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No confidence unless drunk
since i started uni i've been drinking alcohol nearly every night. i don't feel as though i need it as such & i don't drink a lot of it (sometimes just a pint) but i feel as tho it gives me my confidence that i don't have unless i have a drink. i think the main reason why i do it is because i don't feel as though i fit in sometimes. i know i have good friends but when it comes to meeting new people i think that when i'm sober i don't have much to say & that i'm not a very interesting person. can anyone offer any advice?
Reply 1
Keep on drinking 
Reply 2
Yeah 
Go with the flow of the drink, it's sending you important messages.
Go with the flow of the drink, it's sending you important messages.Reply 3
...
Reply 4
Anonymous
since i started uni i've been drinking alcohol nearly every night. i don't feel as though i need it as such & i don't drink a lot of it (sometimes just a pint) but i feel as tho it gives me my confidence that i don't have unless i have a drink. i think the main reason why i do it is because i don't feel as though i fit in sometimes. i know i have good friends but when it comes to meeting new people i think that when i'm sober i don't have much to say & that i'm not a very interesting person. can anyone offer any advice?
I'm sure you are a very interesting person 
Just think of all the positive things about you - your hobbies, interests, amusing (though preferably not embarrassing!) anecdotes, etc., and try to start a conversation around those. Often you'll find something totally random you have in common - it was only yesterday that I found out that one person I'm in pretty much every seminar with went to the same Iron Maiden concert as me 
Didn't even know he liked Iron Maiden before! So yeah, just think positive - I'm sure you've got loads of interesting characteristics you could talk to people about -Forgotmytea
Reply 6
Well its probably gonna kill your liver soon, and trust me just try to be confident, i always try this, just think whats the worst i can say/do and you will be swamped with friends like me.
Reply 7
People can sense when you don't believe in yourself and it makes them uneasy. It's very hard to be around someone who's insecure and who needs crutches like alcohol to make them feel better. So the best thing you can do to make friends is have confidence in yourself - this will make other people feel more comfortable around you (because you won't be awkward and they won't feel obliged to make you feel better about yourself).
Ditch the alcohol completely and see how you get on. You could be on the slippery slope towards depending on it and you don't want to go there. Now's the time to focus on building your self esteem, while you're young and in new surroundings.
Ditch the alcohol completely and see how you get on. You could be on the slippery slope towards depending on it and you don't want to go there. Now's the time to focus on building your self esteem, while you're young and in new surroundings.
Reply 8
I have a theory
So did anyone see the film 'Like Mike'? Yeah, that cheesy strange one with the child and the trainers. Well, turned out that he thought these 'magic' shoes were the secret to his amazingness at basketball, but when he had to play without them and had faith in himself he realised that it was actually him, not the shoes, that was amazing.
Yeah, it was vom-worthy. But anyway, the point I'm making is thus: unless you are a supreme lightweight, I doubt that one pint really makes all that difference to your system except make you minutely less inhibited. So how about drinking a little less every night, until you're not actually drinking anything? Because I think you feel like because you've a pint or so inside you, you 'can' be the more extroverted version of yourself - which in actual fact, you can be sober, just lack the confidence to be.
What I'm saying - really badly in a roundabout way - is that you don't need the drink to be this person, because this is the person you naturally are. Therefore, if you drink less and less every night, it'll get to the point where you're used to being this person regardless of whether you drink a thimble-ful of low-alcohol beer or half a bottle of vodka
I don't think you really need the drink at all :]
So did anyone see the film 'Like Mike'? Yeah, that cheesy strange one with the child and the trainers. Well, turned out that he thought these 'magic' shoes were the secret to his amazingness at basketball, but when he had to play without them and had faith in himself he realised that it was actually him, not the shoes, that was amazing.
Yeah, it was vom-worthy. But anyway, the point I'm making is thus: unless you are a supreme lightweight, I doubt that one pint really makes all that difference to your system except make you minutely less inhibited. So how about drinking a little less every night, until you're not actually drinking anything? Because I think you feel like because you've a pint or so inside you, you 'can' be the more extroverted version of yourself - which in actual fact, you can be sober, just lack the confidence to be.
What I'm saying - really badly in a roundabout way - is that you don't need the drink to be this person, because this is the person you naturally are. Therefore, if you drink less and less every night, it'll get to the point where you're used to being this person regardless of whether you drink a thimble-ful of low-alcohol beer or half a bottle of vodka
I don't think you really need the drink at all :]
Reply 9
scribble_girl
I have a theory
So did anyone see the film 'Like Mike'? Yeah, that cheesy strange one with the child and the trainers. Well, turned out that he thought these 'magic' shoes were the secret to his amazingness at basketball, but when he had to play without them and had faith in himself he realised that it was actually him, not the shoes, that was amazing.
