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Case Of The EX
Basically i have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now. Since we both started uni. Everything is going ok, we had a few problems inbetween but we are ok now.
However, since the start of the relationship there is one person getting in the way. His ex. The stupid b**** keeps texting him. I don't say much for sake of argument, but one day when his phone was lying there i went through it and she was asking him to meet her and saying things like are you sure this is what you want? I was devastated cuz i thought that he was gonna meet her, but then i looked in his sent messages and every reply to her stupid texts was 'whatever, leave me alone,' and 'goodbye.' I know he is over her but i can't help but feel
I love him so much, and i trust him...but i don't trust her.
She even sent him pics of her in her underwear to his email add and texted him saying i've emailed you something so if anyone else has access to your emails make sure you read it now and delete. Slapper. I was like check them then and he was like 'no what's the point? I don't care.'
Afterwards he told me he had looked at the email and that they were just pics of him and her but that he didn't wanna show me cuz he thought that i would get upset. I didn't believe him so i took a look when he wasn't there and she was posing in her underwear. I didn't feel insecure or anything because i don't wish to brag but my figure is much better than hers and my boyfriend is always telling me how i've got the best figure he's seen.
I didn't say anything to my boyfriend cuz i didn't want him to get mad at me for going through his emails so i left it. I know he doesn't tell me that she texts and stuff because he doesn't wanna hurt me, and although i respect that i also told him that i drive myself crazy wondering whether she has texted him and that i just want him to be honest with me. It's caused so many problems for us. One particular day when she texted i was so upset i wasn't even talking to him properly, just felt like she was gonna niggle her way back in and she was gonna take him away from me. He started to cry. I felt so bad. I was like 'why you crying babe?' He said that he felt like that '****ing bitch' was gonna get in the way of me and him and that she was gonna drive me away from him.
He was like 'why won't she just leave me alone?' My best friend said that it was a form of harassment and that the police could be informed. His ex used to send him pics of them when they were together, of them kissing and stuff, which were just awful for me to see
My boyfriend didn't wanna go to the police cuz he said it was too extreme and that she would get bored sooner or later. It has now been a fair few months since and she texted him saying she had kissed someone else and whether he minded?!?! He was like no because i am going out with someone else anyway do what you want!! She keeps texting him and i'm getting more and more
What can i do? He keeps telling me he doesn't give a crap about her. But how can i stop her texting him? Should i just ring her and tell her to sling her hook? My boyfriend is upset with the fact that he can't stop her texting but why doesn't he just stop texting her to go away and stuff and totally ignore her?
I'm so because i love him so much and i just want her to let us get on with it. She's like obssessed with him!
Anyone else been in a similar situation? Any ideas on what to do? x
However, since the start of the relationship there is one person getting in the way. His ex. The stupid b**** keeps texting him. I don't say much for sake of argument, but one day when his phone was lying there i went through it and she was asking him to meet her and saying things like are you sure this is what you want? I was devastated cuz i thought that he was gonna meet her, but then i looked in his sent messages and every reply to her stupid texts was 'whatever, leave me alone,' and 'goodbye.' I know he is over her but i can't help but feel
I love him so much, and i trust him...but i don't trust her.She even sent him pics of her in her underwear to his email add and texted him saying i've emailed you something so if anyone else has access to your emails make sure you read it now and delete. Slapper. I was like check them then and he was like 'no what's the point? I don't care.'
Afterwards he told me he had looked at the email and that they were just pics of him and her but that he didn't wanna show me cuz he thought that i would get upset. I didn't believe him so i took a look when he wasn't there and she was posing in her underwear. I didn't feel insecure or anything because i don't wish to brag but my figure is much better than hers and my boyfriend is always telling me how i've got the best figure he's seen.
I didn't say anything to my boyfriend cuz i didn't want him to get mad at me for going through his emails so i left it. I know he doesn't tell me that she texts and stuff because he doesn't wanna hurt me, and although i respect that i also told him that i drive myself crazy wondering whether she has texted him and that i just want him to be honest with me. It's caused so many problems for us. One particular day when she texted i was so upset i wasn't even talking to him properly, just felt like she was gonna niggle her way back in and she was gonna take him away from me. He started to cry. I felt so bad. I was like 'why you crying babe?' He said that he felt like that '****ing bitch' was gonna get in the way of me and him and that she was gonna drive me away from him.
