The Student Room Group

Alcoholism

My Mum's just revealed that she drinks 2 bottles of wine a night, which has come as a bit of a shock.

I know that that's not a vast amount for an alcoholic, but she is using it as a crutch.

I know it's awful to think like this, but I just can't understand it. Her problems aren't that bad, but she just exagerrates everything in her mind.

She's been advised to just have half a glass of wine each time and top it up with lemonade. I don't think she's addicted to the alcohol, but is addicted to using it as a crutch.

It seems to me that it'd make more sense to just stop drinking it all-together to break the cycle, am I wrong?

I feel like I should just get rid of all the wine in the house, but maybe that wouldn't be such a wise move?

I'm only home at the weekends, I'm away during the week.

Sorry if this isn't written as well as it could be, it just upsets me to think about it.

Reply 1

Domingo
My Mum's just revealed that she drinks 2 bottles of wine a night, which has come as a bit of a shock.

I know that that's not a vast amount for an alcoholic, but she is using it as a crutch.

I know it's awful to think like this, but I just can't understand it. Her problems aren't that bad, but she just exagerrates everything in her mind.

She's been advised to just have half a glass of wine each time and top it up with lemonade. I don't think she's addicted to the alcohol, but is addicted to using it as a crutch.

It seems to me that it'd make more sense to just stop drinking it all-together to break the cycle, am I wrong?

I feel like I should just get rid of all the wine in the house, but maybe that wouldn't be such a wise move?

I'm only home at the weekends, I'm away during the week.

Sorry if this isn't written as well as it could be, it just upsets me to think about it.


Firstly, good for you for trying to help her out, a lot of people would be disspointed and try to move away from it all, good for you for wanting to help. I wouldnt just remove all the wine a) she'll probly get pissed off, b) she can just go buy some more... Im no expert or anything, but here's an example that I think is similar. My uncle smokes... he used to smoke like 2 packs a day and then he decided to quit... so he started smoking less... first one pac, then 5 cigs, then 2, then 1 a day, etc... after 2 months of 1 a day... he started smoking more again... now he's back on 20. I think if you're gunna stop, it has to be cold turkey, it wont work by minimising. Have you asked her if she wants to join like an AA group or sumthing... I know it seams drastic, but just talking about it with people will probably help, its not like rehab or anything. Hope you both get through this :smile:

Reply 2

You can't help her unless she wants to quit. Tackle that first.

Reply 3

It's great that you want to help your mother through this, she will need as much support as she can get. The thing is, you can only help her if she wants help. If your mother doesn't want to give up drinking, theres nothing you can do i'm afraid. She needs to want to quit before you can help.

I don't know too much about adictions i'm afraid, I can only give my own personal opinion but with any addiction, going cold turkey is probably the best option to take. It's extreme, it will be horrible for them and horrible to watch but if someone who has an addiction, such as alcohol abuse, if they have that little bit of alcohol in their system, they will instantly want more. It will never stop at that one drink, and chances are, if they think they are doing well in reducing the amount that they drink, they might decide to drink a wee bit more one day because they can handle it. Truth is, they can't.

If your mum wants to quit, both of you get rid of all the alcohol in the house. You said you aren't around most of the time, thats fine, as long as you support her. Something your mum could do if she decides to quit is, instead of picking up a bottle, pick up the phone and ring you. Doing something like that could help, instead of giving into the craving, talk to someone about it and tell them that your having a problem. It will be difficult to do but that way, she knows that she has her support. I know it might seem like a rubbish idea, but i've used it in the past. I didn't have an addiction problem, it was self harm (thats why i'm anonymous) and instead of hurting myself, I spoke to someone and said "Look, i'm feeling down and want to cut". Having that support really helped me.

For more support, suggest AA. She would really benefit from it.