My GF is on the verge of proposing?

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BruceJender
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I posted as Anon beforehand, but I find that I have to post again to avoid having to wait for the Mods to review it.

As I've said in my Anon post, it turns out my girlfriend of (almost) 4 years is about to propose to me. According to my closest female friend, she's been planning this for months right under my nose.

We met at school and dated for the last 3 months. Eventually we moved to seperate Universities but lived only 20 miles apart. We're both in our second year and both 21.

I know it's sounds too soon to get engaged, but I love her deeply and she obviously can't wait any longer.


Can I get some sound advice form you guys - anything really.

I would love to propose to her myself, but I haven't got the money together for her ring and time is short!!


Thanks
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Betelgeuse-
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What exactly do you want us to say?
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scrotgrot
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Advice for the proposal? Well traditionally you say yes if you want to get married and no if you don't

Congratulations!
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LillyLisaa
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Well, if she already has everything ready and you want to get married then let her propose
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BruceJender
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
What exactly do you want us to say?

Well I just want to figure out some things:

1)Should I just through with it. I do want to propose to her, but I won't say no when she does.

2) I rake up enough money to get her a ring and propose at the same time she does... ?

3) Any better ideas you can give?
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BruceJender
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(Original post by scrotgrot)
Advice for the proposal? Well traditionally you say yes if you want to get married and no if you don't

Congratulations!

I'm going to say yes no matter what lol...

I just really want to propose too myself.

It's a difficult situation because this really is a once in a lifetime thing...
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BruceJender
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(Original post by LillyLisaa)
Well, if she already has everything ready and you want to get married then let her propose

I will say yes, no matter what, but I really want to propose to her!
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Betelgeuse-
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(Original post by BruceJender)
Well I just want to figure out some things:

1)Should I just through with it. I do want to propose to her, but I won't say no when she does.

2) I rake up enough money to get her a ring and propose at the same time she does... ?

3) Any better ideas you can give?
1) Of course? If you want to be married to her then say yes!

2) The ring is not important. Just enjoy the moment and worry about saving for the ring over the next few months. Theres no time limit on the length of your engagement

3) What is it thats worrying you, not having the money for a ring?
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TorpidPhil
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You're not even outside of university though? Like... You haven't got started on career progression and stuff? Your life isn't even going on much at all. You haven't lived with one another? How can you propose to one another?

I'd tell her "yes" to save her the embarrassment, give her some thoughtful gift later on (ASAP) and some wonderful reward sex, of course, AND then tell her she's crazy and needs to chill out a bit when we're alone have some time to talk. How the hell can 21 year olds be proposing to one another lol...
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BruceJender
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
1) Of course? If you want to be married to her then say yes!

2) The ring is not important. Just enjoy the moment and worry about saving for the ring over the next few months. Theres no time limit on the length of your engagement

3) What is it thats worrying you, not having the money for a ring?

What's worrying me most is not having the time to get the money for the ring!

Wouldn't it be awkward if I proposed at the same time as her without a ring?


I'm really stressing out here!
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Betelgeuse-
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(Original post by BruceJender)
What's worrying me most is not having the time to get the money for the ring!

Wouldn't it be awkward if I proposed at the same time as her without a ring?


I'm really stressing out here!
Well it depends on your gf. If she is one of these women who judges your marriage proposal based on the amount of ££££ you spent on the ring, you are making a big mistake imo.

Your both 21 year old students. Rings are expensive. Give her something symbolic and tell her you need a X amount of time to get her the real thing

Marriage is expensive for everyone, let alone a student
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BruceJender
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(Original post by TorpidPhil)
You're not even outside of university though? Like... You haven't got started on career progression and stuff? Your life isn't even going on much at all. You haven't lived with one another? How can you propose to one another?

I'd tell her "yes" to save her the embarrassment, give her some thoughtful gift later on (ASAP) and some wonderful reward sex, of course, AND then tell her she's crazy and needs to chill out a bit when we're alone have some time to talk. How the hell can 21 year olds be proposing to one another lol...
What are you implying here?

We're getting engaged not married quite yet. Why, on God's green Earth, would I call her crazy?? as if that's going to end well... :rolleyes:

Would you treat your (potential) future wife/fiancée like that?



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BruceJender
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
Well it depends on your gf. If she is one of these women who judges your marriage proposal based on the amount of ££££ you spent on the ring, you are making a big mistake imo.

Your both 21 year old students. Rings are expensive. Give her something symbolic and tell her you need a X amount of time to get her the real thing

Marriage is expensive for everyone, let alone a student

We know eachother very well, she isn't that materialistic and definitely wouldn't expect me to bust the bank for a ring.

I could get her a decent but not over-priced ring and then tell her I'd get her a permanent one when I have the means... but again, this is the proposal.
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Betelgeuse-
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(Original post by BruceJender)
We know eachother very well, she isn't that materialistic and definitely wouldn't expect me to bust the bank for a ring.

I could get her a decent but not over-priced ring and then tell her I'd get her a permanent one when I have the means... but again, this is the proposal.
Just give her nothing. It really shouldnt be important, its about commiting to marrying her and being together for the rest of your life. Its possible she would be prefer to shop around for her engagement ring anyway!
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TorpidPhil
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(Original post by BruceJender)
What are you implying here?

We're getting engaged not married quite yet. Why, on God's green Earth, would I call her crazy?? as if that's going to end well... :rolleyes:

Would you treat your (potential) future wife/fiancée like that?


It means the same thing is you say yes. Just means you have to start saving up for the marriage lol. I mean... it's just silly tbh the whole thing. I have no intention of marrying.
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BruceJender
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
Just give her nothing. It really shouldnt be important, its about commiting to marrying her and being together for the rest of your life. Its possible she would be prefer to shop around for her engagement ring anyway!

I've still got roughly 5 days to think about this all.

She hasn't spoken about her plans yet, so I don't even know where she's thinking of doing it.
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BruceJender
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(Original post by TorpidPhil)
It means the same thing is you say yes. Just means you have to start saving up for the marriage lol. I mean... it's just silly tbh the whole thing. I have no intention of marrying.

Figures.

I can put some money aside.
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stargirl63
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(Original post by BruceJender)
I've still got roughly 5 days to think about this all.

She hasn't spoken about her plans yet, so I don't even know where she's thinking of doing it.
Propose without a ring, there's a lot of people who do this. Then in your own time, you can get a ring, save up, she can choose the one she wants etc. Do you feel in the future, you will regret not proposing to her yourself?
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emilyb96
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Why not let her propose, if she's been to all this effort, and you want to get married anyway? If you want to make a gesture as well, accept her proposal, and make a "ceremony"-like thing about giving her the ring, once you've had time to save for it. That way everyone's happy - you're engaged (which is the main thing!!) and you've both made a gesture about becoming engaged.
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BruceJender
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OK, a little update.

So far my GF hasn't shown any signs she's 'hiding' something. She's acting relatively normal.

I'm going to a bar tonight with some mates... hopefully this will make me relax. I've also confined to my best male friend about this.
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