He was like 'why won't she just leave me alone?' My best friend said that it was a form of harassment and that the police could be informed. His ex used to send him pics of them when they were together, of them kissing and stuff, which were just awful for me to see
My boyfriend didn't wanna go to the police cuz he said it was too extreme and that she would get bored sooner or later. It has now been a fair few months since and she texted him saying she had kissed someone else and whether he minded?!?! He was like no because i am going out with someone else anyway do what you want!! She keeps texting him and i'm getting more and more
What can i do? He keeps telling me he doesn't give a crap about her. But how can i stop her texting him? Should i just ring her and tell her to sling her hook? My boyfriend is upset with the fact that he can't stop her texting but why doesn't he just stop texting her to go away and stuff and totally ignore her?
I'm so
because i love him so much and i just want her to let us get on with it. She's like obssessed with him!Anyone else been in a similar situation? Any ideas on what to do?
xReply 1
if he calls his phone company you can barr certain numbers so they cant text or call anymore try this cause that only gives her e-mail as a source of contact and she would probs get bored of email quicker than textin and calling
Reply 2
Can't he block her number and her email?
Reply 3
You shouldn't have looked through his phone and emails without permission. If you trusted him completely, you would take his word rather than checking up on him. You had no right to do that, and you can't even admit what you did...
Anyway, there isn't much you can do i'm afraid, it's up to him. He can either ignore her texts or emails, get her number and email address blocked or change them. He has to stop texting her to get rid of her but right now, he isn't doing that. Until he does, she'll always be there.
Anyway, there isn't much you can do i'm afraid, it's up to him. He can either ignore her texts or emails, get her number and email address blocked or change them. He has to stop texting her to get rid of her but right now, he isn't doing that. Until he does, she'll always be there.
Reply 4
Hmm, I would ask your bf why he keeps texting her back! He needs to stop worrying about her feelings and start worrying about yours!
My ex used to do the same thing - he'd text me all the time. It was usually just stupid things, but sometimes he'd drop hints that he wanted to get back together. I eventually stopped replying and he gave up.
My ex used to do the same thing - he'd text me all the time. It was usually just stupid things, but sometimes he'd drop hints that he wanted to get back together. I eventually stopped replying and he gave up.
Reply 5
Your boyfriend needs to stop replying to her texts for a start. That may be enough to make her realise she ain't getting anywhere.
Reply 7
If he can't block her number then all he can really do is stop replying when she texts, the fact that he is replying is giving her attention and a reason to text again. If he doesn't reply to any of her texts and deletes them as soon as he gets them she should get the message (excuse the unintended pun)and she might stop bothering him, it would depend on how persistant she is. If my ex stopped texting me completely i would understand and stop contacting him.
I hope my ex's girlfriend doesn't feel this way about me, although i'm not texting him anything dodgy or sending him pics of me in my underwear, just stuff like asking him when he is next home and does he wanna meet for a drink and catch up, we're just friends, but then knowing my ex-boyfriend he probably wouldn't tell her i was his ex so as not to worry her or maybe he would he used to wind me up showing me texts he had got from his ex before me, but that was different cos it was totally obvious she wanted him back.
I hope my ex's girlfriend doesn't feel this way about me, although i'm not texting him anything dodgy or sending him pics of me in my underwear, just stuff like asking him when he is next home and does he wanna meet for a drink and catch up, we're just friends, but then knowing my ex-boyfriend he probably wouldn't tell her i was his ex so as not to worry her or maybe he would he used to wind me up showing me texts he had got from his ex before me, but that was different cos it was totally obvious she wanted him back.
Maybe your bf should just totally ignore her and stop texting for her to go away. Block the girl's number, or even get a new number, and simply delete without reading any of her emails.
And you, my dear, stop being insecure. Your bf sounds like he loves you and is faithful to you and you alone. You need to stop checking his emails and texts behind his back - that's not trust - and without trust, your relationship will not work. So make it work - promise it to yourself and your bf - you will hold that urge to read his stuff and you will trust him. Think - what reasons has he given you to not trust him? Nothing. So know that you are being paranoid and you need to sort out your own problem - namely a problem of trust.
Either stop being paranoid and trust him, because a relationship without trust will never work - or break up with him, let the ex win and end your own misery.
I know that sounds harsh, but that's what I told myself last summer, when I was paranoid that my bf was gonna break up with me due to various reasons. And I told myself exactly that - either end your own misery and break up, or trust him and stop being paranoid. And since I was NOT gonna let pointless and unreasonable paranoia get in the way and destroy something that could be so good, I decided to trust him. And I got through it. I still have my moments - but overall, I'm over it now. Be strong - know that your boyfriend loves you - and there is nothing to worry about, because he loves YOU. It's you he loves, not her. Therefore it's you he wants, not her. And it doesn't matter how hard the ex tries, if he loves you, he will want you and you alone, not her. She can't wriggle her way back in because he doesn't want her and doesn't love her.
