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I'm in a pickle

Sorry this is probally everywhere here .... but could you read, sorry its long.
When I started sixth form I made a good friend with this guy, he was really nice etc. but hen he started ot have a little crush on me, but after he relised I wasn't interested he went onto annother girl. Anyway, me and this guy became closer and now 18 months on down the line we are so close, like the closest I've ever been with anyone, we go away for weekends, go shopping, go to the beach, take each other out for lunch or just hang around each others houses. It did get to a point where I thought I liked him in more then a friend way, however after looking at it I reliased it wouldn't work as I don't like clingy people (which is him) as I need my space and I like going out to parties/clubbing, but he would prefer a night in. and I would hurt him. alot.
Anyway, Last night he came over and wanted to have a "serious chat" as I was dating his best friend and he didn't like it. He said he loves me, or as close to and that before when I said we couldn't date (a while ago) becuase I would hurt him (becuase in all honesty I get around a bit) he said that I've hurt him more by dating his best friend.
After he said he loved me I started crying and I hardly ever cry (unhealthy I know) but ... Why? I was thinking it over today and I just feel like I've lost the closest person to me, I only wanted to talk to him about how I feel but I couldn't. Somebody said I was using him as a safty net as I could go off and do something stupid but he would allways be there and I see their point ... But now I don't know what to do. I can't date him becuase I'm not emotionally all there, I'm either great friends with someone or sleeping with them, there is no over lap. But we can't stay as we are ... Sorry this was long, but I just want a smige of advice? xx

Reply 1

Tyrannosaurus Cal

I'm not an expert on this...I would tend to be the kind of guy that you say your friend is!

But maybe the fact that he overstepped the boundaries of your friendship means that you feel that you might lose the closeness. I think you're right, if you did anything with him, you'd probably lose someone who's really important to you.

Give it time, and he'll get over his feelings. Us men are simple souls; all the time I get confused and think I fancy someone I'm close to, when actually if it came to the crunch, it'd be like kissing my sister. I'm sure in a bit he's going to realise his feelings for you are more platonic than anything, or he'll jsut get over it, and you'll be back to normal!

Good luck :smile: