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is it possible to trick yourself?
basically i lack motivation in everything. i just dont seem to want to go and do stuff that requires some effort or that takes me away from my room. for example, i don't want to focus on college work and the thought just depresses me (i need AAB in my exams and i doubt i'll get it), i don't want to go on driving lessons which means im not really progressing and it's costing my parents a fortune, i dont wanna even go shopping or simple stuff like that. basically i need to pull my finger out but it's soooooo hard. when i think about all this i hate myself for it and that gets me even more down lol. i've been feeling this for way too long and it's really annoying me now.
aaaaanyways, if i tried to think more positive despite not actually feeling it, would i eventually be able to trick myself into having a more positive outlook on life?
thanks
aaaaanyways, if i tried to think more positive despite not actually feeling it, would i eventually be able to trick myself into having a more positive outlook on life?
thanks
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Reply 1
Yeah you will, Everytime a negative thought comes into your head challenge it with a postivive thing and you will find things will be become easier. It may take time tho trying to change the way you think can be difficult but it will work.
Reply 4
As others have said, for each negative thought, challenge yourself with a postive thought.
What are you good at? For each time you achieve something that you didn't want to do, reward yourself with doing the thing you're good at and enjoy doing for a short time.
If you're feeling down, look at natural remedies such as St John's Wort (although if you're female and on the pill, it can affect that so if you're having sex, use a condom) or Evening Primrose Oil. In some cases, feeling down and less motivated is actually caused by poor diet. (I know I feel better when I'm eating properly.)
What are you good at? For each time you achieve something that you didn't want to do, reward yourself with doing the thing you're good at and enjoy doing for a short time.
If you're feeling down, look at natural remedies such as St John's Wort (although if you're female and on the pill, it can affect that so if you're having sex, use a condom) or Evening Primrose Oil. In some cases, feeling down and less motivated is actually caused by poor diet. (I know I feel better when I'm eating properly.)
Reply 5
what is it thats making you feel down in the first place though?
Reply 6
i dont know really, i have generally a lack of motivation but sometimes it gets a lot worse and i have major depressive times where i lock myself in my room in the dark and just cry...lol. which sounds bad but after that i sleep, wake up and feel ok again. but when im in those moods it's usually coz i feel like life is pointless and think about how im just gonna end up doing jobs i hate and be unhappy and bored throughout life, which is pretty stupid when i think about it with a clear head. and some other stuff but that'll do : )
Reply 8
Anonymous
basically i lack motivation in everything. i just dont seem to want to go and do stuff that requires some effort or that takes me away from my room. for example, i don't want to focus on college work and the thought just depresses me (i need AAB in my exams and i doubt i'll get it), i don't want to go on driving lessons which means im not really progressing and it's costing my parents a fortune, i dont wanna even go shopping or simple stuff like that. basically i need to pull my finger out but it's soooooo hard. when i think about all this i hate myself for it and that gets me even more down lol. i've been feeling this for way too long and it's really annoying me now.
aaaaanyways, if i tried to think more positive despite not actually feeling it, would i eventually be able to trick myself into having a more positive outlook on life?
thanks
aaaaanyways, if i tried to think more positive despite not actually feeling it, would i eventually be able to trick myself into having a more positive outlook on life?
thanks
You need a holiday. Seriously a holiday where you definitly are away and doing nothing. But this lying on the beach with the water crashing on the coast actually sparks your creativity, it gives you enthusiasm for life. Take a 2 week holiday. OR take a day and go to the coast on your own on a boat or something. You need this for your brain to enjoy real things for your imagination to run riot. Watch people go about their daily business when you take the day trip and think about life.
This will help, it helps me. But you have to make regular trips somewhere, maybe a national trust area just to take yourself away from the stress.
Reply 9
Well you posting this thread means you care and you wana do better, use this as an example and push yourself.
Reply 10
Just think how great i am and tryto be like that and you will have no worries
Motivation is a downward and upward spiral. I like to kind of relate it to the Broken Window Theory. Basically, the theory is- that in order to stop big crimes such as theft and murder, you need to get rid of the small ones- such as litter, and graffiti. Might sound a bit off topic, but I assure you its not. I think individual lifestyles are like that, in order to be able to tackle the big things in life- such as jobs, homework, or driving lessons- we need to learn to tackle the small ones such as washing dishes or making your bed, and Im sorry to say- its not something you can do overnight, as the expression goes: Rome wasnt built in a day.
You need to be able to organize yourself, keep things tidy, wash dishes when the moment they need to be washed. You need to wake up and make your bed, clean the sink, etc. In order to do the larger things in life, you need to be able to do the small. But the moment youve pegged down the small things in life that require minimal motivation- its an upward spiral.
Good luck! You can do it if you truly put in the extra effort- and remember, you only have one life to live, so make it worthwhile!
You need to be able to organize yourself, keep things tidy, wash dishes when the moment they need to be washed. You need to wake up and make your bed, clean the sink, etc. In order to do the larger things in life, you need to be able to do the small. But the moment youve pegged down the small things in life that require minimal motivation- its an upward spiral.
Good luck! You can do it if you truly put in the extra effort- and remember, you only have one life to live, so make it worthwhile!
