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concerned about my sexuality
hey, i'm currently 17 and single.i've had 2 girlfriends in the past (one for a month, the other for 10 months), both hurt me.now when i was 15,16 i had a few admirers and thought i was alright looking.however, after splitting up with my ex (who quickly went off with her best friend may i add), my love life has been dry,absolutely dry.today i was talking to a female friend of mine, and i don't know why but i suggested that i might be gay when i'm older.she replied and said "yeh i could see you being gay, it wouldn't be an issue". now i do act quite gay at times and the way i speak and my mannerisms would sometimes suggest so.in addition to this, i've almost totally stopped fancying girls and find a few guys "cute".however, the thought of doing things with another guy (other than kissing) kind of scares me.i'm concerned about my sexuality and was wondering if anybody could give me some help! am i turning gay? is it just a phase? could i be bi? the other day, for some weird reason,because my team leader was really nice to me (he's gay)..i considered ****ing him off, but like i said it scared me,even though it did appeal to me when the idea first came to my head.
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Anonymous
hey, i'm currently 17 and single.i've had 2 girlfriends in the past (one for a month, the other for 10 months), both hurt me.now when i was 15,16 i had a few admirers and thought i was alright looking.however, after splitting up with my ex (who quickly went off with her best friend may i add), my love life has been dry,absolutely dry.today i was talking to a female friend of mine, and i don't know why but i suggested that i might be gay when i'm older.she replied and said "yeh i could see you being gay, it wouldn't be an issue". now i do act quite gay at times and the way i speak and my mannerisms would sometimes suggest so.in addition to this, i've almost totally stopped fancying girls and find a few guys "cute".however, the thought of doing things with another guy (other than kissing) kind of scares me.i'm concerned about my sexuality and was wondering if anybody could give me some help! am i turning gay? is it just a phase? could i be bi? the other day, for some weird reason,because my team leader was really nice to me (he's gay)..i considered ****ing him off, but like i said it scared me,even though it did appeal to me when the idea first came to my head.
Awwww hun I'm the same at the moment (although I'm female) I think sexuality is fluid like, meaning that whilst some people are 'totally straight' or 'totally gay' most people are somewhere in between and move between the labels if that makes sense.
I've been confused for few months and I used to question myself constantly
but now I'm sort of beginning to accept that I'm probably bisexual. (I have fantasies about kissing other girls and everything else but sex 
) although I'm convinced that it's just a phase. A gay friend of mine says that it'll unfortunately take a while to work out if I am bi or not so this may apply to you too! 
In time you will work out for sure what you are but going bck what you've said , I would say that you're most likely bicurious (straight but curious about the same sex) bisexual or straight but going through a phase.
I hope that's helped even just a tiny bit, goodluck hun
it's scary (believe me I know!) but hopefully it will all come clearer in time 
xx
ps. it's a bit out there (another idea suggested) but you could try looking at a picture of a scantily clad man and asking yourself some questions like, 'would I kiss him?', 'would I sleep with him?' etc.
Bit deep but it might help clear things up a bit!
also don't be concerned! there's nothing wrong with not being straight
im not sure if you are gay. Mannerisms are society's doing. Males in uk are changing hugely and so are women. stereotypical beliefs are going and people are getting confused. I think you need timeout and see who you get attrcated to. good luck!
Basically when i was 16 i was convinced i was straight, i thought i fancied girls, but it turned out that i was well and truly in denial, then when i was 18 i convinced i was bisexual, who just like girls more, and then i liked boys more, and then when i turned 20 i found out for sure i was gay, because i sat myself down and thought to myself, allthough certain girls are quite attractive, would i want to have sex with them, the answer was no, i never had a sexual fantacy about a girl before so why was i kidding myself? and i had sexual fantacies about guys so i put 2 and 2 together and realised i was gay.
for you i think you still have a long way to go, lots of questions to ask, but in the end you'll get there! and then if you feel comfortable you can label yoursef. but the answer never comes quickly or easily
for you i think you still have a long way to go, lots of questions to ask, but in the end you'll get there! and then if you feel comfortable you can label yoursef. but the answer never comes quickly or easily
Tbh it just sort of happens i act a lil gay sometimes but that don't make me gay! I also love girls!
But i have a questions if it is okay for girls to find other girls cute in a totally heterosexual way why can't guys without getting all screwed up about it?
I think the friend who said to you "Yh i could see you as gay" has really preyed on your mind.
But i have a questions if it is okay for girls to find other girls cute in a totally heterosexual way why can't guys without getting all screwed up about it?
I think the friend who said to you "Yh i could see you as gay" has really preyed on your mind.
Just give yourself time, don't fret about it, mull it over, in the end you will be able to tell how you really feel.
k im a girl and i think boys have a strickter stereotype. Man like meat, man control, man like woman, man be player. etc but with women the whole cooking thing and other stuff has faded and there really arent as many demands. Im not gay but i look at women and notice things which are attractive, i can appreciate that but its not necessarily what i want i can see why people would want it. When a guy does that hes going against some rules made and then i think he wonders why hes not conforming! and gets in a rush to sort it out. Girls due to lack of pressure here i thik are slightly more relaxed.
