The Student Room Group

Have you ever used cucumbers/bananas/other veg for impure purposes?

You know what I mean.

Lets go anons, list all your used items
Reply 1
Wtf is wrong with you?
Reply 2
Original post by Davalla
Wtf is wrong with you?


So people who use vegetables to masturbate have something wrong with them? Its cheaper than a dildo. I've never done it, Im just asking other people whether they have to see if its relatively common. If you are so repressed and conservative, perhaps the sexual health section of this forum isnt for you. bye
Reply 3
Original post by driftawaay
So people who use vegetables to masturbate have something wrong with them? Its cheaper than a dildo. I've never done it, Im just asking other people whether they have to see if its relatively common. If you are so repressed and conservative, perhaps the sexual health section of this forum isnt for you. bye


Yes. "Its cheaper than a dildo"- if you are using it only as a one time thing then yes, but unless you plan on shoving the same molding piece of vegetation up the vagina each time you fancy a thrill: you may as well invest in a reusable item that is designed for this sort of thing.

This thread type of fundamentally 'Do you shag vegetables?' barely counts as a valid constituent under the Sexual Health section of the forum anyway. Further more, your last couple of thread posts listed in chronological order are:
"Girls, have you ever had a wet dream?"
"Have you ever been caught fapping/flipping the bean?"
Then we have a normal post about rep points.
But then we return to "I wanked three times today"
Then "what's the most pleasurable feeling you've ever had?"
And now this.

I reiterate: wtf is wrong with you?

It says a lot about the current stereotypical Western environment people would rather bounce on a carrot than eat the bloody thing. Or maybe Western females in the current obesogenic environment are so obsessed with food that they have forgotten how to eat and instead decide that they want to shove all the food they can into any old hole?

I don't know.
(edited 8 years ago)
My year 10 Chemistry teacher was a lovely person, but spent a bit more time telling rude jokes than teaching the subject. It's the one I didn't get an A in...

Anyway, one I remember is that there's this man who tells his friends that he's desperate to lose his virginity. 'Ah,' they say, 'why don't you go to Ms D's house? She puts a banana in a hole in the floor, then rides that while masturbating - go to her cellar, paint your penis yellow, stick it through the hole, and she'll never know.' So he goes off to buy the paint...

The next day, he sees his friends again. 'Did it work?' 'Yes,' he says, 'but you didn't tell me she peeled the banana first....'
Reply 5
My gf confessed to using a carrot with a condom on in her younger days. Could have knocked me over with a feather...

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