through.
He then told me that his ex had called him the night before Valentines telling she still had feelings for him. He tells me he obviously still has feelings for her but that he also likes me.
I returned the fleece and t-shirt and asked for mine. He seemed a little nervous and said: "I know its in the room cos I only wore it two days ago, but i'll definately give it back to you"
I was appreciative of his honesty and feel he tied up the loose ends.
I told him that I obvfiously want him to be happy and do what he thinks is right. I didn't want to get angry so I told him that obviously, as I like him and am not seing anyone else, to keep my number. He said he would and that he had to see how things were and how he felt about his ex for a week or so. I understand this.
He was very cuddly and kept doing this. I insisted that I'd let my self out but he followed me to the door, cuddled me again for a little while and kissed me on the cheek.
I'm sorry for going on about this, but it's rather upset me because he's lovely. While my housemates' comments and advice is helpful, sometimes a strangers' view is handy and ive found tsr useful, so thank you for your comments up til now.
Really dont know what to think now, especially as he seemed so upset while he was telling me...
Will I ever get my bloody t-shirt back, lol?!!!...
He called me up to his room and cuddled me. Obviously, I calmly asked why he was doing that as it seemed as though he was no longer interested. I asked if it was him who had sent the card, and he said it was. I told him he shouldn't have done that if he wasn't going to follow it through.
He then told me that his ex had called him the night before Valentines telling she still had feelings for him. He tells me he obviously still has feelings for her but that he also likes me.
I returned the fleece and t-shirt and asked for mine. He seemed a little nervous and said: "I know its in the room cos I only wore it two days ago, but i'll definately give it back to you"
I was appreciative of his honesty and feel he tied up the loose ends.
I told him that I obvfiously want him to be happy and do what he thinks is right. I didn't want to get angry so I told him that obviously, as I like him and am not seing anyone else, to keep my number. He said he would and that he had to see how things were and how he felt about his ex for a week or so. I understand this.
He was very cuddly and kept doing this. I insisted that I'd let my self out but he followed me to the door, cuddled me again for a little while and kissed me on the cheek.
I'm sorry for going on about this, but it's rather upset me because he's lovely. While my housemates' comments and advice is helpful, sometimes a strangers' view is handy and ive found tsr useful, so thank you for your comments up til now.
Really dont know what to think now, especially as he seemed so upset while he was telling me...
Will I ever get my bloody t-shirt back, lol?!!!...
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