The Student Room Group

Teachers really getting me down

I go to a super-competitive, very successful private girls' school in London and the attitude is very cut-throat and 'As or nothing.' Recently I've been going through a bit of a crisis, to do with family, friends, university etc and my work hasn't been particularly good.

The thing which really gets me is that all my teachers have just jumped on me mercilessly, emailing me, telling me to get extra help, talking to me seriously every lesson - all because I've been getting a few Bs and Cs. They act like I'm a complete and utter failure, constantly telling me they're 'very concerned' and asking 'what's wrong.' i don't feel like im obliged to share my private life with them when I am still a very good student. I'm sitting my A2s in June and currently getting Bs and Cs which I'm sure will go up to As. I have 10A*s at GCSE and 4 As at AS-Level.
WHY WON'T THEY LEAVE ME ALONE?!
This may sound ridiculous but it's really getting me down. They keep telling me I'm going to fail me exams but I'm not.

What do you think? Do they have a right to be so hard on me after I've proved time and time again that I am a very good student?
Reply 1
Perhaps because you are usually an excellent, straight As student, when your grades drop they are concerned because its not up to your usual standard. If they do not know you are having difficulties at home then from their point of view your work is getting worse for no reason - they may feel that you've stopped caring about work or something, which may be a cause for concern.
If you told them that you are having a few problems (not necessarily tell them the exact details, just that there are other things going on) and that you think it's a temporary situation then they will probably be more understanding and get off your back for a bit.
Reply 2
the easiest way to get them off your back is to put in a few good A grade pieces of work!
Reply 3
I'd rather have teachers like that then ones who dont care? :redface:
Tell them you're going through some issue with your family and that your effort will be back to normal as soon as its sorted out.
Anonymous
I go to a super-competitive, very successful private girls' school in London and the attitude is very cut-throat and 'As or nothing.' Recently I've been going through a bit of a crisis, to do with family, friends, university etc and my work hasn't been particularly good.

The thing which really gets me is that all my teachers have just jumped on me mercilessly, emailing me, telling me to get extra help, talking to me seriously every lesson - all because I've been getting a few Bs and Cs. They act like I'm a complete and utter failure, constantly telling me they're 'very concerned' and asking 'what's wrong.' i don't feel like im obliged to share my private life with them when I am still a very good student. I'm sitting my A2s in June and currently getting Bs and Cs which I'm sure will go up to As. I have 10A*s at GCSE and 4 As at AS-Level.
WHY WON'T THEY LEAVE ME ALONE?!
This may sound ridiculous but it's really getting me down. They keep telling me I'm going to fail me exams but I'm not.

What do you think? Do they have a right to be so hard on me after I've proved time and time again that I am a very good student?


I actually feel really bad for you. I went to a similar school and I know how intense the pressure can be. mine was a boarding school so i even had the house mistresses on my back in the evening too. :rolleyes:

You're not a failure. They know this. The thing is, you aren't doing as well as normal. Don't worry about this - you're entirely right about your grades going up before your exams. I have no doubt that they will.

I distinctly remember being told I was 'tragically wasting my life' after receiving a low A in a history essay once. My rows of A grades would evaporate into nothing the moment one mid term essay got a 'bad' grade. (and I use the word 'bad' in the loosest sense possible). Try not to let it get to you, they probably think that they are motivating you. It's stupid, but it's true. Many of the teachers I've come accross seem to think that the best way to encourage someone to get good grades is to consistently criticize and tell them that they aren't good enough. For some people this is true, but sometimes a slightly more encouraging and positive attitude would be easier to cope with and be more effective.

It sounds like too simplistic advice to be taken seriously, but you just have to let it go. It sounds like it's the least of your problems at the moment. You do have time to pull your grades up and with a suitable revision plan you will get the grades you need. You don't owe anything to your teachers. You'll get the right grades in the end, but for now just focus on straightening out your life (personal and academic issues) without paying any attention to what your teachers say. Delete the emails and focus on yourself.

I think there's a lot of pressure on your teachers to get the right grades out of you too, so try not to hold it against them too much. :smile:

And remember, you are lucky to go to such a good school. I know you probably get reminded of that every day and told to be forever grateful :rolleyes: but this trouble will pass and you'll come out of it with fantastic opportunities. It's just a phase.. I know it sucks but you'll just have to grit your teeth and bear it for the next few months. It can't be that long until the Easter holidays, surely?

