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Am I boring cos I don't wanna go out to 'exclusive' clubs? watch

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    My friend works for website I won't be specific about in entertainment and she often gets into 'exclusive' clubs and meets people who frankly I've never even heard of, lately she has been trying to get me to go out more cos she knows I'm single. She has invited me to this club saying blah blah how exclusive it is and who'll be there and the men I could meet. She found out I'm living in Bethnel Green and she's using this against me to trap me in saying she booked a hotel so we can stay out etc.

    On one hand I feel like should I be really grateful and think she's trying to be supportive and means well? But then she goes and texts me 'you ain't gonna meet someone staying at home eating cheese! Don't get boring we're all going' and I feel annoyed, I just want to stay in and get my head round things. This whole party lifestyle in proximity with z list **** heads doesn't sound fun or impressive to me it seems really vacuous and depressing

    Input please am I being miserable as usual and holding myself back or am I right to want to say no to these things especially as I'm newly single and not ready to meet anybody? I feel like I can't talk to my other friends who are going cos I don't want to keep being captain bringdown

    Everything sucks right now can't believe I'm moaning about this on a forum
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    Oh your single. I had no idea.

    I think if you don't want to do it then don't do it. Your friends should supportive and not try and force you into things. My friends always wanted me to go camping, so I finally went and they stole my blanket and pillow for themselves. I never went camping again. I am not long friends with them.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    My friend works for website I won't be specific about in entertainment and she often gets into 'exclusive' clubs and meets people who frankly I've never even heard of, lately she has been trying to get me to go out more cos she knows I'm single. She has invited me to this club saying blah blah how exclusive it is and who'll be there and the men I could meet. She found out I'm living in Bethnel Green and she's using this against me to trap me in saying she booked a hotel so we can stay out etc.

    On one hand I feel like should I be really grateful and think she's trying to be supportive and means well? But then she goes and texts me 'you ain't gonna meet someone staying at home eating cheese! Don't get boring we're all going' and I feel annoyed, I just want to stay in and get my head round things. This whole party lifestyle in proximity with z list **** heads doesn't sound fun or impressive to me it seems really vacuous and depressing

    Input please am I being miserable as usual and holding myself back or am I right to want to say no to these things especially as I'm newly single and not ready to meet anybody? I feel like I can't talk to my other friends who are going cos I don't want to keep being captain bringdown

    Everything sucks right now can't believe I'm moaning about this on a forum
    Of course you're night to say no if you feel like you need time to figure things out, especially if you've just come out of a relationship. Some people need time to get back into it. If you tell your friend you need time she should understand?
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    I thought your were with that black dude
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    I'm gonna give you the advice everyone gets/gives; telling her how you feel will be the best way to get the resolution you want from the situation. Whether you want to go out or not, you should do what you* want to do.

    With the above said, I know what you are feeling. I have something I currently feel like I should do but don't want to - I don't know what I'm going to do yet either.

    You can inbox me if you wanna talk ^_^
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    My friend works for website I won't be specific about in entertainment and she often gets into 'exclusive' clubs and meets people who frankly I've never even heard of, lately she has been trying to get me to go out more cos she knows I'm single. She has invited me to this club saying blah blah how exclusive it is and who'll be there and the men I could meet. She found out I'm living in Bethnel Green and she's using this against me to trap me in saying she booked a hotel so we can stay out etc.

    On one hand I feel like should I be really grateful and think she's trying to be supportive and means well? But then she goes and texts me 'you ain't gonna meet someone staying at home eating cheese! Don't get boring we're all going' and I feel annoyed, I just want to stay in and get my head round things. This whole party lifestyle in proximity with z list **** heads doesn't sound fun or impressive to me it seems really vacuous and depressing

    Input please am I being miserable as usual and holding myself back or am I right to want to say no to these things especially as I'm newly single and not ready to meet anybody? I feel like I can't talk to my other friends who are going cos I don't want to keep being captain bringdown

    Everything sucks right now can't believe I'm moaning about this on a forum
    The choice is yours for the taking if you don't want to go just tell her straight up also clubs are the worst places to meet decent guys.
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    Before I got more in to Islam I used to go to Underground House type clubs (Fire, Egg..that ilk). Miles better than any of that West End China White style vibe because everyone is there for the music and only that.
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    (Original post by StainesMassif)
    Before I got more in to Islam I used to go to Underground House type clubs (Fire, Egg..that ilk). Miles better than any of that West End China White style vibe because everyone is there for the music and only that.
    And now you're a Muslim, are you going to bomb those places because music is haram?
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    Oh so you are not a dude after all, now to the question of whether you are really English
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    (Original post by anonymous)
    and now you're a muslim, are you going to bomb those places because music is haram?
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    looooooooooooooooool
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    what happened to the black dude?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    And now you're a Muslim, are you going to bomb those places because music is haram?
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    I don't think music really does any good ultimately. Just adolescent guff.

    But the underground movement has more going for it than that west end ****.
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    (Original post by william walker)
    Oh your single. I had no idea.

    I think if you don't want to do it then don't do it. Your friends should supportive and not try and force you into things. My friends always wanted me to go camping, so I finally went and they stole my blanket and pillow for themselves. I never went camping again. I am not long friends with them.
    And here. we. go.
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    (Original post by Jared44)
    And here. we. go.
    No. I just thought she was still going out with someone. I have no interest in her or being thirsty with her.
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    (Original post by Jared44)
    And here. we. go.
    Grow up
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    Thanks for advice apart from the downright bizarre religion stuff and the rude 'what happened to the black dude?' questions

    I left him cos I can't have children, no I haven't told him, yes that's a questionable decision

    I'm glad not everyone is into these things I really don't want to go. My friend is messaging some guy from ****ing Geordie Shore and genuinely telling me about it like this will want to make me come out more. I just want to stay in forever at the moment. And if I was feeling like going out I don't want to go to a bar full of empty headed people

    I don't know what to do. Blah.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    Grow up
    What?
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    (Original post by Jared44)
    What?
    Acting like that guy was making something out of me being single - he was speaking to me that's all. It's a forum we can't even see what each other looks like.

    Although to be fair I probably look a mess anyway. Have dropped down to size 6 with the not eating. Not exactly feeling nightclub-y.
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    (Original post by AvaAdore)
    Acting like that guy was making something out of me being single - he was speaking to me that's all. It's a forum we can't even see what each other looks like.

    Although to be fair I probably look a mess anyway. Have dropped down to size 6 with the not eating. Not exactly feeling nightclub-y.
    Only because it was william walker, some of his posts aren't exactly orthodox.

    Talking like that by, with such a negative attitude is probably what sways people away, I know it would do with me.
    You really need to think positive about things.

    I really cannot stand all of this self assessment negativity that people come out with, it's the main reason people don't approach you, it's not hard to sense, in person when somebody isn't comfortable with themselves.
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    Invite a friend who you can make fun of all the people with, or try and find someone in the club you can do that with; who knows, maybe there will be your male equivalent there who secretly doesn't enjoy those kind of events either.
    Failing that, it may be a prudent option to just go and suffer; it depends on how deep your connection is with the girl that invited you. If you don't go you are, on some level, saying that you don't think your friends choice of evening out is worthwhile and, by extension, her job is also a waste of time.
    Unfortunately adult life is full of going to ****ty events just to please people; it's a case of picking and choosing your battles so that you don't end up dying in utter solitude.
 
 
 
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