Flatmate problems?

I have a flatmate (big wow) who fancies me. I'd already agreed to live with her (and four others) next year, before I found this out. We still do things together - go to the same clubs, etc, because we have the same sort of interests (mainly our taste in music). But recently it's been quite annoying.

See, whenever she has a drink or three (which is basically every night we go out) her true side comes out - she acts really jealous when I mention my girlfriend, even in passing, which is acceptable, I guess. But in addition, she often either mishears me or, presumably as a result of the booze, doesn't understand me, and acts completely offhand with me for the rest of the night! When I try to explain things to her, she says the one thing that she knows gets my back up ... "Yeah, OK, if you say so".
You have no idea how annoying that is, to have a drunkard saying that to you when you're not that tipsy (we do rounds when we're out, and I'm 6'4", and she's ... not, hence the difference).

Anyone been in the same, or a similar situation? Any advice? I can't really just ignore her because we're pretty much the only two in our flat that get along, and we will go to the same club nights and stuff, and we have a good few 'shared friends', so it wouldn't really be practical.

Thanks anyway :s-smilie:

Reply 1

L i b

Hmmm.... I've been in a similar situation, I find being entirely honest and not giving that much of a toss seems to work wonders in the long run.

You're doing something to encourage her, that seems to be the way of these things, find out what it is and stop - or simply become totally withdrawn.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Rehypnol is a tad understated.

...Lynch me! Please!!! Oh God, I am such an evilllllllllle person. Muhahahahahaha.

Reply 3

McGJunior88

But I hate being totally withdrawn, and don't like making a big thing of it in front of other people - if I don't socialise as much with my/our mates, they'll know something's up, and I don't want that.

Reply 4

Posh Portia Kabine

Do you flirt with her? If she thinks she's got half a chance with you, then that's why she's acting jealous.

Reply 5

McGJunior88

She knows she doesn't. We get along, and yes, I flirt with her a little, but less than I do with my other female friends. Me and my girlfriend have been together over two years now, and my flatmate isn't exactly the naive type, if you get what I mean. She knows nothing will happen, honest.

Reply 6

Posh Portia Kabine

I reckon (in my tipsy presumptuous mood) that she probably exudes that she doesn't think nothing will happen, because she's probably quite aloof re: the situation when sober, but when she's drunk, her true feelings display themselves.

I mean, people can convince themselves of pretty much anything, you don't hear her inner commentary, she might well have convinced herself that you secretly desire her, and are too scared to act... Who knows. It's a difficult situation though! There's no easy answer, I'm just speculating.

Reply 7

McGJunior88

Remind me - nay, both myself and V_B - to re-read this in the mornig, and try to explain what the hell was going through our minds :s alcohol was not a good idea

Reply 8

Posh Portia Kabine

ha ha... So true.

Reply 9

Pandy

To be fair, I sympathise completely OP. But at the same time I can see where she's coming from... if she really likes you it's probably the only way she can deal with it. She'll get over it eventually, people always do...