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"Can't you hear me, S.O.S.?": TLG's PhD study blog!

New blog can be found here: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7614702

26 year old ethnomusicology student (University of London) researching ABBA fandom, seeks TSR peeps to act as cheerleaders as she battles her way through PhD studies. Apply for cheerleading position(s) by following/posting on this thread :biggrin:

A bit about my PhD topic

A bit about my specific PhD project: I am doing an ethnographic study of ABBA fandom in the 21st century :awesome:

(Ethnographic means that there's a practical element to the research, like going to fan meet-ups/conventions and interviewing people, etc, rather than just theorising ABBA based on my own guesswork/conclusions.)

I chose to do this partly because I am an ABBA fan myself, but also because I think ABBA are an interesting case study, since they continue to be part of mainstream culture despite having never reformed. (They have actually turned down $1 billion USD in the past to reform :headfire:

) I figured there must be some interesting things to say about them!

I have been doing participant-observation fieldwork with the UK branch of the Official International ABBA Fan Club, and have interviewed an ABBA biographer, as well as the curator/director of the ABBA Museum in Stockholm. I've also been keeping tabs on Facebook groups revolving around ABBA. So a lot of my work involves hanging round on Facebook. Such a tough life I lead :emo:

A bit about me/some housekeeping rules

A few bits of contextual info about me/my PhD, for those who don't know me that well:

1. I suffer from schizoaffective disorder and am registered as mentally disabled. This inevitably shapes how my PhD journey goes a lot

2. Ethnomusicology is (put crudely) the social anthropological study of music. It is the study of "music IN culture" and "music AS culture" (Alan Merriam). Traditionally it referred to so-called 'world musics' but now it encompasses everything

3. My undergraduate degree is in music from Woosta College, University of Oxford. My MA degree is in music (ethnomusicology pathway) from Goldsmiths, University of London. Had a **** time at Oxford for many reasons which I will not discuss here, but which again shape the way I approach my PhD. Goldsmiths was much better. I am currently at a different college of the University of London (would prefer not to name it here).

4. If you are one of these people who like to put two and two together and find my uni website page/academia.edu - please DO NOT refer to me on here by my full first name, or my full name (first name/surname). I prefer to keep a degree of anonymity on here

If you wanna call me something, you may call me Shan or TLG.

Posted from TSR Mobile

(edited 4 months ago)

Reply 1980

Muttley79

20

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Yours truly is gonna be on ITV News around 6.30pm today (possibly repeated at 10pm news too) :awesome:

Oooo

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/entertainment-arts-59174876

"As Abba release their first studio album for 40 years, Voyage, Benny Andersson and Bjorn Ulvaeus speak to the BBC about being compared to their old music and why you won't be seeing Agnetha and Anni-Frid"

Reply 1981

flaurie

22

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Yours truly is gonna be on ITV News around 6.30pm today (possibly repeated at 10pm news too) :awesome:

Reply 1982

Scotney

20

Oh must catch that on catch up! Well done you! :clap2:

Reply 1983

thesnowbones

11

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Lots of solidarity! Do see how you feel once you're fully healed - these kinda decisions are best made when not in pain, or in the throes of a mental health blip/episode :console:

Thank you so much :smile:

Original post

by Scotney

So sorry to hear about how badly you are being treated. It is definitely them not you. I can tell you you are not in an unusual position at all sadly. Academia is all about publications and supervisors reps depend on their Phd students delivering. Their next bit of funding also depends on this. I actually think there is a massive problem in the sector and I also think it prevents research moving forward by discouraging risk taking and innovation.
Take care of yourself and get yourself better. Your health is the most important thing you have got for sure. And if you decide to walk away or carry on remember it is NO reflection on you or your ability. Sending virtual hugs.

Thank you so much :smile:

I did receive an email a few days afterwards that was ALMOST an apology. They said I could move my review to January, so that I had some new work to submit for it (which I was supposed to do whilst signed off for a review next week, but they still wanted to go ahead with the review and state 'no progress made,' despite me doing tonnes of other work :/ ) I do feel in a better place now, although I'm still not happy with how I've been treated. I am going to see how my review goes in January, and then take it from there. I have also been in contact with my pastoral team who weren't impressed with how I was spoken to. I am learning that this isn't a normal situation for PhD students, which is disheartening in itself. It hardly inspires you to keep working towards one.

Reply 1984

Scotney

20

Original post

by thesnowbones

Thank you so much :smile:

I did receive an email a few days afterwards that was ALMOST an apology. They said I could move my review to January, so that I had some new work to submit for it (which I was supposed to do whilst signed off for a review next week, but they still wanted to go ahead with the review and state 'no progress made,' despite me doing tonnes of other work :/ ) I do feel in a better place now, although I'm still not happy with how I've been treated. I am going to see how my review goes in January, and then take it from there. I have also been in contact with my pastoral team who weren't impressed with how I was spoken to. I am learning that this isn't a normal situation for PhD students, which is disheartening in itself. It hardly inspires you to keep working towards one.