This is what ive come to think over the years neways
This is what ive come to think over the years neways
Acting like a metro doesnt mean your gay... just your personality.
Nor does it matter if someone else can 'imagine' you being gay...
geez.. Your probably just an over excited teen and since they cant find a girl to hump, are looking elsewhere.
Ofcourse if you do think your bi/gay, do whatever pleases your fancy.
Nor does it matter if someone else can 'imagine' you being gay...
geez.. Your probably just an over excited teen and since they cant find a girl to hump, are looking elsewhere.
Ofcourse if you do think your bi/gay, do whatever pleases your fancy.
You don't have to be gay just because you've gone off girls recently. You could just be going through a patch where you don't have that much sex drive? It could also be a phase, or a time where your natural potential for bisexuality is just surfacing more. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 17 and I've only had two now. Don't worry about it. And don't feel limited by boundaries of sexuality - try to ignore them, because they're not conducive to your own psychological wellbeing. The way I see it is that I go out with/kiss/sleep with people, I don't confine myself between the two poles of straight and gay, nor do I use the word bisexuality to describe it, because I still feel that it's nameless. Anyway, I don't want to push this upon you; I just think you should forget about it and see what happens, rather than seeing one kind of sexual desire as disturbing.
Pffff. Woe is me, poor men, so awful for us. I don't know how you can say this when there are still so many sexual stereotypes of women and so many prejudices. The world is still biased in favour of men. However, I would concede that stereotypes are limiting for both sexes. I would just argue that they are more limiting for women. I mean, what about the Madonna/whore dichotomy? You read so many judgmental posts on this board, often written by women themselves, saying that women who have a high sex drive are "sluts", and female sexual dysfunction simply isn't taken as seriously as male. I could go on...
3 anon
Man like meat, man control, man like woman, man be player. etc but with women the whole cooking thing and other stuff has faded and there really arent as many demands.
Pffff. Woe is me, poor men, so awful for us. I don't know how you can say this when there are still so many sexual stereotypes of women and so many prejudices. The world is still biased in favour of men. However, I would concede that stereotypes are limiting for both sexes. I would just argue that they are more limiting for women. I mean, what about the Madonna/whore dichotomy? You read so many judgmental posts on this board, often written by women themselves, saying that women who have a high sex drive are "sluts", and female sexual dysfunction simply isn't taken as seriously as male. I could go on...
The people who can have a laugh about acting gay sometimes are the people most comfortable with their sexuality. Ever seen Gareth of the Office? He pretends to be a straight ex-TA member. In reality he's as gay as a goose. I'm straight, but I like a laugh and don't pretend to be the macho-macho man of the year who is just interested in scoring girls and being a player.
Anonymous
Awwww hun I'm the same at the moment (although I'm female) I think sexuality is fluid like, meaning that whilst some people are 'totally straight' or 'totally gay' most people are somewhere in between and move between the labels if that makes sense.
I've been confused for few months and I used to question myself constantly
but now I'm sort of beginning to accept that I'm probably bisexual. (I have fantasies about kissing other girls and everything else but sex ) although I'm convinced that it's just a phase. A gay friend of mine says that it'll unfortunately take a while to work out if I am bi or not so this may apply to you too!
In time you will work out for sure what you are but going bck what you've said , I would say that you're most likely bicurious (straight but curious about the same sex) bisexual or straight but going through a phase.
I hope that's helped even just a tiny bit, goodluck hun it's scary (believe me I know!) but hopefully it will all come clearer in time
xx
ps. it's a bit out there (another idea suggested) but you could try looking at a picture of a scantily clad man and asking yourself some questions like, 'would I kiss him?', 'would I sleep with him?' etc.
Bit deep but it might help clear things up a bit!
also don't be concerned! there's nothing wrong with not being straight
I've been confused for few months and I used to question myself constantly
but now I'm sort of beginning to accept that I'm probably bisexual. (I have fantasies about kissing other girls and everything else but sex ) although I'm convinced that it's just a phase. A gay friend of mine says that it'll unfortunately take a while to work out if I am bi or not so this may apply to you too! In time you will work out for sure what you are but going bck what you've said , I would say that you're most likely bicurious (straight but curious about the same sex) bisexual or straight but going through a phase.
I hope that's helped even just a tiny bit, goodluck hun
it's scary (believe me I know!) but hopefully it will all come clearer in time xx
ps. it's a bit out there (another idea suggested) but you could try looking at a picture of a scantily clad man and asking yourself some questions like, 'would I kiss him?', 'would I sleep with him?' etc.