Wizardtb
Motivation is a downward and upward spiral. I like to kind of relate it to the Broken Window Theory
You need to be able to organize yourself, keep things tidy, wash dishes when the moment they need to be washed. You need to wake up and make your bed, clean the sink, etc. In order to do the larger things in life, you need to be able to do the small. But the moment youve pegged down the small things in life that require minimal motivation- its an upward spiral.
Good luck! You can do it if you truly put in the extra effort- and remember, you only have one life to live, so make it worthwhile!
Just thought you might like to read it again. Well, it made me laugh anyway.
Reply 13
Josiette
You could try, then get used to thinking positive all the time it will help.
possibly the best place to start in solving the problem..
Reply 14
I don't think the cliche of think positive is going to make any difference. All this bull**** of look yourself in the mirror and say your amazing...no point forcing yourself to think or say something that you don't really believe. So no in general i don't think it is possible to trick yourself. This is assuming you are of some intellect...stupid people tend to assume the position of monkey see monkey do. If somebody shouts at them and hits them on the head with a big stick saying 'be happy' then by the grace of Mary let it be so. This aside, thinking positive will not lead to a positive lifestyle.
I think you really need to try to realise what it is you want in the short term and perhaps what you would like to achieve long term. However, i wouldn't feel too pressured to knowing what you want to be or what you want from life, at 18 it's ok to be lost. Realising what you want in the short term will only come from contemplation. Perhaps you're not set to achieve your grades at school because really you know University or a high flying job is not what drives you, again in society these days your 'future' seems to represent but your career and your bank balance- this is not the case. Just because you don't get A's doesn't mean you're cast to doom and will work a crappy job all your life, you may very well find a job you love. You can only do this if you realise what it is you enjoy and what you want to actually do, don't want to study: fine, don't want to drive: fine, what do you want to do? You can't achieve something if you don't consider it worthwhile achieving.
I would say search for what it is you want and, as a consequence, you will become motivated to get it. Ohh and masturbation is always a short term solution.
I think you really need to try to realise what it is you want in the short term and perhaps what you would like to achieve long term. However, i wouldn't feel too pressured to knowing what you want to be or what you want from life, at 18 it's ok to be lost. Realising what you want in the short term will only come from contemplation. Perhaps you're not set to achieve your grades at school because really you know University or a high flying job is not what drives you, again in society these days your 'future' seems to represent but your career and your bank balance- this is not the case. Just because you don't get A's doesn't mean you're cast to doom and will work a crappy job all your life, you may very well find a job you love. You can only do this if you realise what it is you enjoy and what you want to actually do, don't want to study: fine, don't want to drive: fine, what do you want to do? You can't achieve something if you don't consider it worthwhile achieving.
I would say search for what it is you want and, as a consequence, you will become motivated to get it. Ohh and masturbation is always a short term solution.
Reply 15
allow writing essays just think happy thoughts and how great you can be. It helps if i think of fluffy bunnies brining me chocolate.
Reply 16
I get like this sometimes. Sit down and write down your goals, what you want to achieve and where you want to be in life. Dont tell yourself you cant do something until you've gone and done it. Dont be lazy, its too easy to get stuck in a rut. Work your way through the goals, get some routine into your life. Get out there and join clubs etc.
Reply 17
It sounds to me that you might be suffering from depression. Of course I can't say for sure - but one of the major symptoms of depression is lack of drive and motivation.
You seem quite hard on yourself, but you feel the way you do for a reason, and you need to sort that reason out before you'll feel better. "Tricking" yourself will mean that you ignore why you're feeling this way, and even though you might feel better for a while, chances are the same thing will affect you again at a later stage.
Why do you feel so pessimistic about life? Do you want to do well in your exams or do you feel like you're only living up to someone else's expectations? When you find something that makes you happy you won't have to worry about motivation - it provides all the reason you need to get up in the morning.
I think you should talk to someone about how you're feeling. As someone else mentioned, the fact that you are talking about it here means that you do care and you do want to do something about it - get some help to sort it out. Maybe you could go to your GP or try to see a counsellor.
Good Luck
You seem quite hard on yourself, but you feel the way you do for a reason, and you need to sort that reason out before you'll feel better. "Tricking" yourself will mean that you ignore why you're feeling this way, and even though you might feel better for a while, chances are the same thing will affect you again at a later stage.
Why do you feel so pessimistic about life? Do you want to do well in your exams or do you feel like you're only living up to someone else's expectations? When you find something that makes you happy you won't have to worry about motivation - it provides all the reason you need to get up in the morning.
I think you should talk to someone about how you're feeling. As someone else mentioned, the fact that you are talking about it here means that you do care and you do want to do something about it - get some help to sort it out. Maybe you could go to your GP or try to see a counsellor.
Good Luck
Reply 18
Yoda
Sure you can. Whenever you get distracted, point at the TV (or whatever is disctracting you) and slap yourself quickly before you realise. Be careful not to blame someone else and hit them back.
I agree, that tends to waste a lot of time
Good post Yoda.
Another cool thing to do is listen to inspiring music.
Reply 19
i've got a friend like that. she can be happy as larry and then suddenly she gets these mood swings and gets so upset and depressed like you mentioned baove. couple of hours later she's ok. dunno what it is but it aint depression with her. no idea if this will help but thought i'd share.
wizard does make a good point though, right enough
wizard does make a good point though, right enough
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