He loves you - there's nothing to worry about.
Be secure in your relationship and your love for each other.
And you, my dear, stop being insecure. Your bf sounds like he loves you and is faithful to you and you alone. You need to stop checking his emails and texts behind his back - that's not trust - and without trust, your relationship will not work. So make it work - promise it to yourself and your bf - you will hold that urge to read his stuff and you will trust him. Think - what reasons has he given you to not trust him? Nothing. So know that you are being paranoid and you need to sort out your own problem - namely a problem of trust.
Either stop being paranoid and trust him, because a relationship without trust will never work - or break up with him, let the ex win and end your own misery.
I know that sounds harsh, but that's what I told myself last summer, when I was paranoid that my bf was gonna break up with me due to various reasons. And I told myself exactly that - either end your own misery and break up, or trust him and stop being paranoid. And since I was NOT gonna let pointless and unreasonable paranoia get in the way and destroy something that could be so good, I decided to trust him. And I got through it. I still have my moments - but overall, I'm over it now. Be strong - know that your boyfriend loves you - and there is nothing to worry about, because he loves YOU. It's you he loves, not her. Therefore it's you he wants, not her. And it doesn't matter how hard the ex tries, if he loves you, he will want you and you alone, not her. She can't wriggle her way back in because he doesn't want her and doesn't love her.
He loves you - there's nothing to worry about.
Be secure in your relationship and your love for each other.
My ex kept texting me for ages and started getting nasty so I tried to get his number blocked by phoning the phone company, but apparently they need a police reference number, so he would have to go to the police first. In the end I ignored him and he stopped, but recently he has discovered my Facebook account (he requested me as a friend and I stupidly accepted, so as not to look bitter) and he keeps posting on my wall, so I've now stopped replying and hoped he'll sod off again.
Reply 11
I sympathise, OP. My boyfriend's ex kept telling him that she knew where I lived and she was going to light a newspaper and put it through my door
She would ring him from various different phone numbers and tell him I was a slapper and she knew all these blokes I'd slept with etc etc.. She used to call me things as intellegent as "ugly fat bitch", and actually for a little while I avoided going out with my friends in case she recognised me and ruined everybody's night.
It was pretty awful and people telling you to "get over it, don't let it bother you", etc.. It doesn't help at all. My boyfriend thought she had a screw loose and just kind of brushed it all off, but eventually he decided to call her mum (as a last resort) but it didn't help, in fact it got worse.
We had to bite the bullet and call the local police station who, as far as I'm aware, sent an officer round to her house to have a word with her. We haven't heard a peep from her since.
The think is, no matter how ridiculous her emails/texts were, a small part of me wondered if he would actually believe what she was saying eventually.. I know that she was very minipulative during their relationship and I was scared that he would start doubting me as her allegations grew.
She apparently asked practically every man in Sheffield if he knew who I was.
She sent my boyfriend a list of names of guys I'd apparently slept with, and a few I was still sleeping with!! 
That girl was a serious fruit loop. I just hope she dropped dead somewhere
Hope this helps!
She would ring him from various different phone numbers and tell him I was a slapper and she knew all these blokes I'd slept with etc etc.. She used to call me things as intellegent as "ugly fat bitch", and actually for a little while I avoided going out with my friends in case she recognised me and ruined everybody's night.
It was pretty awful and people telling you to "get over it, don't let it bother you", etc.. It doesn't help at all. My boyfriend thought she had a screw loose and just kind of brushed it all off, but eventually he decided to call her mum (as a last resort) but it didn't help, in fact it got worse.
We had to bite the bullet and call the local police station who, as far as I'm aware, sent an officer round to her house to have a word with her. We haven't heard a peep from her since.
The think is, no matter how ridiculous her emails/texts were, a small part of me wondered if he would actually believe what she was saying eventually.. I know that she was very minipulative during their relationship and I was scared that he would start doubting me as her allegations grew.
She apparently asked practically every man in Sheffield if he knew who I was.
She sent my boyfriend a list of names of guys I'd apparently slept with, and a few I was still sleeping with!! That girl was a serious fruit loop. I just hope she dropped dead somewhere
Hope this helps!
Reply 13
irisng
Maybe your bf should just totally ignore her and stop texting for her to go away. Block the girl's number, or even get a new number, and simply delete without reading any of her emails.
