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Finding Males Attractive watch

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    Hiya, I just wanted to know how girls feel about guys xD (scouting out the opposition )
    I mean I'm quite shy and I notice guys have to do all the approaching, so do girls find us guys attractive or just flattered by our attention?

    How come girls don't really approach lads?

    Plus, would you enjoy being with lad or does it feel "forced" just because he made the approach so you obliged?
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    Gender roles.

    It's all a bit sad really
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    Cultural and evolutionary, too detailed for me to go into, that's why the approaching is usually seen as the guy's doing. But girls can approach too, I just think most of us often get the impression that guys are not expecting it so we don't do it. I have heard some guys also say they find it unattractive because they want to be the one do the approaching. Everyone is different. I'm only going to feel uncomfortable being approached if it is by a complete stranger, someone I don't like or someone I've already rejected or don't want to be with. Otherwise it's flattering.

    I don't know what you mean, of course girls find guys attractive, ones with some kind of preference for men anyway, straight, bi etc.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    Cultural and evolutionary, too detailed for me to go into, that's why the approaching is usually seen as the guy's doing. But girls can approach too, I just think most of us often get the impression that guys are not expecting it so we don't do it. I have heard some guys also say they find it unattractive because they want to be the one do the approaching. Everyone is different. I'm only going to feel uncomfortable being approached if it is by a complete stranger, someone I don't like or someone I've already rejected or don't want to be with. Otherwise it's flattering.

    I don't know what you mean, of course girls find guys attractive, ones with some kind of preference for men anyway, straight, bi etc.
    What kind of things are attractive about them?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What kind of things are attractive about them?
    I think it's similar to what you look for in a friend. Someone who holds your attention, is interesting, shares your sense of humour and makes you feel like a better or improved person. So it's going to change dramatically for each person.

    Also, the obvious - appearance and general mannerisms, hygiene, hobbies etc. And obviously how they treat you personally, whether they flirt, compliment you or show a genuine interest in your well-being.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    I think it's similar to what you look for in a friend. Someone who holds your attention, is interesting, shares your sense of humour and makes you feel like a better or improved person. So it's going to change dramatically for each person.

    Also, the obvious - appearance and general mannerisms, hygiene, hobbies etc. And obviously how they treat you personally, whether they flirt, compliment you or show a genuine interest in your well-being.
    So how come it has to be a male rather than a female?
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    If I like a guy I'll tell him

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So how come it has to be a male rather than a female?
    What has to be a male rather than a female?
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    What has to be a male rather than a female?
    A partner or potential partner
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    A partner or potential partner
    For me it doesn't I'm pansexual.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    For me it doesn't I'm pansexual.
    That's cool

    I just feel like as a guy were not liked
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's cool

    I just feel like as a guy were not liked
    I don't know how you can say that! Women often date men for the same reasons men date women, they want a companion and that person fits the bill. What makes you say guys aren't liked? So many women wouldn't go out of their way to please guys with their appearance, sexual skills etc. if they didn't like men.

    We also wouldn't have so many people in the world if women didn't have a reason to like men
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    I don't know how you can say that! Women often date men for the same reasons men date women, they want a companion and that person fits the bill. What makes you say guys aren't liked? So many women wouldn't go out of their way to please guys with their appearance, sexual skills etc. if they didn't like men.

    We also wouldn't have so many people in the world if women didn't have a reason to like men
    Idk I just presumed it was because guys obviously like girls and through being confident and forward, girls oblige or are flattered by the attention

    I don't really want to be with someone who wouldn't want to be with me I guess

    Plus this more relationship anxiety based due to my own experiences
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    I have heard some guys also say they find it unattractive because they want to be the one do the approaching.
    wtf doing the approaching yerself is more effort what is wrong with them
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    (Original post by Retired_Messiah)
    wtf doing the approaching yerself is more effort what is wrong with them
    The people I'm talking about said they found it emasculating which is absurd to me, but I guess I'm not in their shoes. They were in favour of the way it generally is, they wanted to be the chaser not the chased which is weird. Wouldn't everyone be flattered by the chase? :/
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Idk I just presumed it was because guys obviously like girls and through being confident and forward, girls oblige or are flattered by the attention

    I don't really want to be with someone who wouldn't want to be with me I guess

    Plus this more relationship anxiety based due to my own experiences
    Girls have to feel that they would gain something just like guys when they're being pursued for some kind of relationship. Neither would I, that's normal, you shouldn't settle or you won't be happy.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    Cultural and evolutionary, too detailed for me to go into, that's why the approaching is usually seen as the guy's doing. But girls can approach too, I just think most of us often get the impression that guys are not expecting it so we don't do it. I have heard some guys also say they find it unattractive because they want to be the one do the approaching. Everyone is different. I'm only going to feel uncomfortable being approached if it is by a complete stranger, someone I don't like or someone I've already rejected or don't want to be with. Otherwise it's flattering.

    I don't know what you mean, of course girls find guys attractive, ones with some kind of preference for men anyway, straight, bi etc.
    In other words:
    1. If a handsome stranger (as defined however you like) approaches you, it's fine
    2. If a non-handsome (ugly?) stranger approaches you, it's creepy/uncomfortable

    For you it makes sense, for unfortunately, for the stranger doing the approaching it does not make sense. After all, no one but you knows whether a particular stranger is handsome or not.
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    Although it depends on the guy, I'm mostly flattered by the attention, but some people do it wrongly. Like constantly bombarding you with messages, phoning at impossible hours, turning up at your place without telling you beforehand and overstayed your welcome, some of these actions only make you seem like a creep. Please be considerate and do it tactfully!

    I've only approached a guy once, because he is the shy type (so I figured someone has to make the first move), but I think he was just not interested

    I think if the girl's not interested, you'll catch the vibe e.g. replying your messages with just one or two word or giving non-committed responses when you asked to meet up (''maybe'', or "sorry, but I'm busy that day" etc).
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    Traditionally, males approach girls but you do get some girls who make the first move.

    Those girls are girls to be remembered.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    The people I'm talking about said they found it emasculating which is absurd to me, but I guess I'm not in their shoes. They were in favour of the way it generally is, they wanted to be the chaser not the chased which is weird. Wouldn't everyone be flattered by the chase? :/
    I'd be damn flattered if I was chased.
 
 
 
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