Still missing my ex

It's been 5 weeks since we split, and I've been doing really well: throwing myself into my course, spending lots of time with friends, planning some exciting trips, and taking up new exercise classes. But every few days I just get such strong pangs of missing him that I feel like I'm back to square one. They don't last forever; sometimes for an evening, sometimes just for an hour or so. But they're so strong that everything in me wants to drive round there and sob in his arms and tell him how much I miss him.

We broke up for various situational reasons and I know, logically, it would be a huge strain on both of us to get back together right now. I don't think it would be the right thing to do. But that doesn't change the fact that I love and miss him and sometimes the memory of how he made me feel is so strong that I feel like I'm going to explode. We've stayed friends, and speak once a week or so, which is really nice and it does help; but these cravings for him come on with no warning, sometimes when I'm tired and want a cuddle, sometimes because something amazing has happened and I can't ring and tell him any more, sometimes for no reason at all.

I know I've got stronger since we split, and have waves of feeling really optimistic; but these horrible pangs of missing him bring me down so quickly and are just so intense that the only thing that can make me feel better is the one thing I can't have. I don't think there's much advice anyone can give, but I just thought writing here might help me get it out as I'm missing him like hell again tonight. Anybody else going through this?

Reply 1

lollipopsticks

1

i am in the same situation broke up around 6 weeks ago still talk to him all the time see him etc.im lonely i think but he never really gave me a reason to split which i think makes it harder :frown:

i know wot your going through but.i cry all the time because of it.and i keep thinkin how hard its gona be seeing him with someone else even though he says he doesnt want another relationship :frown:

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

Still missing my ex an awful lot after 10 weeks. Things were a little better when i had stuff to take my mind off things but now its a bit harder.

The worst thing is, as the above poster said, there was never a proper explanation for her breaking up with me and she didnt do it face to face. Also, she seems to have very little respect for what we had before.

So yeah i guess there are plenty of people in this situation. Let time take its course.

Reply 3

*Claire*

1

To the OP, I'd say thats pretty normal to feel like that but its good you're doing your best to get on with your life. When I broke up with my bf I also missed that friendship but over time it got easier & I stopped needing him wen stuff went wrong etc

Reply 4

oh get over urself

Reply 5

girl079

time does heal. it will get better

Reply 6

purple_octopus

I broke up with my ex about 5 weeks ago too... i've done exactly the same as you, thrown myself into my course, tried going out with friends, been shopping, taken up a new society but i still have moments every day where i think of him or something reminds me of when we were together and it hurts.

unfortunately we're still living together in university halls so it's taking me longer to get over him as i have to see him everyday. We've remained good friends but it's hard changing gear and going back to friend mode... i do miss him but we were so incompatible it was stupid to get together in the first place.

It hurts so much sometimes, especially the thought of him with someone new but i'm told what doesn't kill you makes you stronger so i'm trying to grow a hard outer shell and just battle on. It will get better, remember back to the first week after your split and you'll realise how far you've come in a month. You sound like you're doing well so just keep going and before you know it one day things will seem a lot brighter :smile:

Reply 7

fairycakes

12

hey, i know exactly how u feel. it took me bout 4 nearly 5 months to get over my ex. not sure if i'm totally over it, mind, but i don't get these pangs anymore. i used to have day dreams all the time abot how thingos used to be, and how i used to feel when i was with him.
it does get easier with time...
hugs xxxx

Reply 8

Azzle

1

i broke up from mine almost a year ago and i still feel like it. i think it's cos i told him everything and when problems arise i know it's him i want to talk to. i got some bad news today and just wanted to see him. but its my own silly fault and i supose you get over it eventually

Reply 9

romeosbitch

15

6 months since i split from my ex. we broke up for her own family reasons and its tough to accept its over when i didnt do anything wrong and instead of feeling she could confide in me she blocked me out instead.
slightly bitter as you can see!
especially as now she's got someone else.

the point to this frankly depressing post is that you're not alone.

Reply 10

Anonymous #4

this thread is just so so so for me ( lol sorry the OP :P )...
Just broke up with bf 2 weeks ago even on our anniversary ( bet he didnt even remember that ...)
Its hard, i try to laugh, make my self busy but the end of the day all i do is sitting alone and cry like hell :frown:

We broke up because there was no future between us 2 different backgrounds, 2 opposite lifestyles, different opinions...

Im just somehow wondering if he ever misses me or already has had a new girl...*sighs*...

Reply 11

tetrahydrocannabinol.

10

Trust me, you'll get over him. I've just returned to TSR after a long break, and I was looking at my old posts, one of which was about a guy who I'd split up with at the time. I was really upset, but now when I look back I laugh. I'm with a lovely guy now, and I look back at the ugly mong I was so upset about and laugh! When you're with someone, or missing them, you fail to overlook their faults (I did this big-time; I'm talking body odour, smegma, a 3 incher, a face and voice like Shrek and the most off-puttingly judgemental family ever!), but seriously, there will be a day when you look back and laugh. Mine took hardly any time at all, but other people take longer, but however long you need to heal, know that you will do. Stay strong and healthy! xxx

Still missing my ex

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