You'll be ok. :smile:
Reply 6
wish i went to a school like that
Reply 7
sarforaz
I'd rather have teachers like that then ones who dont care? :redface:
They're not exactly bummed about the OP's wellbeing and future, but rather about the posh school's reputation.
Reply 8
Yeh tbh I'd try and tell your parents how you feel because I'm sure they'd care that you were unhappy. If they don't then it's ok because it's over in like 6 months! Just keep your eyes on escaping, what do you have planned for the future?
Just put in the A grade work like lodzinski said.

1) They'll leave you alone.
2) An A is better than a B or a C
3) You will feel better in yourself for getting them
4) You are obvioulsy capable of it.

?!
Reply 10
LipGloss
They're not exactly bummed about the OP's wellbeing and future, but rather about the posh school's reputation.

Perhaps but at the end of the day, the results will stay with the OP, not go to the school!
Reply 11
tell em to get bent. Why is there never any good threads about classic b/c students. We need more kids in good public sector schools learning how to take the piss out of each other.
LipGloss
They're not exactly bummed about the OP's wellbeing and future, but rather about the posh school's reputation.


You obviously haven't met any private school teachers. They do care about pupils. Believe me they do.
teachers get paid depending on how well their pupils do...as long as you improve before/during your exams they'll stop worrying.
Reply 14
tanusha-tomsk
You obviously haven't met any private school teachers. They do care about pupils. Believe me they do.

:ditto: I go to an all girls' state school, and while it is no secret that there is a great emphasis on results; the teachers still do care about the pupils and their wellbeing on the whole.

To the OP- I know your private life is nothing to do with your teachers, but I think they are genuinely concerned for you, and for that reason are enquiring about it. Have you tried talking to someone about your problems? It depends on the nature of the problem of course, but it might help to open up to someone. I hope you feel better soon! :hugs:
Reply 15
Anonymous
I go to a super-competitive, very successful private girls' school in London and the attitude is very cut-throat and 'As or nothing.' Recently I've been going through a bit of a crisis, to do with family, friends, university etc and my work hasn't been particularly good.

The thing which really gets me is that all my teachers have just jumped on me mercilessly, emailing me, telling me to get extra help, talking to me seriously every lesson - all because I've been getting a few Bs and Cs. They act like I'm a complete and utter failure, constantly telling me they're 'very concerned' and asking 'what's wrong.' i don't feel like im obliged to share my private life with them when I am still a very good student. I'm sitting my A2s in June and currently getting Bs and Cs which I'm sure will go up to As. I have 10A*s at GCSE and 4 As at AS-Level.
WHY WON'T THEY LEAVE ME ALONE?!
This may sound ridiculous but it's really getting me down. They keep telling me I'm going to fail me exams but I'm not.

What do you think? Do they have a right to be so hard on me after I've proved time and time again that I am a very good student?



I go to a school just like yours. They treat each and every single one of us like that. The A students get hassle and the students on the Bs and Cs are left alone. How stupid is that?!

The best thing you can do is just keep your head down, ignore your teachers and then rub your good results in their faces come results day!
Reply 16
i wish i went to a school like that, some of my teachers don't care if you pass or not. If you explain to your teachers that you're going through a bad time i'm sure they'll lay off a bit, they're probably just concerned.
Reply 17
I'm in a similar situation right now, and I don't really want to go into the nitty gritty because I'm sick of discussing it offline, never mind online, but eventually they will leave you alone. I've found it hard when the teachers have been on my back, one even ringing up my home to check I wasn't anorexic, just because I was quite down and because I'm naturally thin, so that must be the problem type-of-thing. Best thing to do I suppose is try to not let it show (I should take my own advice!) that you're upset, and try to work the grades back up again. I'm like you - I thrive on encouragement, and like to know when I'm doing well, because I'm critical enough of myself as it is, so when a teacher starts having a go as well it can be quite crushing.

We'll live, let's look forward to uni!
Reply 18
Thank god for state colleges where all they do is say you could do so well, you're bright but if you throw away your education that's fine you can always come back next year. They don't really mind although they encourage you to do your best a bit, because if you **** up they still get paid and you come back for another year. Also my college operates on a policy of extreme freedom!