Yeah, it was vom-worthy. But anyway, the point I'm making is thus: unless you are a supreme lightweight, I doubt that one pint really makes all that difference to your system except make you minutely less inhibited. So how about drinking a little less every night, until you're not actually drinking anything? Because I think you feel like because you've a pint or so inside you, you 'can' be the more extroverted version of yourself - which in actual fact, you can be sober, just lack the confidence to be.
What I'm saying - really badly in a roundabout way - is that you don't need the drink to be this person, because this is the person you naturally are. Therefore, if you drink less and less every night, it'll get to the point where you're used to being this person regardless of whether you drink a thimble-ful of low-alcohol beer or half a bottle of vodka
I don't think you really need the drink at all :]
So did anyone see the film 'Like Mike'? Yeah, that cheesy strange one with the child and the trainers. Well, turned out that he thought these 'magic' shoes were the secret to his amazingness at basketball, but when he had to play without them and had faith in himself he realised that it was actually him, not the shoes, that was amazing.
Yeah, it was vom-worthy. But anyway, the point I'm making is thus: unless you are a supreme lightweight, I doubt that one pint really makes all that difference to your system except make you minutely less inhibited. So how about drinking a little less every night, until you're not actually drinking anything? Because I think you feel like because you've a pint or so inside you, you 'can' be the more extroverted version of yourself - which in actual fact, you can be sober, just lack the confidence to be.
What I'm saying - really badly in a roundabout way - is that you don't need the drink to be this person, because this is the person you naturally are. Therefore, if you drink less and less every night, it'll get to the point where you're used to being this person regardless of whether you drink a thimble-ful of low-alcohol beer or half a bottle of vodka
I don't think you really need the drink at all :]
Yeah that's just what I was about to say.
(well, not the bit about the film). I'm sure this one pint is just having a placebo effect. You probably are an interesting person. Most people are. Especially the quiet ones.
Just remember that unless you come out with something totally horrible and extreme then the chances are you won't come accross badly at all. You probably don't want to be dependent on alcohol like this and we all know it could have bad effects on your health so try not to feel like you need to drink when, in reality, you probably don't. I find it slightly odd how alcohol makes shy people more confident. I'm quite a confident person, but I haven't always been and back in the days when I was a lot more shy and I would drink, I would become even more shy and pretty much lose all the confidence I had when I was sober. Alcohol had the opposite effect on me than on other people.
Reply 10
Forgotmytea I'm sure you are a very interesting person Just think of all the positive things about you - your hobbies, interests, amusing (though preferably not embarrassing!) anecdotes, etc., and try to start a conversation around those. Often you'll find something totally random you have in common - it was only yesterday that I found out that one person I'm in pretty much every seminar with went to the same Iron Maiden concert as me Didn't even know he liked Iron Maiden before! So yeah, just think positive - I'm sure you've got loads of interesting characteristics you could talk to people about
-Forgotmytea
I'm sure you are a very interesting person Just think of all the positive things about you - your hobbies, interests, amusing (though preferably not embarrassing!) anecdotes, etc., and try to start a conversation around those. Often you'll find something totally random you have in common - it was only yesterday that I found out that one person I'm in pretty much every seminar with went to the same Iron Maiden concert as me Didn't even know he liked Iron Maiden before! So yeah, just think positive - I'm sure you've got loads of interesting characteristics you could talk to people about -Forgotmytea
Your purple font is irritating. Change it back to default black!
Reply 11
I_Surf_Hawaii
I like the way you think...
Grow up and stop encouraging idiots like him to continue killing people. Drinking alcohol is not a good idea. Drinking alcohol is a character flaw. Drinking alcohol will damn you forever. Thou shall not indulge Satan by consuming alcohol.
Reply 12
^^ lol.
Reply 13
Vampyrcorn
^^ lol.
Laugh again when your body breaks down because of the alcohol.
Reply 14
Yeah, it's all well and good drinking it to make you think you're Superman but then you rely on it. What then?
actually drinking in moderation - like this person is (a pint a night...) - has loads of health benefits and your liver can cope with moderate alcohol consumption.
You're not an alcoholic, theres no problem with having a drink to loosen up - either continue or cut back, either way you'll be fine.
so yer, just keep drinking...or don't, you'll be the same person either way
http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/AlcoholAndHealth.html
You're not an alcoholic, theres no problem with having a drink to loosen up - either continue or cut back, either way you'll be fine.
so yer, just keep drinking...or don't, you'll be the same person either way
http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/AlcoholAndHealth.html
Why do you have to drink to fit in?
I know what you mean about drinking more at university as I've found myself doing that, although it is slightly harder as I work in a bar too!
Just last night, I had one pint and decided I didn't want any more to drink so I just stuck to coke, my friends didn't mention it at all...
I know what you mean about drinking more at university as I've found myself doing that, although it is slightly harder as I work in a bar too!
Just last night, I had one pint and decided I didn't want any more to drink so I just stuck to coke, my friends didn't mention it at all...
Reply 17
If you're not interesting sober, how can you be interesting drunk it doesn't change anything but your state of mind. You probably are interesting, you just think you're not, i don't think i'm interesting but some people do.
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