Bit deep but it might help clear things up a bit!
also don't be concerned! there's nothing wrong with not being straight
this is some amazing advice.it's greatly appreciated,from the bottom of my heart-thank you.today i was flirting with a boy from my school, who acts really camp but i'm not sure if he's actually gay.in a way i actually enjoyed it and i'm going to see how my sexuality progresses over the next few months.thanks to everybody else that has given me some advice as well.
Just stay strong and don't be afraid to have an open mind, if you think a guy is attractive, let yourself think that, don't block it; similarly, if you think a girl is attractive, let yourself think that also. The easiest way for people to find themselves sexually is to ensure they aren't in any form of denial, everything will become a lot clearly. I'm kinda like you, I'm 16 and bisexual, with a leaning to guys...just gotta find what works for you. PM me if you wanna compare stories!
Anonymous
this is some amazing advice.it's greatly appreciated,from the bottom of my heart-thank you.today i was flirting with a boy from my school, who acts really camp but i'm not sure if he's actually gay.in a way i actually enjoyed it and i'm going to see how my sexuality progresses over the next few months.thanks to everybody else that has given me some advice as well.
awwww
I'm glad I was of some help Yep, good idea, I'm giving myself time as well
I suppose that's the best thing we can do. If you have any more questions about confusion etc. from a currently confused person's point of view
I'll be more than happy to try and answer your questions x
Awwww hun I'm the same at the moment (although I'm female) I think sexuality is fluid like, meaning that whilst some people are 'totally straight' or 'totally gay' most people are somewhere in between and move between the labels if that makes sense.
I agree with this anonymous person. Basically i think that even the term 'bisexual' suggests that really sexuality is, as the quoted person said, 'fluid'. I consider myself bisexual because i have sexual fantasies involving guys and girls (i am female by the way), yes, including actual sex.... (big ooooooo lol.) There is no reason to put a definition to your feelings and who you find sexually attractive. I dont want to say im gay or straight or sometimes even bi because i believe it can swing either way at any stage of your life and back again. I suppose you could conclude that therefore bisexual is an appropriate term but it is possible to say that when you're with someone of your own sex you're gay and when you're with someone of the opposite sex you're straight... what im trying to say is it is entirely up to you what you want to 'label' yourself as. You dont need to ask people what you are... you just know. And these days theres no need to worry about it either... just enjoy it! Even if you dont want to explore your fantasies or even contemplate having sex with another guy it doesnt mean that you dont belong to a 'label', it doesnt mean you dont know who you are. Sexuality is fluid!
Have fun!!!!
XXX
I wouldn't get into a relationship yet.
Thats my personal opinion, you dont wanna hurt your current girlfriend/boyfriend (depending on whether you "decide" your straight or not) by telling them that your gay/straight and you just realised, that would really hurt them.
I would just wait, maybe go out clubbing or something and see if you are properly homosexual.
Thats my personal opinion, you dont wanna hurt your current girlfriend/boyfriend (depending on whether you "decide" your straight or not) by telling them that your gay/straight and you just realised, that would really hurt them.
I would just wait, maybe go out clubbing or something and see if you are properly homosexual.
Awwww hun I'm the same at the moment (although I'm female) I think sexuality is fluid like, meaning that whilst some people are 'totally straight' or 'totally gay' most people are somewhere in between and move between the labels if that makes sense.
I've been confused for few months and I used to question myself constantly
but now I'm sort of beginning to accept that I'm probably bisexual. (I have fantasies about kissing other girls and everything else but sex ) although I'm convinced that it's just a phase. A gay friend of mine says that it'll unfortunately take a while to work out if I am bi or not so this may apply to you too!
In time you will work out for sure what you are but going bck what you've said , I would say that you're most likely bicurious (straight but curious about the same sex) bisexual or straight but going through a phase.
I hope that's helped even just a tiny bit, goodluck hun it's scary (believe me I know!) but hopefully it will all come clearer in time
xx
ps. it's a bit out there (another idea suggested) but you could try looking at a picture of a scantily clad man and asking yourself some questions like, 'would I kiss him?', 'would I sleep with him?' etc.
Bit deep but it might help clear things up a bit!
also don't be concerned! there's nothing wrong with not being straight
I've been confused for few months and I used to question myself constantly
but now I'm sort of beginning to accept that I'm probably bisexual. (I have fantasies about kissing other girls and everything else but sex ) although I'm convinced that it's just a phase. A gay friend of mine says that it'll unfortunately take a while to work out if I am bi or not so this may apply to you too!
In time you will work out for sure what you are but going bck what you've said , I would say that you're most likely bicurious (straight but curious about the same sex) bisexual or straight but going through a phase.
I hope that's helped even just a tiny bit, goodluck hun it's scary (believe me I know!) but hopefully it will all come clearer in time
xx
ps. it's a bit out there (another idea suggested) but you could try looking at a picture of a scantily clad man and asking yourself some questions like, 'would I kiss him?', 'would I sleep with him?' etc.
Bit deep but it might help clear things up a bit!
also don't be concerned! there's nothing wrong with not being straight
Yeah I think that that was some great advice!
me too
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