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If you love someone, do you tell them?
I have a specific story, but the question is general.
There's a guy I love - I don't think it's appropriate to tell him (he's older than I am, and he's in an authoritative role) - but I want to find a way to show him that I really care about him, even if I don't come out with, "I love you."
As a general rule, if you love someone, do you tell the person? If it's someone you're not in a relationship with, and just really care about, let's say.
There's a guy I love - I don't think it's appropriate to tell him (he's older than I am, and he's in an authoritative role) - but I want to find a way to show him that I really care about him, even if I don't come out with, "I love you."
As a general rule, if you love someone, do you tell the person? If it's someone you're not in a relationship with, and just really care about, let's say.
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Reply 4
Sometimes its nice to keep it quiet until your totally sure..and let your symptoms do the talking
jaroxski
Inapproriate? What's wrong with being honest? It's better than the good old ask him out for a drink and give subtle hints which he'll never understand.
what if shes just some 16 yr old with a crush on an older teacher? who infact could get into a lot of trouble over nothing...
love is such a strong word, has the OP even spent outside time/alone time with the person etc?
what if he/she is married, has kids etc? suddenly its ok for people to be blurting out that they 'love' someone?
we dont know the full story and im skeptical about using the word anyway
Reply 9
jaroxski
Yes. You tell him directly and seriously so he won't think it's a joke.
Because him thinking it's a joke is the biggest problem when telling a person she's not in a relationship with that she loves him
Grow up.
Reply 14
jaroxski
What's wrong with being honest?
Reply 15
well, i won't go any further into who the person is who i'm talking about...however, i can say with considerable confidence that i shouldn't tell him that i'm in love with him because he is married and has kids.
the trouble is, i feel so strongly about him, i really wish i could do something to show him how much a care about him without making him horribly uncomfortable.
the trouble is, i feel so strongly about him, i really wish i could do something to show him how much a care about him without making him horribly uncomfortable.
Reply 17
Anonymous
well, i won't go any further into who the person is who i'm talking about...however, i can say with considerable confidence that i shouldn't tell him that i'm in love with him because he is married and has kids.
the trouble is, i feel so strongly about him, i really wish i could do something to show him how much a care about him without making him horribly uncomfortable.
the trouble is, i feel so strongly about him, i really wish i could do something to show him how much a care about him without making him horribly uncomfortable.
You've basically just answered your own question there.This is a hopeless situation-what would telling him achieve? Keep quiet and concentrate your efforts on finding someone your own age without a wife and kids!
Reply 18
If he's married with kids then you need to forget about it, hard as it may seem.
Even though you may think otherwise I find it hard to believe that you could possibly "love" him, if he's a person of authority (i.e. a lecturer or what have you). I have no doubt that you can become besotted with him, fall for him and have a "crush" on him (for want of a better word), but unless you've shared your deepest secrets with the guy I personally don't believe you could truly say you "love" him.
Just my opinion though, mind.
Even though you may think otherwise I find it hard to believe that you could possibly "love" him, if he's a person of authority (i.e. a lecturer or what have you). I have no doubt that you can become besotted with him, fall for him and have a "crush" on him (for want of a better word), but unless you've shared your deepest secrets with the guy I personally don't believe you could truly say you "love" him.
Just my opinion though, mind.
haha well i suppose you all have figured out my situation - it wasn't all that challenging, i'll admit. i'm his only student not in graduate school, so we have a different relationship that we would have if he were a lecturer - he's my private teacher at the conservatory i study at. i've been studying with him since i was 12, so i've known him for a long time. i'm 18 now... i know, doesn't make things any better, does it?
i know that it'd be foolish to tell him i love him, but i'll be going off to a university in a different city next year and i'm going to be studying with someone else, so i wish he could know that i care about him now that the year is coming to a close, but at the same time i don't want to make him so uncomfortable that he never wants to speak to me again!
any chance of accomplishing something of this sort, or is it best just to carry on the way things are?
i know that it'd be foolish to tell him i love him, but i'll be going off to a university in a different city next year and i'm going to be studying with someone else, so i wish he could know that i care about him now that the year is coming to a close, but at the same time i don't want to make him so uncomfortable that he never wants to speak to me again!
any chance of accomplishing something of this sort, or is it best just to carry on the way things are?
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