And you, my dear, stop being insecure. Your bf sounds like he loves you and is faithful to you and you alone. You need to stop checking his emails and texts behind his back - that's not trust - and without trust, your relationship will not work. So make it work - promise it to yourself and your bf - you will hold that urge to read his stuff and you will trust him. Think - what reasons has he given you to not trust him? Nothing. So know that you are being paranoid and you need to sort out your own problem - namely a problem of trust.
Either stop being paranoid and trust him, because a relationship without trust will never work - or break up with him, let the ex win and end your own misery.
I know that sounds harsh, but that's what I told myself last summer, when I was paranoid that my bf was gonna break up with me due to various reasons. And I told myself exactly that - either end your own misery and break up, or trust him and stop being paranoid. And since I was NOT gonna let pointless and unreasonable paranoia get in the way and destroy something that could be so good, I decided to trust him. And I got through it. I still have my moments - but overall, I'm over it now. Be strong - know that your boyfriend loves you - and there is nothing to worry about, because he loves YOU. It's you he loves, not her. Therefore it's you he wants, not her. And it doesn't matter how hard the ex tries, if he loves you, he will want you and you alone, not her. She can't wriggle her way back in because he doesn't want her and doesn't love her.
He loves you - there's nothing to worry about. Be secure in your relationship and your love for each other.
And you, my dear, stop being insecure. Your bf sounds like he loves you and is faithful to you and you alone. You need to stop checking his emails and texts behind his back - that's not trust - and without trust, your relationship will not work. So make it work - promise it to yourself and your bf - you will hold that urge to read his stuff and you will trust him. Think - what reasons has he given you to not trust him? Nothing. So know that you are being paranoid and you need to sort out your own problem - namely a problem of trust.
Either stop being paranoid and trust him, because a relationship without trust will never work - or break up with him, let the ex win and end your own misery.
I know that sounds harsh, but that's what I told myself last summer, when I was paranoid that my bf was gonna break up with me due to various reasons. And I told myself exactly that - either end your own misery and break up, or trust him and stop being paranoid. And since I was NOT gonna let pointless and unreasonable paranoia get in the way and destroy something that could be so good, I decided to trust him. And I got through it. I still have my moments - but overall, I'm over it now. Be strong - know that your boyfriend loves you - and there is nothing to worry about, because he loves YOU. It's you he loves, not her. Therefore it's you he wants, not her. And it doesn't matter how hard the ex tries, if he loves you, he will want you and you alone, not her. She can't wriggle her way back in because he doesn't want her and doesn't love her.
He loves you - there's nothing to worry about.
Be secure in your relationship and your love for each other.Thanks for the advice. And you're completely right. I just hate that silly cow. I just wanna be left alone so me and my boyfriend can get on with our lives. I know i was wrong to go through his emails but he knows i was looking through his phone cuz i told him and he dint mind too much cuz i would let him go through mine. Thanks once again
Reply 14
Just for the reference of everyone, you CAN NOT block phone numbers from contacting you unless your mobile phone has settings to do it, OR you get the police to contact their service provider, but then it needs to be a serious case to get them involved.
Reply 16
damnthelackofnames
I'd say continual harrassment was case enough.
You'd be very surprised.
Needs to be death threats etc before they're likely to take action I'm afraid.
Reply 17
they split up for a reason... and the fact that he's been texting her back means nothing, especially when he is telling her he doesn't care etc.
She's obviously jealous and just needs to get over it. Don't let her spoil anything between you two. Maybe get your boyfriend to give her a call and tell her to push off?? After that, ignore her, she'll definately know she isn't wanted.
Its such a shame to see people go to desperate lengths to get an ex back... expecially when they are in a relationship.
She's obviously jealous and just needs to get over it. Don't let her spoil anything between you two. Maybe get your boyfriend to give her a call and tell her to push off?? After that, ignore her, she'll definately know she isn't wanted.
Its such a shame to see people go to desperate lengths to get an ex back... expecially when they are in a relationship.
He could maybe get a new sim card and change his phone number? But really he should stop replying to her texts. It all seems pretty sound though, and the stuff he's kept from you was just to protect your feelings rather than anything sinister I think. I'm sure you're really angry at this girl but I suppose she just is finding it hard to get over her ex, and I think we've all been there. Good luck though, I do feel for you.
Reply 19
Yeah, to actually give some advise here, there is an apt saying, 'Dont feed the trolls'.
His contact is whats driving her to persue this. Cutting contact will make her bored.
Its like Bullying the weird kid. Its only funny when he turns round and explodes with anger. lol
His contact is whats driving her to persue this. Cutting contact will make her bored.
Its like Bullying the weird kid. Its only funny when he turns round and explodes with anger. lol
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