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Is she interested in me? Detailed messages but long response times? watch

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    So basically I got talking to a girl on my Facebook a few nights ago. I've never really met or spoken to her in person although I do know we went to school together, I think she was the year below mine. I've seen her on my newsfeed or liking my posts here and there and always fancied talking to her. And the other day she posted a status about something and we just got talking from there really.

    The thing I noticed was that she was sending long messages to me and as was I to her. But she was taking forever to reply. Sometimes I'd see her online at the side and go off again every now and then for hours before she'd reply. I never sent her anymore messages so that I wasn't being pushy, and I also understand she has a life outside of me, especially when we've only really spoke for a few days. But the detailed messages made me think she was interested, but the long time to reply contradicted that really.

    Even last night she was on a night out and she did even apologise for long replies for that particular time as she was out with some friends. I kept telling her it was fine and not to worry and she also kept thanking me for being so understanding. And then conversation ended really because she said she'd talk tomorrow or whenever and she said goodnight.

    So I'm waiting for her to message me really so that I don't look clingy or whatever but I'm debating whether she could possibly be interested or not?
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    I skimmed what you said but there are just certain types of people that send messages like that. I think because they don't socialise online much or they're just busy that they send longer but delayed messages. It doesn't necessarily mean anything unless the content of the messages is suggestive.

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    Man up and ask her if she wants to go out sometime. You'll know then. You're not going to get anywhere over analysing things like this.
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    Ask her? Though it seems she just likes talking to you and don't like that she takes ages to reply. So I wouldn't read a great deal into it.

    Also how long were the messages you were sending to each other?
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    Long time to reply could mean: :hmmmm2:

    1) you're not special, so she doesn't hurry;
    2) you're quite special, so she likes to take her time thinking what to say; or
    3) you're very special, so she likes to hug the enjoyment of replying.

    So...

    you can't judge from that alone. :noway:

    Relax.

    Try asking her for a coffee/drink :beer:
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    that could just be the type of person she is. More importantly: what is the message content like?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So basically I got talking to a girl on my Facebook a few nights ago. I've never really met or spoken to her in person although I do know we went to school together, I think she was the year below mine. I've seen her on my newsfeed or liking my posts here and there and always fancied talking to her. And the other day she posted a status about something and we just got talking from there really.

    The thing I noticed was that she was sending long messages to me and as was I to her. But she was taking forever to reply. Sometimes I'd see her online at the side and go off again every now and then for hours before she'd reply. I never sent her anymore messages so that I wasn't being pushy, and I also understand she has a life outside of me, especially when we've only really spoke for a few days. But the detailed messages made me think she was interested, but the long time to reply contradicted that really.

    Even last night she was on a night out and she did even apologise for long replies for that particular time as she was out with some friends. I kept telling her it was fine and not to worry and she also kept thanking me for being so understanding. And then conversation ended really because she said she'd talk tomorrow or whenever and she said goodnight.

    So I'm waiting for her to message me really so that I don't look clingy or whatever but I'm debating whether she could possibly be interested or not?
    I'm female and I know I do this a lot; its never (or almost never!) because I don't want to talk to a guy, I'm really easily distracted so I might leave Facebook open on my laptop and then not come back to it for a few hours, or if I'm out and about I'm never on Facebook long enough to talk. If she's not doing the "seen at 13.05" thing and is actually sending detailed messages then she definitely cares about you...whether she is romantically interested in you is not as easy to answer to be honest. I barely send long messages to anyone; if I do then it's because I care and want to talk to them, so from the sounds of things, she likes you, but as others have said, only you can broach anything deeper?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So basically I got talking to a girl on my Facebook a few nights ago. I've never really met or spoken to her in person although I do know we went to school together, I think she was the year below mine. I've seen her on my newsfeed or liking my posts here and there and always fancied talking to her. And the other day she posted a status about something and we just got talking from there really.

    The thing I noticed was that she was sending long messages to me and as was I to her. But she was taking forever to reply. Sometimes I'd see her online at the side and go off again every now and then for hours before she'd reply. I never sent her anymore messages so that I wasn't being pushy, and I also understand she has a life outside of me, especially when we've only really spoke for a few days. But the detailed messages made me think she was interested, but the long time to reply contradicted that really.

    Even last night she was on a night out and she did even apologise for long replies for that particular time as she was out with some friends. I kept telling her it was fine and not to worry and she also kept thanking me for being so understanding. And then conversation ended really because she said she'd talk tomorrow or whenever and she said goodnight.

    So I'm waiting for her to message me really so that I don't look clingy or whatever but I'm debating whether she could possibly be interested or not?
    This phenomenon may be in part due to the increasing convergence of 'IM' and 'PM' facilities on popular social media sites, where one person (i.e. me) will favour a traditional long-form style of communication via the classic 'PM' interface which is more akin to e-mail, whilst the other will be rattling off instantaneous replies in a pop-up 'IM' box à la Skype, Kik or WhatsApp, yet both share the same correspondence chain meaning that—on OkCupid, for example—depending on which interface has been adopted by either party I can risk looking as though I've taken half an hour to compose a detailed, multi-paragraph response via Instant Messenger, and conversely they can give the impression of having sent an incredibly perfunctory one-line opener by e-mail; even though, if transposed, both would be perfectly congruent with the prevailing etiquette of the respective formats.

    It's therefore entirely possible she's more inclined towards the 'PM' camp, setting aside half an hour to give considered replies, whilst you're more spontaneous, dynamically interspersing your slightly more concise 'IM's with other activities which don't really allow for uninterrupted focus. In any event, I wouldn't read too much into it: not everyone prioritises this sort of thing.
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    (Original post by PalindromeGirl)
    I'm female and I know I do this a lot; its never (or almost never!) because I don't want to talk to a guy, I'm really easily distracted so I might leave Facebook open on my laptop and then not come back to it for a few hours, or if I'm out and about I'm never on Facebook long enough to talk. If she's not doing the "seen at 13.05" thing and is actually sending detailed messages then she definitely cares about you...whether she is romantically interested in you is not as easy to answer to be honest. I barely send long messages to anyone; if I do then it's because I care and want to talk to them, so from the sounds of things, she likes you, but as others have said, only you can broach anything deeper?
    Ditto this; I'm notoriously insular, if not exactly reclusive.
 
 
 
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