Will talking help?

I broke up with my first proper girlfriend back in January. Although we ended it on a good note and for a week, we still spoke to each other, that weekend I said some horrible stuff about her and her friends and they all made a kind of pact never to talk to me again. I don't actually mind because I found out some stuff through this argument about what she has been saying behind my back and it made me realise she isn't right for me.

I've also seen her real side since and I hate her/never want to talk to her again, yet the fact is I can't get rid of her!...from my mind that is. I had a long convo with her a day after the argument and it didn't help. I thought we could end things, but it just seems like things haven't been resolved.

I keep talking about her with my friends, I think about her before I go to sleep and I've been urging to tell her how I felt back when we were going out.

Would talking to her and telling her how I feel (even though she doesn't give a crap about me), help?

Reply 1

Jonquil

10

No, I don't think you should talk to her about it again. It seems as if you still have feelings for her, but you said yourself that she is not right for you. Try to move on, and start thinking about another girl. you're probably in a habit of thinking about this girl all the time as you did when you were together. how long were you going out?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Jonquil

No, I don't think you should talk to her about it again. It seems as if you still have feelings for her, but you said yourself that she is not right for you. Try to move on, and start thinking about another girl. you're probably in a habit of thinking about this girl all the time as you did when you were together. how long were you going out?

Well its been longer then a month and in that time I've had a little fling (1 week) and that didn't help much.

I am thinking about another girl...I fancy another girl LOADS (a bit too much actually) but I still can't completely remove my ex from my feelings.

I really know she isn't right for me...and she will never talk to me again (which is good for me) but the fact that it just feels like we left things unsolved...argh it just feels like I need to talk to her, I always see her at lunchtime and I always think about it...then stop myself because I'm scared its gonna bring my feelings back for her.

Reply 3

Jonquil

10

in that case just tell her you're sorry, and tell her that you think it ended on a bad note and you'd like to be friends. :smile:

if she's a nice girl then she'll probably agree with you and you will get a bit of closure. If she still never wants to talk to you again at least you've tried and you can forget about it.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Jonquil

in that case just tell her you're sorry, and tell her that you think it ended on a bad note and you'd like to be friends. :smile:

if she's a nice girl then she'll probably agree with you and you will get a bit of closure. If she still never wants to talk to you again at least you've tried and you can forget about it.

I asked her a week after our massive argument and she told me she hates my guts and she had promised her friends she would never speak to me again.

And I dont want to be friends with her because I know what she's really like (as a friend).

I just want to tell her how I feel/felt about her...but I'm scared that it might make me think about her even more.

Reply 5

Jonquil

10

maybe if you are friends you won't think about her as much, and anyway you fancy this other girl. i think its just taking a bit of time for you to forget about her. have you made any moves with this girl that you really like?

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Jonquil

maybe if you are friends you won't think about her as much, and anyway you fancy this other girl. i think its just taking a bit of time for you to forget about her. have you made any moves with this girl that you really like?

No, we're just associates - although she calls me her friend, we never talk outside of sixth form. She spends all of her lunchtime everyday sitting next to me since we sit in a big group and eat.

But I really do not want to be friends with my ex and she has already expressed her feelings that she doesn't want to be friends with me.

Yes I know it makes no sense, I don't wanna be friends with her, I dont wanna go out with her...but I can't get her off my mind! Is time really that great a healer? Or do I just need another proper girlfriend?

Since posting this thread I THINK I have realised that talking to her would be silly.

Reply 7

Jonquil

10

well if its made you realise something for yourself then it was worth posting about :smile:

yes, time is a great healer. and maybe getting another girlfriend would help you get over the last one. BUT that shouldn't be the only reason to have a girlfriend :rolleyes:

but im sure you wouldn't do that anyway xx

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

Jonquil

well if its made you realise something for yourself then it was worth posting about :smile:

yes, time is a great healer. and maybe getting another girlfriend would help you get over the last one. BUT that shouldn't be the only reason to have a girlfriend :rolleyes:

but im sure you wouldn't do that anyway xx