Annoying bloke problem!

Hi,

I have got a problem with a friend of mine, who I have known for about 3 years. When we first met he was really interested in me but as I didn't want to be with him, he got annoyed and we stopped being mates, but started talking again about 18 months ago. We have got on really well since then, and as he is always telling me about his latest girlfriend and asking advice etc I have thought that his feelings had changed towards me, which I was really happy about. But then last week, totally out of the blue he told me he loves me, he never stops thinking about me and I'm the most special person he knows. I'm flattered, but I don't want him to feel like this. I am in a serious, long-term relationship with someone I love very much and never saw this friendship as anything more.
This guy knows I love my boyfriend, and that I am not interested in him, but won't leave me alone. My bloke's overseas alot, as he's in the army, but our relationship is very strong. Even so, this friend keeps telling me I'm not happy, he 'd make me happier, he'd do anything for me etc and is really pressuring me to break up with my boyfriend. He also keeps talking about sex whenever we talk, like asking how good my boyfriend is and if I get frustrated when he's away. I find this really awkward as I think sex is just an issue between my boyfriend and I, and we certainly don't have any problems, but even if we did I wouldn't tell this guy!! I have kind of realised the last few days that our friendship was never based on anything more than his feelings, and was not platonic as I thought, so I don't think we should be mates anymore, coz my boyfriend is much more important to me.
I suppose I just wondered if I should continue trying to let him down gently or be blunt? I considered getting my boyfriend to get rid of him, but I do care about my friend and don't want to hurt his feelings, without leading him on!
Sorry about longness of this post....

Thanks :smile:

Reply 1

nmt_oli

You need to tell him you are still not interested, and never will be. He obviously still isnt over you and won't be able to move on without definate rejection.
There is a likely hood you will need to give up the whole friends thing.

do be flattered, I think rather than stalking you he does genuinely think your amazing and really does want you, unfortunately, feelings arent always mutual - i know that from experience, and it hurts!

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