Turn on thread page Beta

Don't know whether i should ask a girl out or not watch

Announcements
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    i've liked this girl for a while now, but there is a major complication in the way, i've been dealing with cancer for past 6 months. If i was well and not in hospital so often, i would be asking her to hang out, go to the cinema and generally make an effort, but at the moment i spend a lot of time in hospital because of the seriousness of my cancer. I want to tell her how i feel, but i honestly feel greedy and guilty for fancying her.

    I feel that if i tell her i would either be pulling her into a world she doesn't deserve to be in with treatment and everything. And also if i do tell her and declines she might feel guilty for declining a cancer patient, and i don't want that.

    So my question to you is, if you were going through cancer treatment, would you tell your crush how feel about them, or would you hold back your feelings and hope they go away?
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i've liked this girl for a while now, but there is a major complication in the way, i've been dealing with cancer for past 6 months. If i was well and not in hospital so often, i would be asking her to hang out, go to the cinema and generally make an effort, but at the moment i spend a lot of time in hospital because of the seriousness of my cancer. I want to tell her how i feel, but i honestly feel greedy and guilty for fancying her.

    I feel that if i tell her i would either be pulling her into a world she doesn't deserve to be in with treatment and everything. And also if i do tell her and declines she might feel guilty for declining a cancer patient, and i don't want that.

    So my question to you is, if you were going through cancer treatment, would you tell your crush how feel about them, or would you hold back your feelings and hope they go away?
    aww wow this is so sad :/ i think you should tell her you like her i hope you get better.. lost for words.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    You never know unless you ask.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    You never know unless you ask.
    but do you think its fair to her for me to put her on the spot with me in the state i'm in
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    but do you think its fair to her for me to put her on the spot with me in the state i'm in
    If she likes you enough she won't care.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    you won't know if she's willing to date you until you ask

    and i hope your recovery goes smoothly x
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    One thing I've learnt from almost dying 3 years ago is to seize every moment. Ask her out.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    If internet explorer has enough courage to ask you to be reinstalled after you have google chrome, then there shouldn't be a reason for you not asking her out.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i've liked this girl for a while now, but there is a major complication in the way, i've been dealing with cancer for past 6 months. If i was well and not in hospital so often, i would be asking her to hang out, go to the cinema and generally make an effort, but at the moment i spend a lot of time in hospital because of the seriousness of my cancer. I want to tell her how i feel, but i honestly feel greedy and guilty for fancying her.

    I feel that if i tell her i would either be pulling her into a world she doesn't deserve to be in with treatment and everything. And also if i do tell her and declines she might feel guilty for declining a cancer patient, and i don't want that.

    So my question to you is, if you were going through cancer treatment, would you tell your crush how feel about them, or would you hold back your feelings and hope they go away?
    Honestly if the traatmen was working (as in like you will probly not die) tell her she will value all the more when you pull through.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    Aw this reminds me of fault in our stars (which I babbled like a baby). I think you should ask her out! Maybe start by giving her hints that you like her (girls notice hints better than lads). If she responds well I think this will give you the confidence that she won't decline! I hope you get better soon you sound like a sweet lad

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    Honestly I don't think you should. Sorry. I'm sad that you're dealing with cancer but it's not the best time for either of you to be starting a romance. Tell her when you're recovering.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    walk up to her like "such *****", wink and place a hand on her ass. Trust me 100% success rate unbelievable how well it works i shouldn't even be disclosing this information
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    I hope you get better soon, this makes me so sad. I think you should ask her out because life is too short to keep thinking "what if?".

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    I don't know but I wish you get over this bloody cancer.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i've liked this girl for a while now, but there is a major complication in the way, i've been dealing with cancer for past 6 months. If i was well and not in hospital so often, i would be asking her to hang out, go to the cinema and generally make an effort, but at the moment i spend a lot of time in hospital because of the seriousness of my cancer. I want to tell her how i feel, but i honestly feel greedy and guilty for fancying her.

    I feel that if i tell her i would either be pulling her into a world she doesn't deserve to be in with treatment and everything. And also if i do tell her and declines she might feel guilty for declining a cancer patient, and i don't want that.

    So my question to you is, if you were going through cancer treatment, would you tell your crush how feel about them, or would you hold back your feelings and hope they go away?
    Just talk to her , if she really does not want to know you because of your cancer it may seem rude but hey it's her choice just don't judge her to harsh for it. Also you are jumping to conclusions you have not really talked to the girl she could simply not want to get to know you because she is not attracted to you or maybe already has a boyfriend. Think you need to stop thinking about the idea of asking her out first and just get to know her before getting romantic.
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    To all you people saying 'but what if?' I think that should only apply if you're desperately in love with this girl.

    Otherwise frankly I think you're putting her in an extremely awkward position, and pressure on yourself while you're unwell. Don't think it's wise. How is she supposed to turn down the guy with cancer?
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    To all you people saying 'but what if?' I think that should only apply if you're desperately in love with this girl.

    Otherwise frankly I think you're putting her in an extremely awkward position, and pressure on yourself while you're unwell. Don't think it's wise. How is she supposed to turn down the guy with cancer?
    I completely agree with this. I've been on this side of a similar situation before (male) where I was asked out and it near tore my heart out but I decided I couldn't deal with it and I am confident it was the right one. Even so it makes me feel horrible when I think about it.

    I am glad you are being so thoughtful about this and I wish you the very best of luck because you completely deserve a healthy life with love, but now is not the time. Think about what you could put her through. You seem fully aware of this: She may not have cancer but she's just as much a person as you.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: September 13, 2015
Poll
Cats or dogs?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.