The Student Room Group
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>
Uni students - Complete our survey >>

Should I reprt my manager for sexual assault? Plz help thnx

So I'm 17 working part time in a hotel as a cleaner and still at school
About 8 months ago while cleaning a room my manager was a bit inappropriate like sexually even though I said no and as a result I got pregnant. He found out and he gave me cash and helped me through abortion (which btw I will never stop despising myself for but I just didn't know what else to do).

Anyway that's all fine and it's over now but now a woman who works in the hotel has claimed that same manager touched her inappropriately last week on Monday and she pushed him away and it happened again on Tuesday. She's told the police but the thing is she has never got on with any of the managers or supevisors and is definitely quite bitter about their better wages and hours etc so a lot of people don't believe her

She'll lose her job if this doesn't go her way and obvs I believe her and I know im a terrible person for hesitating at all to back her up but I'm so ashamed and so scared I don't even know how to go about this like who would I tell first

And do u think I could wait and see what the outcome of her complaint is to see whether it's necessary for me to back her up or would it be too late by then?

Sorry for rambling thanx for any help x
You got raped
You should report it please do
That criminal shouldn't be roaming around in public


Posted from TSR Mobile
Reply 2
Avatar for ExRN
ExRN
14
Original post by Anonymous
So I'm 17 working part time in a hotel as a cleaner and still at school
About 8 months ago while cleaning a room my manager was a bit inappropriate like sexually even though I said no and as a result I got pregnant. He found out and he gave me cash and helped me through abortion (which btw I will never stop despising myself for but I just didn't know what else to do).

Anyway that's all fine and it's over now but now a woman who works in the hotel has claimed that same manager touched her inappropriately last week on Monday and she pushed him away and it happened again on Tuesday. She's told the police but the thing is she has never got on with any of the managers or supevisors and is definitely quite bitter about their better wages and hours etc so a lot of people don't believe her

She'll lose her job if this doesn't go her way and obvs I believe her and I know im a terrible person for hesitating at all to back her up but I'm so ashamed and so scared I don't even know how to go about this like who would I tell first

And do u think I could wait and see what the outcome of her complaint is to see whether it's necessary for me to back her up or would it be too late by then?

Sorry for rambling thanx for any help x


A male opinion: If that woman loses her job, will that be on your conciounce for the rest of your life?
You know the truth and you could save this women's job and restore some dignity.
Now, I know it is very difficult to broach subjects like what happened with yourself so it's all down to how well you could deal with the aftermath personally. A report to the police of the previous conduct of that manager is going to go a long way in supporting her claims too.
Why couldn't you tell your mother about what happened when it did? If this has happened on two occasions in the past year or so, it is likely that it would have occurred before and is highly likely to occur in the future. Im not condoning a one off rape by the way, but if he didn't get the shock of his life by finding out you were pregnant from his actions and then he does similar again, it says to me that this guy has no morals and is a ticking time bomb.
If you can't do it in person by fear of shame or reprisals, why not report it anonymously through a letter? Maybe that would be enough to sustain what this other woman has suffered without you being directly involved. I know someone very well that had a similar thing happen and she reported it to the manager in the morning and the guy was gone by lunch. It wasnt as serious as your case but it does show that reporting these things are taken very seriously.
Reply 3
Avatar for ExRN
ExRN
14
Original post by spiritless98
You got raped
You should report it please do
That criminal shouldn't be roaming around in public


Posted from TSR Mobile


Put yourself in the same shoes. Do you not think it's difficult to report something like that? Anyone would say "report it straight away" but it takes a significant amount of strength to tell people things of that nature. Would you like other people knowing and then you will be forever wondering what people are thinking about you etc. Apparently only 1/5 rapes are ever reported and I understand why.
Original post by Anonymous
About 8 months ago while cleaning a room my manager was a bit inappropriate like sexually even though I said no and as a result I got pregnant. He found out and he gave me cash and helped me through abortion (which btw I will never stop despising myself for but I just didn't know what else to do).

I'll just say you don't get pregnant as a result of someone being 'a bit inappropriate' and that you can regret something like having an abortion even while knowing that it was the right thing to do at the time.

I don't even know how to go about this like who would I tell first

And do u think I could wait and see what the outcome of her complaint is to see whether it's necessary for me to back her up or would it be too late by then?


It's up to you. If you didn't talk to her, her complaint failed and she was fired etc, how would you feel?

I would talk to her sooner rather than later. Whether that's before or after talking about what happened to you with somewhere like a local rape crisis unit.
This is so sad. Please report it anonymously, how about you call up the police from a public phone box?

I've been harassed sexually and believe me it is TERRIFYING to report.

For that sake of all of us victims, you would be doing a great service to report it. And if you want to talk about it privately, there is always a listening ear. Heck if you want to rant my inbox is always available!

Quick Reply

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you