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what is emotional maturity?

as said in question.

people say that some 16 year olds are emotionally mature and some 20 year olds are immature. i always try to do the mature thing altho a lot of the time it backfires. but ive always wondered how to define emotional maturity. and what is maturity...

Reply 1

Riddy

Good question, Ive heard that it is taking responsibility and not blaming others but my parents are always blaming others and work for being tired/stressed. It is probably not being petty or getting annoyed at small things.

Reply 2

coldplasma

16

I always thought emotional maturity was when you understood other people's feelings and didn't be a drama-queen about the most trivial things!

Reply 3

hannah_dru

2

I couldn't realy define it, but I've felt it since I was 9 years old.

Reply 4

Seoid

I think emotional maturity has a lot different facets:

1. Understanding other people's emotions and what might be causing them. Using this understanding in a responsible way by being considerate and helpful.

2. Not manipulating the emotions of others or using emotional blackmail.

3. Most importantly (I think): Understanding your own emotions and dealing with them in a healthy, non-destructive way.

Reply 5

Romana87

I wouldn't be able to define it for sure but apparently girls get it four years before blokes.

Reply 6

Chumbaniya

17

Seoid

2. Not manipulating the emotions of others or using emotional blackmail.

I don't think emotional maturity has anything to do with being nice to people. Indeed, I think to be most sucessful at manipulating someone else's emotions, you need to be emotionally mature yourself; at least to a greater extent than the person you are manipulating is.

Reply 7

Seoid

Chumbaniya

I don't think emotional maturity has anything to do with being nice to people. Indeed, I think to be most sucessful at manipulating someone else's emotions, you need to be emotionally mature yourself; at least to a greater extent than the person you are manipulating is.

I don't agree, because I think immature people can be manipulative without realising it. I also think maturity implies that you will not be manipulative because you realise that it's wrong and counterproductive.

Reply 8

Chumbaniya

17

Seoid

I don't agree, because I think immature people can be manipulative without realising it. I also think maturity implies that you will not be manipulative because you realise that it's wrong and counterproductive.

I was taking it to mean deliberate manipulation, which of course you couldn't do accidentally.

I feel it's far from obvious that morality and maturity should be associated with each other. It occurs to me that maturity involves understanding that you can't view the world through the lens of the black and white lens of childish morality, and so calling an action outright wrong seems to be, if not childish, then certainly not exculsively adult.

Furthermore, it's quite clear that manipulating the emotions of others can be highly productive. It's a very good way of securing advantages for yourself.

Reply 9

domlague

1

Hi all!

I think emotional maturity is knowing the true meaning of forgiveness - the unconditional kind. It's perhaps my biggest strength and yet my biggest weakness that I can forgive almost anything.

Being able to look at the world objectively is also a sign of maturity, as is realising that other people have faults and are genuinely human. And that you do and are as well!

- Just my few random thoughts on the subject :smile:

,

- me.

Reply 10

Joric

Anonymous

as said in question.

people say that some 16 year olds are emotionally mature and some 20 year olds are immature. i always try to do the mature thing altho a lot of the time it backfires. but ive always wondered how to define emotional maturity. and what is maturity...

If you get emotionally screwed and do not shout, you are mature. :smile:

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

define emotionally screwed...what do you mean and in what context?

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

how can you manipulate someones emotions?

Reply 13

wajiha

I've always understood emotional maturity to be something gradual. As you learn and grow from mistakes you understand what is necessary and whats not. Anyone can say that they're mature, but its just living life with a bit more sense about the world and the people around you. Being able to balance your emotions but also being logical. I wouldn't say there's an age, its when you can tell that you've changed from the way you used to think.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

OP

wajiha

I've always understood emotional maturity to be something gradual. As you learn and grow from mistakes you understand what is necessary and whats not. Anyone can say that they're mature, but its just living life with a bit more sense about the world and the people around you. Being able to balance your emotions but also being logical. I wouldn't say there's an age, its when you can tell that you've changed from the way you used to think.

when you say 'its when you can tell that you've changed from the way you used to think', for example i used to fine little kids annoying, and i used to lose my temper with them, i now ignore it and act calm with them. or is this a better example, when you get to 6th form you starting seeing teachers as normal people with their own personalities etc rather than authoritative mean figures. well there was this one teacher i had a crush on, i had feelings for him, and saw him as a father figure but at the same time, someone authoritative, well i dont see him like that anymore ever since entering 6th form, just someone normal now.
would that correspond with what you said?