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Parents want me to come back every single weekend... watch

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    I live with my mum and I'm off to uni next week. My mum has always been incredibly overprotective and refuses to give me any independence.

    She wants me back every weekend (or at least every other weekend) since my university is 40 mins away. I've already told her that I won't be able to visit that often because I have a few societies that meet over the weekend and I feel that staying at uni is important for me to make friends (especially in the first few weeks).

    It's gotten to the point where she's emotionally blackmailing me -seriously - (calling me selfish) so that I would come over every weekend.

    What do I do here? I really don't want to come back every week
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    Just don't. What's she going to do, drive up and shout at you?
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    Just don't go back every weekend. She'll have to deal with it. I know that might be difficult to do but you don't want to build any more resentment towards your mum because she's forcing you to do something you don't want to.
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    (Original post by caveman1234)
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    Email/text on Thursday warning that you won't be coming back at the weekend, but you'll phone her on Sunday evening. When you phone, be full of good positive news about how much you love Uni, and if she turns it into a whinge fest, stop phoning as well. She'll work it out.
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    Well if it was me (blunt person) i would just tell my parents to stop and let me have my own independent life and socialize.. You can always go home over holidays.. In my opinion i don't feel its necessary to see parents every weekend and you don't seem to live too far away from your home.
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    Tell them that you have loads of work and you're busy with friends.

    They should understand that you're at uni and you'll have a social life and studying to do.

    My parents go 11 weeks without seeing me (I do live a lot further away) and it may be hard but they appreciate that I'm busy.
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    (Original post by caveman1234)
    I live with my mum and I'm off to uni next week. My mum has always been incredibly overprotective and refuses to give me any independence.

    She wants me back every weekend (or at least every other weekend) since my university is 40 mins away. I've already told her that I won't be able to visit that often because I have a few societies that meet over the weekend and I feel that staying at uni is important for me to make friends (especially in the first few weeks).

    It's gotten to the point where she's emotionally blackmailing me -seriously - (calling me selfish) so that I would come over every weekend.

    What do I do here? I really don't want to come back every week
    I think she is worried about missing you. You will have work/assignments to do and I'm sure she'll want you to do well

    Make sure you call her/skype/yahoo messenger or whatever you prefer - make sure you sound really busy with work [don't talk about going out!]
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    Just tried talking to her - she screamed at me and told me I don't need to come back ever fml
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    (Original post by caveman1234)
    Just tried talking to her - she screamed at me and told me I don't need to come back ever fml
    She's scared of losing you and being on her own and thinking you'll never come back. Give it a little while to calm down and then reassure her that you still love her and won't abandon her when you have a new life.
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    (Original post by Mactotaur)
    Just don't. What's she going to do, drive up and shout at you?
    It's alright until you want to move in and find yourself locked out! Show respect to those who house you but you don't have to take it too far.
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    (Original post by gundog48)
    It's alright until you want to move in and find yourself locked out! Show respect to those who house you but you don't have to take it too far.
    Ha, good point.
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    (Original post by caveman1234)
    I live with my mum and I'm off to uni next week. My mum has always been incredibly overprotective and refuses to give me any independence.

    She wants me back every weekend (or at least every other weekend) since my university is 40 mins away. I've already told her that I won't be able to visit that often because I have a few societies that meet over the weekend and I feel that staying at uni is important for me to make friends (especially in the first few weeks).

    It's gotten to the point where she's emotionally blackmailing me -seriously - (calling me selfish) so that I would come over every weekend.

    What do I do here? I really don't want to come back every week
    At the end of the day, this is your life and you've got to do what you want to do. Yes she's your mother but she can't emotionally blackmail you. You've got to enjoy yourself and live your life and she's got to understand that. She's got to come to terms with it! I'd suggest just not going back and only go when you feel you need too. I know it sounds tough but I think it'll help both her and you.
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    send her bare random texts like
    "yo matt, sorry i didnt come to the rave got arrested for assualt"
    then be liike, "oops wrong person"

    bare funny when she has anyuersim
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    (Original post by caveman1234)
    Just tried talking to her - she screamed at me and told me I don't need to come back ever fml
    just don't mention it any more dont press the issue. then when youre at uni tell her you wont be coming back every weekend.

    don't understand how some parents can act this way towards their children.
 
 
 
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