This is actually very similar to a person close to me found themselves. It' s a grim position for anyone to be in. Try and keep your spirits up though I totally get it is a very dispiriting situation to be and trying to get work done in. Honestly I increasingly do not have a lot of faith in the attitude of supervisors. Phd's to my mind should be a chance to try stuff, make mistakes and learn from those mistakes, problem solving, being able to reconstruct things. Seems like unless you are immediately successful you are seen as a liability. So many supervisors are woeful. They do not have the skills to help people who need constructive guidance. Thanks for updating us and I send you my best wishes. We are more than happy to sympathise and encourage.

Reply 1985

thesnowbones

11

Original post

by Scotney

This is actually very similar to a person close to me found themselves. It' s a grim position for anyone to be in. Try and keep your spirits up though I totally get it is a very dispiriting situation to be and trying to get work done in. Honestly I increasingly do not have a lot of faith in the attitude of supervisors. Phd's to my mind should be a chance to try stuff, make mistakes and learn from those mistakes, problem solving, being able to reconstruct things. Seems like unless you are immediately successful you are seen as a liability. So many supervisors are woeful. They do not have the skills to help people who need constructive guidance. Thanks for updating us and I send you my best wishes. We are more than happy to sympathise and encourage.

Thank you. I definitely feel more like a burden than anything else...

Reply 1986

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Original post

by thesnowbones

Thank you. I definitely feel more like a burden than anything else...

Sorry for my late response to this, I've been unwell the past few days :redface:

It's horrible that you're the one being made to feel like a burden, when the problem is actually with other people/the general PhD environment and experience :frown:

I imagine it must be hard to challenge these thoughts but try not to think yourself as a burden. You applied and they accepted you (and perhaps even funded you?) - you got your place on the PhD programme fair and square. You deserve to be treated better than this :hugs:

Reply 1987

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Had a chat with LA supervisor yday. She said I seemed a lot more myself than the previous week, even though I'm still feeling crappy :redface:

(I must have looked SERIOUSLY bad last week, doh :getmecoat:

) I updated her on the general fan reaction to ABBA's Voyage album and she said it was really interesting.

She also introduced my to Microsoft OneNote and suggested trying it myself, so that's my small task for this week :yes:

Reply 1988

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

ABBA's Voyage album just reached No.1 on the Charts! :yay:

The stats regarding this are astonishing: Zoe Ball said on BBC Radio 2 yesterday that the album had outsold the rest of the Top 40 albums COMBINED :headfire:

Reply 1989

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Trying to psyche myself up to open my Chapter 4 document after a month or so :hide:

Reply 1990

Muttley79

20

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Trying to psyche myself up to open my Chapter 4 document after a month or so :hide:

You can do it TLG :smile:

Reply 1991

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Original post

by Muttley79

You can do it TLG :smile:

Thank you

I opened it and it had stuff in it that I don't remember moving in there :erm:

I guess I'm not really the best judge of how much writing is left for the chapter, if I can't even remember basic things like that :getmecoat:

Reply 1992

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Sent crazy emails to LA supervisor yesterday at 1am, disclosing something really big/heavy. She wrote back very quickly but mindfully, and we had a chat about it on Zoom yesterday :redface:

Reply 1993

Scotney

20

Life is hard sometimes but tomorrow is another day as they say! Sending warm wishes. Please try not to beat yourself up over this.

Reply 1994

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Original post

by Scotney

Life is hard sometimes but tomorrow is another day as they say! Sending warm wishes. Please try not to beat yourself up over this.

Thank you

I feel better for having disclosed to LA supervisor, but also confused as to why she's not run away screaming in the other direction :colondollar:

Reply 1995

Scotney

20

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

Thank you

I feel better for having disclosed to LA supervisor, but also confused as to why she's not run away screaming in the other direction :colondollar:

Occasionally you find a gem in unexpected places. :littleangel:

Reply 1996

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Original post

by Scotney

Occasionally you find a gem in unexpected places. :littleangel:

So true

Reply 1997

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

My ABBA Voyage CD finally arrived today! It was meant to reach me on the release date (5th November) :colonhash:

I got the deluxe version, with came with postcards and stickers, so have duly pimped up my laptop to ABBA-fiy it. That counts as thesis work, right? :ninja:

Reply 1998

The_Lonely_Goatherd

OP

20

Reply 1999

Muttley79

20

Original post

by The_Lonely_Goatherd

My ABBA Voyage CD finally arrived today! It was meant to reach me on the release date (5th November) :colonhash:

I got the deluxe version, with came with postcards and stickers, so have duly pimped up my laptop to ABBA-fiy it. That counts as thesis work, right? :ninja:

Yes - PhD worthy actions - I expect Persephone and Penny approve of the cover :smile:

"Can't you hear me, S.O.S.?": TLG's PhD study blog!

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